How to get 2 month old to sleep not on me

[Mrbumpoid]

How do you get a two month old to sleep without having to be on someone? She'll get to sleep on me, I put her down and she wakes and cries

[hormonesorDHbeingadick]

Cosleep. It’s the only things that works for me.

[JayDot500]

Co sleep if you haven't tried. It's the only thing that got him off me

[Boobiliboobiliboo]

Read up on the fourth trimester. And then enjoy the cuddles.

[BlueMoon1103]

Hi OP, none of the above answers are helpful or what you were asking for. Try putting something that smells like you (a blanket or t-shirt) in baby’s bed or warming it first with a hot water bottle but take it out before you put baby in!

[HJWT]

I used to put a muslin down my top for an hour or so and then put it in DD's bed, didn't work every night but would sometimes x

[Mrbumpoid]

@BlueMoon1103 oh that's a great idea!

[mumofone234]

We managed this using a next to me cot with a pillowcase on the bottom that smelled of us - I would put DS down and then hold him right up against me (awkward pose half in the cot) until he went off and then slowly release. Naptimes were another matter though - only managed that using the same technique at five months. Until that point, he just wanted to sleep on me. With hindsight, I wish I hadn’t got so stressed about trying to make him go down for a nap. It was just something he needed to do as a little one, and I got so caught up in people telling me that he ‘ought’ to be sleeping independently that it became very stressful. If I had another baby, I’d 100% just let it sleep on me for the first few months because it’s what they want to do. That’s just me though - I do appreciate that you have other things you want to do in the day too!

[Oct18mummy]

Perseverance...I had same thing and kept putting him down and three days later and lots of sleeplessness he got the hang of it and starting sleeping through the night! (Which all stopped at 4 months!) x

[Boobiliboobiliboo]

3 month old babies aren’t supposed to sleep through the night.

[BlueMoon1103]

@Boobiliboobiliboo it depends on baby’s weight. Heavier babies sleep through sooner (they are ‘programmed’ not to until they reach about 13lbs I think). My DS who is a big baby started sleeping through - 5 hours + a night just before 3 months old. Not because I taught him to, he just did it! Also I know posters have mentioned it but the OP didn’t say anything about sleeping through, just how to have baby sleep not on someone!

[SallyWD]

Have you tried swaddling? Mine were swaddled until 6 months and it makes them feel like they're being held. Put in the top you've been wearing that day so they can smell you. I started putting them in the moses basket and staying near them. They would sometimes cry or grizzle but I didn't get them out. I just lay next to them patting or stroking them/shushing them. They learnt they wouldn't be taken out but it was OK and mummy was nearby. White noise worked if they were really going for it.

[Boobiliboobiliboo]

www.mother.ly/news/its-science-cuddling-your-baby-can-have-a-positive-effect-on-their-genes

[BlueMoon1103]

www.mother.ly/news/its-science-cuddling-your-baby-can-have-a-positive-effect-on-their-genes

Meanwhile back in the real world where Mums have to do other things (day, sleep, wash) other than cuddling their baby all day

[WilsonandNoodles]

Swaddle, last feed while swaddled and they will hopefully fall asleep and when you put them down they still feel like they are being held. Also another vote for something that smells of you.

[HenSolo]

Hi op I had the same issue and got no sleep! A helpful midwife showed me how to co sleep safely and ds was happy to sleep beside me while of course still waking regularly for feeds - but at least I could sleep too! Some babies really love to be close all the time so if you can embrace that rather than fighting it, it may help. Just my experience of course. Best of luck!

[Boobiliboobiliboo]

Meanwhile back in the real world where Mums have to do other things (day, sleep, wash) other than cuddling their baby all day

It’s about balance. You don’t have to cuddle them all the time.

The co-sleeping suggestions above deal with one of your examples (and one makes no sense ).

[Mrbumpoid]

Thank you for all of these replies! I will try everything you have suggested!

I do know that she is so young and just wants me and I am more than happy to have her on me as much a possible. It's just my partner is away for three days and two nights and I am still recovering from a traumatic birth and in lots of pain and discomfort so it kind of makes it worse.

[Boobiliboobiliboo]

I do know that she is so young and just wants me and I am more than happy to have her on me as much a possible. It's just my partner is away for three days and two nights and I am still recovering from a traumatic birth and in lots of pain and discomfort so it kind of makes it worse.

I get how tough that is (still having PTSD treatment 8 years post birth). My husband worked away for all but 36 hours per week for 2 years when DD was born. I did whatever got me through the day. Cosleeping meant we both got maximum sleep.

[Mrbumpoid]

@HenSolo what was the safe co-sleeping way? I’m terrified of SIDS

[flairyfairy]

I had this. A Sleepyhead worked absolute wonders.

[coffeeagogo]

I used a little zip up swaddle like this: www.amazon.co.uk/Summer-Infant-Swaddle-Pod-Pink/dp/B003FV8S7I?tag=mumsnet&ascsubtag=mnforum-21 as both mine liked being swaddled and used my T-shirt to line the basket. I found it just takes time as they need to adjust to sleeping alone. I worked at it as I just couldn't cope with having a baby on me all the time, it really stressed me out.

[flairyfairy]

Also, a sling for when you want your hands free to do other things. I had a baby who didn’t want to be put down for the first six months, these two things saved me!

[Mrbumpoid]

@Boobiliboobiliboo oh wow!

[HenSolo]

Oh sorry for the lack of info! Basic things like no pillows or covers on the bed, I lay on my side, baby had my breast in his mouth then if I accidentally fell asleep he could just roll onto his back, my husband was booted out to the spare room.

It’s absolutely not for everyone, but the risk with me was I was so sleep deprived I was likely to fall asleep holding him which would have been more dangerous. Never ever thought I would co sleep!

Here’s advice from the lullaby trust -

www.lullabytrust.org.uk/safer-sleep-advice/co-sleeping/