MAKEUP HELP. DD age 7 invited to a Claire's Accessories party. What do I do?

[powdercustard]

HELP. What do I do? DD AGE 7 has been invited to a Claire's Accessories birthday party! She came home saying they are going to do makeup. Isn't that far too young?

I'm not against makeup but girls are under so much pressure now. So we have decided to keep the kids away from makeup (bar nail varnish) and too much beautifying. Even TV shows and adverts with skinny beautiful women. So I definitely don't want her to get obsessed about makeup at such a young age. It may only be once, but maybe it will merge to her subconscious and make her feel the pressure to be beautiful when older?... Incidentally, I saw a kid aged 8 who had started wearing makeup all the time... it looked AWFUL.

I don't really want her to go. But she does, and understandably. As she's just started a new school with lots of new girls in the class.

What's your view? Does it matter, or not, because home influence is more important? Am I fussing? Around our neck of the woods it isn't normal to have a Claire's Accessories party, but is it elsewhere?

[EvilDoctorBallerinaDuckKeidis]

I can imagine the majority MN response, but God, lighten up! It's just playing at that age.

[fakenamefornow]

Oh, I quite like seeing little kids in make-up. As long as it's a complete mess and clear they applied it themselves. It looks awful on little girls if we'll applied. Sorry irrelevant input.

[cottonwoolbrain]

Either

a) ensure she's not available...

0r

b) just accept it as playing about and a bit of fun with a group of girls her own age...

or

c) telephone the party giving mum and rage at her about the utter inappropriateness of her proposed party

Personally I'd go with B

[EvilDoctorBallerinaDuckKeidis]

That's pretty much what I meant.

[Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar]

What makes you think she's going to come home plastered in makeup? Claire's don't even sell makeup afaik, it's all about the trinkets and accessories...
A bit of lipgloss and a temporary tattoo is probably as racy as it gets.

[AssassinatedBeauty]

I understand your reticence and I would be exactly the same about make up generally. But, I think I'd let her go to the party as it just seems too harsh to prevent her from joining in.

I would hope that a one off party wouldn't counteract your attitudes at home. You don't have to allow her to get into make up as a result, as aged 7 is definitely far too young to be thinking about appearance.

[Willswife]

I am very relaxed about my children playing with makeup. I really don't see any harm in it, although I don't allow them to go out in it. It is fun for them, they just paint themselves instead of paper!

[newtlover]

yeah, I think B
and make sure she sees you without make up on a regular basis, and never hears you say 'oh, I can't go out without my face on'
if she seems interested explore other aspects of decorating yourself for fun, like face painting, dressing up, mehndi decorations (sp?), and treat it as a fun and creative thing, rather than a conforming to stupid expectations thing

[AChickenCalledKorma]

If it helps at all, my daughter went to her first "pamper party" in reception somewhat against my better judgement. She's 15 now and wouldn't touch make up with a barge pole. So it's not necessarily the start of a slippery slope and yes, family values count for more than an hour or two at a party.

Let her go and have fun if she wants to. It's like dressing up. Doesn't mean you have to start letting her wear make up on anything like a regular basis.

[newtlover]

.....and I'm assuming all those who arte relaxed bout kids playing with make up do mean kids and not just girls....

[MrsJayy]

It will be glitter and bows and a bit of lippy it is all just playing and it washes off all claires make up comes off with water it isn't exactly mac counter is it. Does your dd want to go to her friends party ?

[MrsJayy]

I have 2 grown up daughters eldest isn't fussed youngest loves make up but she certainly didn't have a full face at 7 it is a gradual slope not a slippery slope as you are making it out to be

[powdercustard]

Thank for your comments. the helpful ones, and the unhelpful ones. I am obviously overreacting!

[AdalindSchade]

I’d hate this but I’d let her go. And I’d judge the party parents hard.

[Believeitornot]

Well my dd sees me wear make up and it's hard to keep her away from it. She has lip gloss and went through a phase of wanting to try my eye shadow/blusher etc.

She kept asking why I wore it - so I told her it was because my skin was old and looked tired. Most importantly she doesn't see me put it on daily (because I don't).

Now she's not interested/bothered by it. She's 5.

So OP I'll suspect she'll learn more from you about make up etc so set the right attitude!

[Crispsheets]

I can't get past "skinny beautiful women"

[newmumwithquestions]

I get your concern. I thinks it's sad that there is so much focus on beautifying - and to start at 7 is disappointing.

But don't stop her going. She's building friendships.

[MaisyPops]

I'd hate it because I'm not a fan of all this 'be pretty and like sparkles and unicorns' rubbish thay girls hear.

But I'd let her go. It's one party where she'll be enjoying being with her friends more than anytging else.

As long as the message at home is reasonable (neither obsessed with image or vocally anti makeup) then she'll be fine. I wouldn't police it too much.

[Tilapia]

I’m not a fan of make up on kids (and I rarely wear it myself). But I’d let my DD go to this. It’ll just be a bit of light hearted fun.

[Hotpinkangel19]

My daughter 9 went to 2 Claire’s parties... they played games, dressed in accessories and had nails painted. Used a tiny bit of lip gloss and eye shadow that even my eagle eyed husband didn’t notice!!!!

[GreatBigPolarBear]

My dd went to one at a salon at 5. I thought it would be just Glitter etc so I was quite shocked to see them all coming out with full faces. But dd was just a bit bemused and enjoyed the pizza and 'cocktails'.
I have to say that now, at 8 she loves playing with make up. It certainly hasn't come from me. I don't let her go out with anything except lip gloss on though.

[fakenamefornow]

.....and I'm assuming all those who arte relaxed bout kids playing with make up do mean kids and not just girls

Absolutely. Girls and boys do, without direct instruction, apply it differently though. Girls seem to put it on like 'make up' boys, like 'war paint'. My children never had the pleasure of this though because I don't own any make up. I remember I was at a friend's house a while ago, also a non makeup wearer. She mentioned somehow that she had some makeup upstairs and I persuaded her to get it down and we'll put it on. We were laughing so much at our makeup covered faces, it was the most fun we'd had in ages.

[AdalindSchade]

I don't let her go out with anything except lip gloss on though
why do you let an 8 year old wear any makeup out of the house?

[TickledOnion]

I don't have anything against kids wearing a bit of makeup for fun. My DDs like trying mine on. But I think it's a strange idea for a party. Mine went to a pamper party at age 5 and to be honest it was a bit boring. They had to sit still while it was done. Then again to let nails dry. I think they'd rather be bouncing around a soft play or even just playing party games.

[GreatBigPolarBear]

When I say lip gloss I mean lip balm-the colourful smelly ones from smiggle etc. She calls it lip gloss.