Children alone on 2.5hr taxi trip

[user1467634265]

I would value your thoughts on the following situation ...

3 lively boys (5,9,11). Mother and father live 100 miles apart after M moved away with the children. Children have alternate weekends with F. M has to get children to F after school on a Friday and F has to return them on a Sunday night.

M is proposing to use a DBS cleared taxi driver to do the 2.5 - 3.5 hour journey and will NOT be accompanying the children on the trip. The driver comes recommended as someone who does school runs for a local school. Driver has done one trip with M accompanying the children.

F has concerns about the arrangement.

Thoughts gratefully received 🙂.

[SmartPlay]

I don't see a problem with this, especially if the driver is used to driving children travelling alone.

But why does a 100 mile trip take 2,5-3,5 hours?

[user1467634265]

City centre driving and country lanes. On a good run its 2.5hrs. On a bad day it could be 4hrs +.

[Mintjulia]

If it’s a specific driver, properly checked and the three children are together, no, I don’t see a problem.
If the 11 yo has a phone, that would add an extra level of reassurance.

[SmartPlay]

Wow, sounds very tedious.

[euro23451277]

Doesn’t sound an issue but what if one Of the boys needs the toilet? Would you be happy the taxi stopping and the eldest taking the boys to the toilet? just one to think about

[ItsAllGoingToBeFine]

I'd be very surprised if a taxi driver was willing to be solely responsible for three unaccompanied children?

[Mummyshark2018]

I wouldn't be happy with this. An hour maybe but that length of time you need to think about rest breaks/ loo breaks/ food/ drink/ entertainment.

[Shantotto]

No way. It wouldn’t be fair on the 11 year old for a start - they’d be default in charge if anyone needed to stop or was car sick or something happened. Can’t imagine the taxi driver giving much of a shit of being very happy if something happened.

[TitianaTitsling]

Will M be paying solely for taxi or seeking money from F also?

[TitianaTitsling]

And would it be in emergency circs only or does M not wish to do the journey? I don't think it's a good idea.

[PalindromicUser]

Yeah absolutely not. My kids start bickering after about half an hour in the car with us, I can’t see how this would be any different. Not a great idea.

[user1467634265]

My will be paying but its far more expensive than a childminder/nanny on a train on the train so it isn't based on financial considerations.

[Mrsjayy]

I can't see a taxi driver wanting to be solely responsible for 3 children for 3 hours ? I Feel for the kids having to sit in acar for that length of time without an adult they know .

[user1467634265]

It would be every 2 weeks. M seems not to spend the time doing the journey. F will be accompanying the children on the return trip.

[Mrsjayy]

What if they start bickering or want the toilet?

[Comefromaway]

My concern would be a child needing the toilet, or feeling unwell/being travel sick or the 5 year old playing up etc.

I can’t see a taxi driver agreeing to that without an escort.

[Kerberos]

Still doesn't sound ideal but given M has accompanied the children once, she's confident in his ability to handle them, they've now met the driver and he's got experience of handling them and their ages it seems like a reasonable solution.

Would be better if M and F worked together to find a better solution though but if it's court ordered this way I guess all other compromises have been exhausted.

I feel most for the kids in this to be honest.

[BogglesGoggles]

When I was growing up there was a spate of taxi drivers sexually abusing children on trips from home to school. It was also general advice for vulnerable people (lone women, children, drunk) not to take taxis unaccompanied. There is no way I would put my children in a car with a strange man for 2.5-3.5 hours.

[user1467634265]

Taxi driver is 75. Has been a parent before. But three lively bickering boys, one of which is only 5, for what could be over 4 hours is quite an ask for anyone.

[Shplot]

I’ve been told my son has to do that every day to go to school but it’s not something I’m comfortable with

[PalindromicUser]

OP who are you in all of this? I’m guessing you’re on F’s side?

[AllFourOfThem]

I would have no issues with this taxi driver driving my children. However, due to the ages it is more than just a driving concern - they effectively need to be parented during the journey because of its length and the possibility of a need for toilet or for breaks. If the journey can take up to 4+ hours then it seems very unfair to expect a taxi driver to do all of this (if indeed they would do so). I think one parent should do one journey each with the children or else is responsible for paying for a suitable adult to take their place.

[user1467634265]

@Kerberos .. court didn't order an unaccompanied taxi journey. It is Ms plan to get boys to F which she must do on a Friday night.

[bionicnemonic]

Personally I wouldn’t be happy about that. My 17yo DS doesn’t like taxis (and come to think of it I don’t either) as being alone with someone you don’t know in a confined space isn’t in the least relaxing. What if something happened? Anything, even something minor. I saw a taxi load of people stranded on the motorway a couple of weeks ago...how would he get them all out to safety behind a barrier?

[Drum2018]

Can you both not do half way drop off/pick up on the Friday and Sunday? I wouldn't be happy with the taxi arrangement.