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What is your day like as a new mum?(51 Posts)
I am 4 months pregnant with my first and starting to really wonder what it's going to be like (in a practical sense) one baby is here.
I have never been around babies and don't have any friends with young kids so don't really know who to ask so here goes.
What is your daily life like with a newborn? Could you give me an hour by hour run down of what you do in a day? I'm confused with things like taking showers or sitting on the toilet- does baby come too? Can you not leave it alone in a room in its bouncer or bed?
I work from home at the moment and trying to figure out if I could squeeze in some work while looking after baby, few hours here of there. Or if i will have to take time off for the first while.
Thanks in advance
Every baby is different but I struggled to fit in a shower with my new born. She would wake at 7 in the morning and would feed until 9 and then nap for 20 mins (I waddled to the shower) and then wake and feed until about 11.30 and I would put on clothes. My day and night continued like this. I struggled to fit in showering and eating for the first few months and I was physically and mentally ill and very sleep deprived.
Newborns mainly sleep and eat. I bf do my day pretty much consisted of feeding baby when she was awake. Watching telly with her asleep on me. I waited until my partner got in from work to take a shower. And she was in her moses basket if I needed to toilet or make some food.
I really struggled to begin with. I had somewhere safe to put him in most places for example travel cot in the living room, bouncing chair, Moses basket but he screams if he can't see me. Putting him down meant that I could have a quick wee or at a push a shower but he screams until he's sick whilst I'm in the shower. Now we have a routine. He wakes up I go in to him and breast feed for half an hour. We go downstairs I put him in his stand up toy thing whilst I make our breakfast. We eat together then go back up and I get him dressed and put him in his cot. He screams for ten minutes whilst I shower and dress. We play, he naps, sometimes in his cot for half an hour, do morning activity at midday he goes back in his kitchen toy and I make us lunch. We eat, play, nap afternoon activity dinner (between half 4 and half 5) play then bed time routine starts at half six. He likes having a routine and I get some time to myself during nap time and after bed time. It took me 8 months to get it. Good luck and take it easy.
It completely depends on the kind of baby you get I’m afraid. My first was fairly easy, would sit in his swing or sleep in his basket while I did what I needed to do inbetween feeds. My 2nd, well... I just left him screaming while I had a 2 minute shower in a safe place and would often be found bouncing the bouncer with my foot while trying to cook/clean/entertain my eldest. You’ll figure it out yourself. I’m expecting no.3 and have 0 expectations of what I’ll be able to do/get done.
Oh but please don’t be afraid to put them down and get something done quickly. Even if they are protesting! You need to eat, shower, use the loo, put a wash on and wash the pots. Obviously don’t leave them screeching for hours but if they’re fed, clean, warm and safe, it’s perfectly fine to have 5 minutes doing something that absolutely needs doing!
They eat, sleep and poop. Try to do things while they are asleep. Nothing wrong with putting moses basket in the bathroom if you don't want to leave them alone if you want a bath or shower.
I've had to lie baby on changing mat on the floor whilst going the loo. As long as they are not in any danger it's fine. Just not on a table top changer or on a bed etc.
Mostly i'm just sat on the couch watching netflix with my 2 week old asleep on me.
Routines come later. Get cuddles while you can.
With a really tiny new baby you don't really have a 'day'. You have an endless cycle of feed-burp-change-sleep that will restart every few hours. Night and day mean nothing for the first few weeks.
I never left DS on his own in the early days. He'd scream, and I was scared to anyway. I brought him into the bathroom with me and put him in his bouncer facing the shower, and tried to get in and out asap. As he got older he began to object to this and it got more stressful.
I didn't get out of the house much for the first few weeks. I had a birth injury that left me pretty much immobile for a while (I watched a lot of Vikings ) but it's so difficult getting it with a newborn anyway...
DS was a pretty easy baby - didn't cry much, fed and slept well etc. but it did knock me out completely. I actually loved it though and have very fond memories of that time.
My DS is nearly 4 weeks old, we tend to be on the sofa from 4-5am as when he wakes I leave DP to sleep so I go downstairs have a coffee and feed him whilst I watch TV, I then do DPS lunch and sometimes me and DS both have a nap 8am-9am, then he sleeps in his crib or goes in his bouncer whilst I get ready/have a shower etc, we then tend to visit friends or run errands or go the supermarket and when DP gets home I make dinner and then we settle to watch TV, DP does bath time and I then feed DS on the sofa for as long as he wants to. To be honest I have more time in the day than I expected and despite getting 4-6 hours sleep a night I actually feel fine and have more energy than I expected, I'm aware it's early days though so I might not feel like this in another 4 weeks!
Yeah it's pretty much a cycle of feed-change-sleep repeat. I bf and spent a lot of time on the sofa feeding and watching netflix in the early weeks. The first 2 weeks were good as DH was home so he could take baby while I had a shower / nap. After that I got into a mini routine in the morning of feeding DS in bed, putting him in the cot with the curtains open as he always looked towards the light and playing piano lullabies on my phone while I showered / dressed. Even if he didn't sleep it seemed to entertain him. They change so quickly though, those first few weeks can feel endless when you are in them but really they fly by!
Lots of cuddles, taking photos and just staring at them.
Also many feeds, nappy changes, while outfit changes.
Struggled to shower when dh first went back to work after paternity but you get into a routine. I used to stay in bed until about 9.30 to try and get a bit extra sleep after many night wakes. Only plan to get bare essentials done in terms of housework (here it was dishwasher and washing) and everything else when there are 2 sets of hands. I watched lots of Netflix - don’t think it will be quite the same with next one (toddler won’t let me watch Gilmore girls 😂)
I struggled so much when dd was a new born...looking back it was bliss! She was all cuddly, slept loads and only fussed when hungry. Plus when I put her down somewhere she stayed there!!
Now I have a 7mo and it's harder now than ever...i can't really shower because she doesn't nap unless being held. Going to the toilet she has to come with me or she gets up to all sorts!!
Just try to enjoy the benefits of each stage, there are hard bits but focus on the good!
Honestly it was a stream of coffee and cake dates with friends and family :-)
They nap loads, which made showers fine, so I'd spend a lot of time baking, snoozing, going on day trips etc.
My girl seemed to vaguely have a concept of day/night from birth - she'd wake up 3 hourly at night, but weirdly from day 1 would tend to go straight back off to sleep at night, whereas she'd stay awake a bit in the day.
We split the nights, so sleep deprivation wasnt really much of an issue, and we were in a vague routine from about 3 weeks.
Best time of my life :-)
Oh, and if she was in a sling then she'd come to the loo, as she was attached, but otherwise, no, I wouldn't take her. She's not going to implode if left for a minute, somewhere safe. Obviously I wouldn't leave her if she was upset, but if sleeping or just chilled out, then I just went to pee. It's much harder when they are mobile, but then you can put them in a jumparoo or a cot.
Tbh, I think letting them just 'be' a bit, or play (when they start playing), is really useful for both of you, as it means you can still get bits done. If you have a clingy baby (though it's nice anyway), then slings are fab.
someone posted on here asking for tips about parenting a baby, a few weeks ago. "Your baby can't roll off the floor" and "always have somewhere safe in each room to leave the baby" stayed with me. I put DS on the bathroom floor in his car seat and did peak a boo round the shower curtain whilst he screamed at me and I tried to wash.
Whether you can work depends if your baby sleeps. mine didn't He once slept as long at 3.5 hours in his first 6 months. I lost a suprising amount of baby weight trying to butter toast and crumpets one handed whilst jiggling the baby with the other.
I'm now expecting no. 2 and we're getting a play pen I can stick them in as I need to be able to shower and get dressed and function as a person in addition to being the milk bar.
I was really lucky and both my kids did hardly anything but feed and sleep for the first month or so. The feeding took up a lot of time and I watched plenty of Netflix, but then I also had a good hour or 2 where they’d nap and I could do whatever I wanted before I had to feed again. Plus even when awake they were usually quite content so I could easily take a shower or do housework while they played on mat or sat in swing.
It’s a bit harder now to find time to do those things with a 2.5 year old destroying the place, but at least the baby is fascinated by him. I don’t bring my baby into the loo with me. My toddler follows me everywhere though
I loved the newborn stage. As others have said, it was a cycle of eat, sleep, poop repeat, I always managed to get baby dressed and myself showered and ready each morning; then if we wanted to go out, invite someone over or something, we were good to go.
Cluster feeding was a bit of a bugger (4 hours in the boob every evening), but phased out after 5-6 weeks!
Remember every baby is different, and just as soon as you think you’re in a routine - BAM - they’ll grow, develop and mix it all up again.
My baby boy will be here next week so this has been fab to read just to reassure myself that I really don’t need to do too much in the early days except feed him, snuggle him and try to rest! I can’t wait!
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Babies just eat sleep and need cleaning and changing, none of my newborn children would of let me put them down while I had a bath, I just had a bath with them. Sleep is hard because it’s hard adjusting getting up every two hours or so, babies don’t like sleeping alone in the first few weeks so be prepared to have baby sleep on you. When I needed a wee I would just put baby in the cot with the mobile on and rush. Newborns are hard they hate being put down but soon enough they don’t mind being left for a few mins while you go to the toilet or brush your teeth.
I put my babies in a stricted routine everyday just so I know what to expect as much as them.
Wake up 8am (even after a bad night to set their baby clock) best tip I could give.
I personally wouldn’t work for the first three months at least because it’s hard adjusting to your new life and the tiredness.
My baby slept loads in the first few weeks (he was jaundiced), about 3h at a time, so I got a surprising amount done at home. I filled it with laundry cycles, sterilising bottles and pumping. When he was awake he was content to lie in his sleepyhead on the sofa. I was struggling a lot with breastfeeding but otherwise it was a relatively peaceful time! It changed later as he got older and more mobile - he became more clingy and I can't leave him for more than a few mins now at 6 months.
Best time of my life. Very sleepy and took a couple weeks to get over the traumatic feelings of childbirth, but pretty chilled days going through the routines of changing, feeding, burping, washing bottles repeat. Lots of tea and cake. Watched the whole of Breaking Bad. I would leave baby in moses basket on floor downstairs while i nipped up to the loo. She would quite happily sit in car seat on bathroom floor while i showered. I was able to get a lot more done then than i do now with a toddler. Oh and laundry. Laundry becomes your life!
Every baby is different though, I was expecting life with a newborn to be complete chaotic sleepless mayhem so I was pleasantly surprised lol.
I struggled to begin with you definitely wouldn't IMO be able to squeeze in any work with a newborn whilst they do just eat, sleep, poo repeat they have short cycles so a chance to even shower or pop to the loo can be limited. Mine is now 3 months but I still wouldn't be able to squeeze any work in he is not a great sleeper so I'm still feeling knackered in the daytime. My advice is don't expect too much of yourself in the first three months if you get things done great if not don't beat yourself up over it. I had great visions of being able to prep all evening meals, get out for walks daily and keep on top of laundry and cleaning - oh how ambitious that was!! . Congratulations on your baby enjoy them!!
My daughter is 3 months old and spent the first 8 weeks of her life screaming all day. Wish I was exaggerating! It was a really, really rough time. Things are slightly better now as she's slowly starting to come out of the colicky stage and be a bit more content throughout the day.
I usually get up between 7 and 8 and feed her in bed (my lovely DH brings me breakfast before he leaves for work). I then have a shower and plonk DD on her playmat to entertain herself (I usually take her into the bathroom with me so she can at least see me). Then after shower I attempt to get her down for a nap. She normally only naps for 20 mins at a time (😩) so that's when I attempt to get ready for the day as quickly as possible. Then various baby groups mid-morning, attempt another nap around lunchtime so I might get 5 minutes peace to eat. Usually resort to walking her in the pram or taking a drive to get her to sleep, with varying levels of success! She usually has another short nap before DH gets home from work then we each take it in turns to pacify her while one of us makes dinner. Then it's time for bath and bed and I get a blissful couple of hours peace to watch whatever crap is on tv.
I bf on demand so feeds are as and when she wants them. I do often take her to the loo with me as I have dogs so don't like to leave them unsupervised. I've found things really hard and still adjusting everyday, but I love DD to bits and getting out of the house everyday helps a lot. Hopefully you'll get an easier baby than mine!
Life was busy with a newborn but now he's 10 months, life if so very boring!
Get Up, have breakfast
Whinge for god knows how long
That's my day!
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