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Parenting

Did you save up before having kids?

35 replies

shhsecret · 21/02/2019 14:42

Hi All☺️

Just a general question really where I am intrigued to see what the answers will be!

Did you save before having children, if so, how much did you have saved? Or did you just wing it? For those whose babies weren't planned, did you just adapt to your situation?

We're thinking of starting a family next year but have no idea how much to have in the pot before. My DP wants to have a decent kitty behind us, as well as saving during the 9 months.

So basically I'm being really nosey!

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MaverickSnoopy · 21/02/2019 14:52

DC1 - saved 9 months salary (as was only entitled to smp) before ttc, then took 9 months off. Received 13 weeks half pay when I told them I was returning to work and 7 weeks full pay when I returned as "bonuses".

DC2 - semi surprise baby (shouldn't have been surprised but were about to start ttc anyway) and was entitled to 6 months full pay during mat leave, so saved 6 months salary during pregnancy and took 12 months mat leave (plus holiday).

DC3 - actual surprise baby and only entitled to smp. Saved nothing and cut our cloth accordingly - it's been tight and stressful but we have a pretty okish buffer just in case.

I would always advocate saving, especially with childcare costs and you can always then have the money as a back up if needed in the future.

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Lazypuppy · 21/02/2019 16:12

Planned baby. Saved part of my pay once on mat leave (6 months full pay) to pay myself during 3 months SMP then back to work so think i savedabout £1000 in total

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Dragongirl10 · 21/02/2019 16:16

Yes, owned reasonable sized property, (mortgaged, but low) I have saved since 19, as had DH, though we met and married much, much later.
Decent pension, both good jobs/business.

I saw how hard it was for my parents at times, and was determined from a young age to have security as fast as l possible could.

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bengalcat · 21/02/2019 16:17

Not consciously but I did have my own mortgaged property and planned on returning to work when full maternity pay stopped ie at 18 weeks

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Notso · 21/02/2019 16:26

Not for any of the four.
Replacing a salary has never been an issue as we've always lived off one.
We were very skint in the early days of DC1's childhood, but we had everything we needed.

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KennDodd · 21/02/2019 16:26

No but in a comfortable position at the time. Owned house outright and money in the bank from the sale of another house. Was age 35 and 38 when we had first child. Didn't return to work until youngest child (of three) went to school, lived, comfortably frugal off husband's salary during those years.

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erja · 21/02/2019 16:28

Nope, unplanned pregnancy, young, barely any money to live on never mind savings and have made it work!

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Runningbutnotscared · 21/02/2019 16:30

Not saved at all, children started out in organic Scandi cloths, lovely travel system, bed from John Lewis.
Children’s beds are now from ikea, we wear supermarket clothes. I laughed at the midwife when she told me I had to have my steak well done instead of rare. I can’t remember the last time I could afford steak.

It’s tight but we are happy.

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mynameiscalypso · 21/02/2019 16:34

I have a lovely spreadsheet which tells me what I need to save every month to cover maternity leave. I am not making a lot of progress.

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OnlyFoolsnMothers · 21/02/2019 16:36

Yes I saved enough to have 5 months on just SMP on top of 3 months full pay and still have a holiday and savings when I returned- no idea how I’ll save for a second baby given child care costs now

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Dreamzcancometrue · 21/02/2019 18:19

Was saving before I found out l was pregnant. It was a happy accident

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PortiaCastis · 21/02/2019 18:20

No I was at school

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beforeihit30 · 21/02/2019 18:36

I think circumstances have a big impact, and not in the most obvious of ways.

When we started out, we were on a low income and receiving benefits, cost of living was low. SMP wasn’t actually much different from the norm for us so didn’t need to save for living costs whilst on mat leave, just for baby things (clothes, buggy etc).

Second was unplanned and we just sort of rolled with it, and were able to use plenty of hand me downs from first child.

Third is completely different - a few years have past, much more financially stable, higher income, which means we do need to save to replace my earnings for part of mat leave (6 months is on full pay but I want to take 9 months). Also need to buy equipment again as don’t have much leftover. But, living costs are still relatively low and we have a higher disposable income (hence can save, buy stuff) so I’m not worried and taking it as it comes.

My main experience has really been to just roll with it! Probably doesn’t sound like the most sensible advice Grin I think however it’s nice to feel a bit more comfortable when you’re having a baby, to have a least a small buffer to draw on.

Not just for after baby is here, but in pregnancy as well. My first two pregnancies were fine but I did wish I could have the occasional treat (like getting a pedicure), especially once I was massive! I’m enjoying the fact that during this pregnancy I have the means to do stuff like that if I want to. In my experience, pregnancy itself can be more expensive than you expect! Things like having to get new clothes, bras, and in my case not being able to stand the sight of most uncooked food and so doing all groceries online, ordering takeaways (ahem)...

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SayNoToCarrots · 21/02/2019 18:41

No, but I'm tight anyway.

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Stopwoofing · 21/02/2019 18:44

No, but it would’ve been a very good idea as we’ve gotten into a small amount of debt in both maternity leaves (SMP a lot less than my salary) and the first 3 years are mega expensive although the new 30 hours thing must mean it is less so these days?

It’s the childcare, and loss of earnings rather than the cost of food/clothes etc.

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E20mom · 21/02/2019 18:45

No. Planned baby but luckily we knew we could afford it so we didn't save in advance.

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lboogy · 21/02/2019 19:17

Saved around 6 months salary - this was a very much wanted baby so had many years to prepare

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shhsecret · 21/02/2019 19:18

Thank you for all your responses! It's interesting to see a mix of people having savings and others not but they managed/got by!

Those of you that have said you saved for full wage on maternity, I have a stupid question! Is it full wage as in maternity and the savings topped up to make it full wage or savings was your full wage each month and the maternity pay as extra?

@Runningbutnotscared see in DP mind this is what he wants, the travel system/the expensive baby furniture etc. We come from very different backgrounds and he laughed when I said I would buy baby clothes from Primark/you could get a decent second hand cot!

@mynameiscalypso we had the idea of a spreadsheet! Interesting that you've said it isn't progressing well!!

@beforeihit30 I love the idea of putting money away to treat myself whilst pregnant, I didn't actually think of that!

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MaverickSnoopy · 21/02/2019 20:01

I had a spreadsheet when I saved mine. It worked very well. So well in fact that it was the starting point for managing all finances on a spreadsheet. Been doing this for 7 years now.

For us we saved enough to top smp up to full pay. This time around (currently on mat leave 3), I'm just getting smp and didn't save. Couldn't afford to save. However because of no childcare costs my smp equals more or less my pay was before once childcare was paid.

We did all the nice things with our first and nothing second hand. I think you just want to do I can relate. By the time baby number 3 came though it never occurs to me to buy new unless it can't be bought second hand. Nearly new uppababy double £1k in the shops - we paid £140 second hand and it included all the extras.

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Youmadorwhat · 21/02/2019 20:11

Yes, first baby I think I saved approx 5k and then saved whilst on mat leave to be honest I found I didn’t spend much at all in mar leave.second baby....no because I was a sahm by then and we had the mortgage paid off too.

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meow1989 · 21/02/2019 20:12

Yes but not consciously for a Baby. Have always had a little bit used to holidays etc and by the time mat leave started I had about 8 months salary which I'll dip into now my pay has stopped until I go back after 1w months

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Lwmommy · 21/02/2019 20:20

Saved before and during pregnancy, worked till 1.5 weeks before she was born and took 9 months maternity leave.

Costs were reduced when on May leave as didn't have travel and work costs and in general most of the big things were paid for before DD was born.

However there were several big payments that made me glad I had savings

Ended up needing to formula feed which added up quick and nursery required a big deposit alongside a months fees before I got my first full pay check.

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TalkinPeece · 21/02/2019 20:22

Not one penny.
We were massively in debt at the time
But we knew it would be OK
and it was
tax credits barely existed then so we were not "entitled to" anything

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27dresses · 21/02/2019 20:24

Nope, didn't save. Lucky that DP is wealthy.

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Frlrlrubert · 21/02/2019 20:24

Not really, but we went from wedding/honeymoon/moving/new house costs to new baby costs, and we knew that even when I went back to work my wage would be swallowed by childcare so we sort of calculated we could afford life on one wage if we scrimped and just went for it, with my SMP/my wage after childcare being for the things we can live without.

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