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who's the parent?

(25 Posts)
Phraedd Sat 11-Aug-07 18:34:39

i know this will really anger some of you but why do some parents complain about the food their children eat?

Who is responsible for the shopping and making of the meals?

Today we went to waitrose and there was a lady chopping up and giving away samples of tomato. My 3 children (8, 6 and 3) asked if they could have some and the lady was very suprised that the children ate it???

Do most children not eat salad? My children know that they have to drink lots of water and eat lots of fruit and veg in order to stay healthy.

This evening they had sandwiches and they all had cheese and cucumber. They know that a sandwich needs to have protein and a bit of a salady type something (letttuce, cucumber or tomato). Why are parents buying jam and chocolate spread and then complaining that that's what their child wants?

My children know that those things are "party" food and that there is no nutrition in them.

I recently went on holiday with my inlaws and whilst their children where eating chips most days (5 days in a row!!!), mine were eating salad and veggies. (mean mummy??)

Don't get me wrong, my children occasionally have "junk" but generally they have a healthy varied diet and they all know what a healthy meal should consist of ie the other day i was doing Lamb and rice and my DD (8), asked me what veggies we were having as she couldn't see any! so just for her, i thought i should put some on for everyone! This is because i keep saying to the children that their meals should have veg, protein and carbs in order to be balanced.

They are all very good at drinking water aswell which makes life very easy.

LucyJones Sat 11-Aug-07 18:35:58

Sounds like you're doing a brilliant job

roisin Sat 11-Aug-07 18:42:02


MaureenMLove Sat 11-Aug-07 18:43:55

Well done you. As long as you teach that everything is OK in moderation, then you're on the right track.

alucard Sat 11-Aug-07 19:02:48

Your kids sound great. I have found that if people see my dcs eating something that they don't consider to be a 'child' food (spinach, squid, fish thats not in finger form, loads of veggies, curry, lentils etc)then they think its ok to say loudly in front of dcs 'ooh, do they eat that? Thats disgusting/amazing/wierd for kids isn't it?' Makes me want to punch them. How dare they think they can give my dcs (nearly 2and 3.5yrs) a complex about eating 'wierd' food.

oneplusone Sat 11-Aug-07 19:39:52

I totally agree with you Phraedd, my kids eat loads of veggies, fruit and have a healthy balanced diet. They do have their fair share of junk too but not for their main meals, just as extra snacks or treats.

I also think the parents are to blame for instilling bad food habits in their children, and once a habit is formed it's very hard to break and so they are potentially causing long term problems for their children.

I grew up with parents who ate healthily and I'm grateful that they taught me good habits which I am now passing on to my children and my children basically eat what we eat ie curries, salads, rice, pasta, fruit etc etc. They have never been to McD's or had chicken nuggets etc as I just don't eat that kind of food myself.

Of course every parent wants to do the best for their children but I for one am very conscious that if bad habits are ingrained from a young age they will be very hard to break later on and so I simply don't buy things like chocolate spread etc.

wulfricsmummy Sat 11-Aug-07 19:46:50

Message withdrawn

Tortington Sat 11-Aug-07 19:49:56

i think is about introducing variety so that they don't say that they don't like it before they try it.

today i bought cous cous and humous ( with pesto mmmmm) i toasted some pita and cut into dippable strips. DD has tried and doesn't like cous cous - but i was enjoying it so much she just had to re-try becuase she soooooo wanted to like it - she still didn't but i think its indicative of a mentality with which she has been brought up.

oneplusone Sat 11-Aug-07 19:52:49

My DD is now 4 and is starting to get slightly picky, but I never make an issue of it and let her leave the few little bits she doesn't like.

I think there is an element of luck in it perhaps, both DH and I are foodies and pretty much eat something different every night ie mexican, chinese, indian, sri lankan, italian, (not ready meals, I cook) so there is always something different on every night so I guess the kids just get lots of variety and there is always something I've made that they like even if there might be particular bits they don't like IYKWIM.

We have a big salad most nights as well with our meal and I have never forced my DD to eat any salad but I think through watching us eat she now actually asks for a bit of salad as well and eats some of it which is good enough for me!

JeremyVile Sat 11-Aug-07 19:53:20

I completely agree with your sentiments, we have the same approach.

But honestly, this thread is a blatant, whacking great pat on your own back isn't it?

Phraedd Sat 11-Aug-07 20:03:25

actually i posted it after reading someone elses post and she was complaining about what her child ate.

She is the parent...she chooses what comes into the house, not the child.

Sorry if i came across wrong

JeremyVile Sat 11-Aug-07 20:09:14

No - i'm just being cheeky.
Keep up the good work.

stleger Sat 11-Aug-07 20:10:52

I don't think a tomato which isn't in sauce form has ever passed the lips of any of my kids. They are 15, 14 and 10. They have favourites, but between them eat most vegetables. Ds,at 15, has just established tha hummous is made of chick peas; he is fairly sure he doesn't like chick peas and is now very confused!

oneplusone Sat 11-Aug-07 20:16:34

Nothing wrong with a pat on the back for us mums Jeremy, it is the most unappreciated job in the world and as most of the time we are putting ourselves down and feeling useless and inadequate a pat on the back is most welcome! Even if it us patting our own backs!

Cammelia Sat 11-Aug-07 20:21:11

A pat on the back from me Phraedd.

Trouble is I don't think all adults realise what constitutes a healthy diet.

And I've had people say to me that their children don't eat stuff because they don't like it themselves.

Some people are surprised that my dd eats tons of salad and always has done.

gess Sat 11-Aug-07 20:32:17

Pat yourself on the back but don't assume its always simple. DS1 ate everything and anything until he regressed and became autistic- then for 5 years he ate a handful of foods (gluten free pizza, gluten free toast and buckwheat pancakes). DS2 grew up in that environment and unsurprisingly was affected by it (Seeing your sibling shuddering with food and screaming if stuff goes near him puts you off)- mealtimes are still difficult with him and hehas real issues around a lot of food. DS1's fabulous teacher spent a year working with him desensitising the food issues (bits of crisps with a tiny bit of baked bean sauce etc, then working up to one baked bean sandwiched between 2 tiny bits of crip) and after a year he gradually began to eat (starting with mashed potato); now eats pretty well. DS3 was weaned in an environment of ds1 eating, and although being gluten free as well, eats very healthily.

It's not always as simple as what is brought into the house.

alucard Sat 11-Aug-07 20:36:46

just remembered hillarious thing intelligent educated woman at my mother and toddler group said when kids were given grated cheese for a snack.

'you shouldn't give them that cheese. You should give them dairylea because its got calcium in it'

bloody marketing

GoingThroughChanges Sat 11-Aug-07 20:36:55

A slice of smug pie anyone?

meandmyflyingmachine Sat 11-Aug-07 20:40:28

How lovely.

Ds (my eldest) is the same. He is a joy to feed. He is the only person in our family (including me and dh) whoo eats broad beans.

I felt as you did .

Then I had dd...

It's not that simple.

MingMingtheWonderPet Sat 11-Aug-07 20:56:01

trouble is, it doesn't always work out.
DS is a fab eater, eats all his veggies and always checks he has had his 5 a day! A joy to feed.
However DD (age 2) is a pain in the bum and I have to make a real effort to get her to eat anything healthy - it is such a shock to me. I continue to give her the same as everyone else 9eg checken, mashed potato and carrots) but more often than not she won't eat it. I just hope she gives in one day and figures she may as well eat it cos it is going to keep on coming!

MingMingtheWonderPet Sat 11-Aug-07 20:57:02

Whoa, meandmyflyingmachine. Crossed posts, but we must be telepathic! Spooky

coppertop Sat 11-Aug-07 20:59:31

I agree that it's not always that simple. Dd will happily eat anything that is given to her. I can't honestly remember her ever refusing anything. Ds1 eats healthy food but only a very narrow range. He is very thin and eats very little. Ds2 lives mainly on bread, milk and yoghurt. If it were just a question of the parents' involvement then all 3 would be either like dd or like ds2.

meandmyflyingmachine Sat 11-Aug-07 21:02:50

Well, I did read yours and wonder if it was me - but your dd eats chicken....

MingMingtheWonderPet Sat 11-Aug-07 21:07:00

Well no, she doesn't actually eat chicken. She has it on her plate, it moves around a bit and gets mashed into the potato and carrot and tries to make it look like she might have eaten some, but she's fooling no-one!

P.S. - DS's favourite vegetable is broccoli, DD would probably rather starve to death than touch it!

TheLadyEvenstar Mon 13-Aug-07 07:02:04

OH well guess I am a bad mum then, I have allowed my ds a choice of meals since he was about 2. When we went shopping I would let him help with what we bought. he is now 9 he does eat veg, some salad but like me is not a lover of it, fruit again some not all. He has a well balanced diet but he eats the foods he likes and wants. He is not a great meat eater loves duck, loves various fish etc. I would never make anyone eat something i didnt' like so this is how I have raised him....

Last night we had lovely crusty bread with strawberry jam on it as a snack, the night before peanut butter sandwiches, the night before roasted turkey and tomato sandwiches, pork with stuffing sandwiches. Oh and this morning we are having pancakes for breakfast.

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