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How many Mum's are in photos

(36 Posts)
POPPY1490 Tue 16-Apr-19 10:54:28

I recently sat down and looked over all the photos of my daughters first year. I only have a handful where I'm in them. I found myself counting the photos and found that I'm only in about 50 photos of her first year.
I so wish I had more. I feel sad I don't have many more of the two of us. Am I the only one feeling this way or are other mums absent in photos to x

Seeline Tue 16-Apr-19 10:58:27

Mine are in their teens and I doubt that I have 50 photos where I am with either of them!

My DH just isn't into photos - hates being in them, but never thinks to take them of me with the kids (he is not techy either so still relies on having an actual camera rather than snapping away on a phone).

Now the DCs hate having their picture taken too...…..

englishdictionary Tue 16-Apr-19 10:58:50

50 is loads. I don't even have 50 photos of my DC's from just one year.

cariadlet Tue 16-Apr-19 10:59:54

50 sounds a hell of a lot to me. But I'm old enough to remember the pre-digital days when camera film was precious and we took a fraction of the photos that people take now.

noenergy Tue 16-Apr-19 11:28:02

50 is a lot. I don't even have that many if DC in 1 year, I only take photos on special occasions or if we r having a special day out. Or holiday

4square Tue 16-Apr-19 11:31:05

Yes OP you are right. Focusing on the number 50 isn’t relevant, I bet it’s 50 out of thousands if you’re using your phone all the time to take pictures when your baby is tiny. If you have a DP I bet it’s because they never get around to taking photos and if they do they don’t consider having you in them. Really common I think.

Solution: selfies with your baby/child! (Probably the only good thing about selfies).
Do it, no matter what you think you look like at that moment.

Imicola Tue 16-Apr-19 14:39:42

I've been reminding /asking DH to take photos with me in them every few weeks, otherwise they are all of baby alone, or him plus baby! Annoying.

POPPY1490 Tue 16-Apr-19 16:27:02

It's the same with videos I wish I had more of them when she was little. It's not till u look back over them you realise what little u have ☹️

brizzlemint Tue 16-Apr-19 16:31:51

There is only one photo of me, full stop.

Eggstatic Tue 16-Apr-19 16:38:12

I think 50 for one year is quite a lot but I understand what you mean. I only have a handful with my first but I've taken more with them as the years have gone on. I've made sure I at least have some because I only have one picture with my mum and that was taken a few years ago, weird to think we didn't have a single one before then and now she's no longer around so I'm glad I have that one picture

SalemSpellman Tue 16-Apr-19 17:05:28

I've said to my husband that my DD is going to think I wasn't part of her life for the first year because I'm hardly in any photos!

Shockers Tue 16-Apr-19 17:13:15

I have thousands of photos of DH with our (now older) children. There are very few of me with them; nobody else ever thinks to take photos.

AnchorDownDeepBreath Tue 16-Apr-19 18:43:18

There are very few photos of me between birth until I'm about 17. Three that I know of, two that I have.

Bigearringsbigsmile Tue 16-Apr-19 18:46:48

I have less than 50 photos of me with my son's and they are 19 and 16. I hate having my photo taken.

LorelaiRoryEmily Tue 16-Apr-19 18:49:06

I don’t have many with me and ds when he was a baby. Dh just didn’t think to take them. I actually had a bit of a meltdown with him one day over it. His sister was here and holding ds and they were playing and dh went rushing to get his phone and take a photo. I was so upset.
When he asked what was wrong I asked him to show me how many photos he had of me and ds and he had about 5. He had loads of ds with mil,fil and sils and sweet fuck all of me.
The apparently insignificant person who gave birth to ds.
He’s much better now but there’s still more of him

CalamityJune Tue 16-Apr-19 18:56:31

I have very few photos of me with DS and the ones I do have are either crap selfies or ones that I have asked to be taken and so inevitably are cringey.

I've got so many nice moments of DH where neither of them even knew I was taking photos.

I don't even have the classic, sat up proudly holding him in the hospital bed one sad Just the sweaty, veiny boobed, twenty chins skin to skin post birth snap.

BlueAndYellowPurplePills Tue 16-Apr-19 19:02:33

This is me too.
My Dp never ever thinks to take photos. We went out today I took 130 phots of the kids and a few with him in. None of me. I didn’t even do a selfie.
My kids will think he brought them up alone. 😭🤬

Shelbybear Tue 16-Apr-19 19:35:02

50 is loads. I have 15ish if I'm lucky of us both. I take so many photos and videos of her but not really with us both. Think we have 1 pic of the 3 of us which is really bad, she's 2 now.

sanmiguel Tue 16-Apr-19 21:33:30

Mine are 11 plus and I'd say I have no more than 11 pics of me and DC and they're prob selfies!

Flicketyflack Tue 16-Apr-19 21:43:10

I have noticed this too!

I also have less than five of my husband, me and my children either or as babies or now.... sad

We have taken more group selfies but that means we are always just a group of heads grin

Flicketyflack Tue 16-Apr-19 21:43:26

I have noticed this too!

I also have less than five of my husband, me and my children either or as babies or now.... sad

We have taken more group selfies but that means we are always just a group of heads grin

POPPY1490 Wed 17-Apr-19 09:13:15

Thank you to you all. I thought I was the only one feeling this way over photographs. I'm going to start asking my family to take the odd photo of us together.

CadburysTastesVileNow Wed 17-Apr-19 20:47:02

On the other hand: once you have dc number 2, you won't even take 50 photos !

LonelyTiredandLow Fri 19-Apr-19 04:40:46

I'm a single parent, so I noticed this very early on.
Get a selfie stick and try to remember to take one of you as a group when you get to whatever day trip you do, is my advice.
I love taking photos though and sometimes am glad no one is pointing the camera at me. Yes, if you have a partner they should/could help, but from what i've heard from married friends it doesn't seem to be the case. So take it into your own hands!

Ohhellothereladyface Fri 19-Apr-19 19:48:03

OP I feel your pain! I’m constantly taking photos of DD, and DD with OH/ DD with her little friends etc and sometimes I realise it looks like I don’t exist! I sometimes worry she will look through photos when she’s older and think I never did anything with her because it doesn’t look like I’m even there!

Domesticdunce Fri 19-Apr-19 19:50:42

I used to be into photography and i took thousands of photos of my ex with the dc. There is one photo of me as a baby and no photos of me with my children.

purpleweasel Mon 29-Apr-19 13:21:24

There are two reasons to take photos/videos: for you & your kids to look back on them in their young days, but also for your kids to have records of you too. So make sure if you can that you and your partner are in some of the films so your kids have footage of you to look at in later years

justasking111 Mon 29-Apr-19 13:24:12

I am in so few with three children OH is in lots. You have to say just take a photo of me with the kids. At DS wedding I asked the photographer to take a photo of me with 3 sons. He did it was fab DIL framed and gave it to me. OH still sulking about it grin

freshasthebrightbluesky Mon 29-Apr-19 13:57:02

There is one of me with my 1st as a baby, taken whilst in hospital and there is another one, somewhere, that my sil took with feeding my dc1.
There are no photos at all of me with dc2 as a newborn.
There are no photos at all of me on our 1st family holiday.
The only photos we had of us as a family and not just dh+dc, until recently when I made us all have a family selfie in the living room, are from our wedding.
The only reason why dh takes occasional photos of me with dc now is because I moaned so much about the lack of anything with me in and explained how much it upset me that if I were to die, the dc would have no photos of me either on my own or with them.
My dc have had their own cameras since they were 3 and they've taken more pictures of me than he ever has so I've had a few printed out and either put in the family albums or they have them in their rooms. I think he just takes it for granted that I'm there. There are loads of him with the dc.

freshasthebrightbluesky Mon 29-Apr-19 14:01:11

CadburysTastesVileNow
On the other hand: once you have dc number 2, you won't even take 50 photos!

Not strictly true; since dc2 was a child I started getting interested in photography so took more pictures with them rather than fewer. I'm just very rarely in any of the shots!

Topseyt Tue 30-Apr-19 08:52:31

Fifty is quite a lot. I don't think I am on even a dozen pics of our three as babies, but I am happy that way because they are far more photogenic than me.

You need a selfie stick for your phone if you want regular photos of you and the kids without having to rely on other people all the time.

purpleweasel Tue 30-Apr-19 16:47:41

Or, as with freshasthebrightbluesky, give the kids cameras, or let them have a go with yours if it's not too expensive/breakable. You will get lots of odd pictures but you might get a few really good ones too

Orangecake123 Tue 07-May-19 14:26:31

I'm currently 27. I honestly only have 3 photos with my father and 3 with my mother altogether. I wish I had more from when I was younger.

I think this is actully a very common thing. Make an effort to take more now OP.

Gone2far Thu 09-May-19 17:52:21

I call myself the Invisible Woman. It's not unkindness on my oh's side, just thoughtlessness. We did have a chat about it though so he does take more.

Gwlondon Sat 11-May-19 22:03:48

I have been so upset by this. Especially as I have so many photos of other people holding my kids when they were babies. Wtf. Can’t believe no one wanted to take a photo of me with them.
Also my husband used to take so many blury photos and insist they weren’t blury.

BalloonSlayer Wed 15-May-19 17:31:16

DH is lousy at taking photos bless him. I asked him to take a nice one of me with baby DS2 so that I had a good postnatal picture, I'd got dressed in something nice especially. When I saw it (non digital camera) my t-shirt was all rucked up so my belly was hanging out, hmm - DH clearly hadn't noticed it. Thanks DH!

Last weekend we went out with - now much older! - DS2. I took a nice picture of DH and DS2 at a scenic point with my phone - point, no adjustments, click, lovely!

DH asked if I wanted one. Oh yes please! We stand there. He faffs with the screen, going in closer . . . further away . . . closer . . . further away. Takes it. Gives me my phone back. We walk off. Later I have a look. DS and I are specks in the distance and out of focus. The photo of DS and DH, however, is fab. WTF?

I never have any decent photos!

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