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Parenting

How did to manage returning to work if your baby had (minor) sleep issues?

21 replies

Sunrise888 · 18/07/2018 22:39

I go back in a few weeks and my 1yo still rouses frequently in the night looking for comfort feeds (we cosleep). I'm not ready to try sleep training yet - I'm just too soft. But I am pretty tired from all the wakings and I don't know how I will manage my job effectively when I go back - I need my brain to be working! Also when I'm tired I feel less sociable with colleagues.

Thankfully my job is only part time but I don't want to let my team down - they have been so supportive of me throughout pregnancy and maternity leave.

Is it unreasonable to go back to work without trying sleep training/gentle controlled crying? If not, how did you cope?

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DrWhy · 18/07/2018 22:45

Sadly I was just tired!
I went back when DS was 8.5 months, he was ebf and still fed at night. I survived until he was about 13 months when I had a trip away with work. DH then switched him at night to a cup of cows milk and when I came back I continued with that. From then on we could alternate nights - fortunately we have a spare room so the off duty one could get a proper sleep while the on duty one was up and down or co-sleeping with DS. He’s 22 months now and still very rarely comes close to sleeping through the night. I’m pregnant with number 2 and hoping to goodness that we get a sleeper next time round!!

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furryelephant · 18/07/2018 22:51

Coped by crying. A lot Grinthere's a huge difference in her sleep now compared to 9 months ago (20 months now) so generally coping better.

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applecatchers36 · 18/07/2018 22:53

Another tired but managing mum here, went back to work at 10 months, breast feeding through night and co -sleeping, managed to wean him off boob at 18 months and get him into own bed at 2 years. He still comes into our bed now at
27 months and has a bottle most nights but his Dad deals with it as 20 weeks pregnant. So you get used to less undisturbed sleep and it does gradually get better.

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Greenwomanofmay · 18/07/2018 22:54

I went back work full time (self employed) when DS was 9 months and some nights he's awake a lot. For various reasons I will not sleep train Some days I'm tired, the first month was really hard but generally it's fine. I have learnt to be significantly more efficient and cook easier meals and have lower standards for house etc.

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JaniceBattersby · 18/07/2018 22:57

You just get used to it. It’s surprising what you can cope with. I have four non-sleepers. Most nights I have an assortment of children in my bed including a breastfeeding one year old who likes a snack every hour or so. I cope. You will too.

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StubbleTurnips · 18/07/2018 22:59

I was a tired, zombie like employee. Still am. You just function - somehow.

DD still doesn't really slee through, and is in primary school Confused

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TheClitterati · 18/07/2018 23:00

I went back full time when dd1 was 8 months. I bf until 18 months. She didn't sleep through until she was about 2.

I was tired but it wasn't too bad. Did go to bed a bit earlier.

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Infradoug · 18/07/2018 23:00

Couldn't face sleep training either. I keep a bottle of water by my bed so if baby does wake no need to mess around with milk, just stumble over to cot, hand over bottle and back to bed. Very set bedtime routine of milk, bath, story, bed, putting baby asleep at same hour each night. Careful with dinner time - enough but not too much food (so no nighttime poos) and definitely no sugary deserts that might keep him up. Above seems to work most nights to give me a reasonable night's sleep - I've survived so far!

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LorelaiVictoriaGilmore · 18/07/2018 23:05

Coffee and painkillers. Within 6 months I had a range of illnesses that my consultant said he would only expect to see in someone very old or very young and seriously immuno compromised. So that was great.

About to do it all again only this time I'm going back at 8 months rather than 13 and dd is still up at least 4 times a night. 😬😬😬

I guess the difference is that this time I have faith that it will get better!

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kateybeth79 · 18/07/2018 23:22

I work full time and my "baby" has only just started sleeping through. She's 6!! Up until 3 years old I would spend most of the night putting her back into bed or attempting to sleep with her starfishing in my bed with me hanging off the edge! It's true that you do get used to it, but I also relied on coffee and naps whenever I could fit them in lol

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mindutopia · 19/07/2018 10:00

You just do it and it really isn’t that bad. I went back when mine was 11 months and was commuting to London 2-3 days a week, getting up at 5am to catch a train. It truly was fine. My first didn’t sleep through til she was 3.5 but I went to bed early when I could and my dh did as much as he could on the nights I had an early start. We co-slept as well and I could pretty much sleep through those night wakings as long as I didn’t have to get up. If she was poorly, needed medicine, rocking, etc my dh did that as he’d get an extra hour or two of sleep in the morning after I left for work until she got up anyway. It really was fine. I was lecturing and doing data analysis and my brain worked just fine. Coffee helps though!

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Cutesbabasmummy · 19/07/2018 10:08

I went back when my son was 9 months old. He didn't sleep through till 1 and a half. I just gritted my teeth and repeated on loop "This too shall pass!"

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BrokenWing · 19/07/2018 10:11

Co sleeping and going to bed early, sometimes 7-8pm to catch up on sleep. Ds didn't sleep through in his own bed until he was around 4 Shock so co sleeping was the easiest solution.

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midnight1983 · 19/07/2018 10:15

Honestly? I just went to work tired and drank a lot of coffee. I was working on my feet (retail) and so didn't have a chance to let the tiredness overtake me. You will be fine and baby will grow out of it.

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JeremiahBackflip · 19/07/2018 10:29

I went back to work with an 11 month old who had frequent night terrors (3 or 4 nights a week. Screaming and inconsolable. It was a side effect of medication. Lasted till he was 18 months. He's 3 now and only in the last few months had undisturbed sleep)

I drank a lot of coffee. And pretended that I wasn't tired. I told myself I just wasn't tired. It got me through.

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JeremiahBackflip · 19/07/2018 10:32

Oh, and I didn't start any type of sleep training (used the no cry sleep solution with DD and with #2 when meds finished but ended up just muddling through) when I went back as it wasn't "him" not sleeping it was the meds causing night terrors.

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Whackytaco · 19/07/2018 10:38

My second, DS, was a bloody shocker of a sleeper until he was 3. I returned to work 30 hours per week when he was 9 months old.
Myself and DH shared the load and worked tired. Our set up was DH dealt with him until 2am, any waking after was dealt with by me. That suited us as I'm an early to bed person whereas DH comes to bed later so I'd like to think the pair of did get some quality sleep at some point.

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FurryGiraffe · 19/07/2018 10:48

I went back to work full time when DS2 was ten months. At the time he had very poorly controlled asthma. On bad nights he'd only sleep upright on my/DH's shoulder while being walked around; on better nights he'd sleep upright but stationary! We slept in shifts and were both knackered, but we survived.

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eurochick · 19/07/2018 10:57

Coffee and sugar got me through- just. I was not in the running for employee of the year during that period.

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Somertime · 19/07/2018 13:27

Coffee, sugar and just not being as good at my job. 3 years on I'm probably just about back to my previous level of performance.

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Sunrise888 · 19/07/2018 13:59

Oh dear, I guess I shouldn't be surprised. I think this is something I hadn't expected when becoming a mum - that sleep would continue to be a problem after the first year and that it would continue to negatively impact my job.

I love my little one and I'm happy to have spent the last year with him (and I'd spend more time with him if I could). But I guess I'm feeling a bit sad about missed opportunities at work. It was a newish company when I joined, lots of opportunities to prove yourself and quickly get promoted and carve out almost any role you wanted. I became pregnant right on the cusp of one of these opportunities and since then, and understandably, I've seen people who started after me and within my team promoted and taking on management roles. Going back part-time and with a foggy brain is not going to help with that. 😥

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