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Making mummy friends

(5 Posts)
Goodiegumdrops Fri 12-Jan-18 15:02:11

I started writing this frustrated then it sounded a bit angry and ranty. I think I just needed a bit of a rant and get it off my chest.

Any tips on making mummy friends when you have two under two!?

My baby - 16 weeks is a dream. My 23 month old is strong willed (like most 2 year olds), can speak really well for his age and is a bit like the duracell bunny. He likes to be up, active and engaged in everything. Not a bad home..

However, when you are at a group meeting new parents/children and the toddler doesn't want to sit down and doesn't want to share - I feel like I have a feral child and I suddenly can't parent. Then at the end of the group, the other new person with the child that just sits has the other mummy's talk to her - I feel so crap about myself. I question why that is.

1. Is it me? - I'm not a self absorbed person but that is always my first thought. I smile - not in a desperate deer in the headlights way but in a friendly how-do-you-do way. There is so a difference!
2. Do they think I am a bad mum because my son would rather run around than wave a tassle in the air?
3. I understand that no one is born knowing how to share and behave. I work bloody hard at disciplining my son. There are no empty threats. But why is it ok for your child to snatch? I apologise.. wtf!?
4. Do they think that their kids shouldn't be friends with mine.
5. I need to socialise my son (and me) so why wouldn't they say hello. We have moved to a small community- we're going to bump into each other more at some point!

I don't know what I am saying - sleep deprived and feeling like I can't parent.

Aliasgrace1 Fri 12-Jan-18 15:35:11

I have twins and I didn't get any mummy friends until they started school. Like you, I did try but I was just too busy with my boys, one in particular was into everything.

It's hard lovely, sorry I've no advice. It does get easier though I promise. My boys are 6 now and I have lots of lovely mummy friends thanks

MoanasPig Fri 12-Jan-18 15:44:42

Yes agree! My son is absolutely mad when I take him to playgroups people just look at me.. I don't know whether they feel sorry for me or whether they wish we would just bog off and get my son to stop snatching toys. For me I met someone on Facebook first and then had one on one play dates in our houses which was much better. We could relax in a more child friendly environment. How you would go about meeting someone now I'm not sure.. I'm sure there are websites for Mummy friends

MoanasPig Fri 12-Jan-18 15:47:08

Do you go to any play groups?

Kingsclerelass Sat 13-Jan-18 09:11:00

Small communities can be difficult to begin with, everyone else is familiar with each other. It can take a while. Maybe now the New Year/back to school rush & gossip is over they will be more inclusive.

But I bet it's not your parenting, I don't know anyone whose child hasn't snatched, pushed or refused to share on occasion.
Can you start with one person, maybe a neighbour and work out from there?

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