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Conceive baby2 whilst baby1 still not sleeping?!

(16 Posts)
user1493212170 Tue 26-Sep-17 14:03:02

HI all
Just after a little advice/opinion/experiences really...

Our son is 14 months old. He's never slept through (sleep improved then drastically regressed again recently with illness and teething- now feel we're stuck in a rut of 3 hour waking again- argh!)

We are deliberating whether to follow our original 'plan' and aim for 'number 2' to arrive anytime from when our son turns 2 years old.

I'm now just debating if I could cope with pregnancy with so many night wakings and then with two of them possibly waking through the night!

I actually don't feel too exhausted at the moment- think I'm just used to the amount of broken sleep I now get. Not sure how it'd feel if this was x 2 though!

Have considered waiting a year but as it took us nearly a year to conceive number 1 and I'm already in my 30s I feel I could regret it if we don't give it a go.

Has anyone done 'number 2 whilst number 1 still not sleeping?!'

Thanks everyone x

ODog Tue 26-Sep-17 14:30:08

I did. I have a 23 month age gap. DC1 was (still is at 3.3yo) a terrible sleeper from birth. DC2 is now 16mo and occasionally sleeps through. He hardest bit was the pregnancy. It was actually easier and I feel like I was better rested with a 2yo and a newborn.

user1493212170 Tue 26-Sep-17 14:31:31

Thanks for replying!

I guess I knew there would be other people who've been there - I just needed to hear it from a few!

Thanks for the encouragement!

smile xxx

InDubiousBattle Tue 26-Sep-17 14:37:46

We started ttc when ds was 7 months and had started to wake every 60-90minutes. We had a plan and we we're going to stick to it! I got pregnant when he was 9-10 months and I was knackered. We sleep trained ds at 12 months and it was fine, I love having two close together!

user1493212170 Tue 26-Sep-17 14:39:19

Thanks for the reply!

Can I ask what sleep training method you used?
I know it's going to break my heart hearing him cry but I feel like we may be reaching that point! sad

Hastalapasta Tue 26-Sep-17 14:40:50

My 3DC do not sleep until around 3.5yrs, 2yrs between each of them.
I am doing very well on little sleep grin

ElspethFlashman Tue 26-Sep-17 14:45:11

Yeah I just went for it. I vividly remember having hideous nausea during the months of him being awake and ready to party at 2am. A couple of times I had to race out to the loo to heave. A real low point!

But he was sleeping through by about 18/19 months and baby came a couple of months later.

Of course that baby turned out to be a poor sleeper too, but hey ho.

Frazzled2207 Tue 26-Sep-17 14:45:32

We did albeit not deliberately! Kids 21 months apart, they both slept fairly well from when they were 2 (thanks to controlled crying which didn't work until they got to that age). Was exhausting, but good now (2.5 and 4)

InDubiousBattle Tue 26-Sep-17 14:56:10

I started with naps as I found I had more patience and energy during the day. Up to around 9 months he napped either on me or in the buggy and I used ssh-pat or gradual retreat- I can't remember which is which! I would do a short version of bedtime (close curtains get teddy etc)then stand with him patting his back until he was fast asleep, then gradually started to move away as he was more awake until I could put him down awake. We then stopped feeding to sleep at bedtime but would give him his milk down stairs followed by story, teeth (well,tooth at that point!)and bed. Then we night weaned, offering water and rocking him/cuddling on wakings. Then we did cc for night wakings. It was quite convoluted!

Sallywiththegoodhurrr Tue 26-Sep-17 14:59:52

DD is nearly 2 and doesn't sleep through, some nights she's up 3 times and I'm currently pregnant with twins.

I had the realisation last night that newborn twins may actually sleep better than she does after a few weeks 😳

user1493212170 Tue 26-Sep-17 15:04:53

Thanks everyone

It's nice to know I'm not the only one with a poor sleeper!

The most frustrating thing is that he goes down awake, self settles but then waked continually in the night for boob- any nothing else will settle him

May give the controlled crying a try and see if it works. Hoping to stop breastfeeding but at the moment it's all that is getting us any sleep!

piglet81 Tue 26-Sep-17 16:44:56

We're TTC and have a 2yo who doesn't sleep. I'm permanently tired anyway so we're just going for it. Hopefully it won't be such a shock to the system a second time around anyway...!

DeadDoorpost Tue 26-Sep-17 19:11:03

My parents did.. I was the nightmare baby that didn't sleep. And then they had a 3rd while I still didn't sleep. Don't think they meant to have the 3rd that quickly but it happened. Both of us were fairly independent children though so we took care of ourselves and dad was (and still is) excellent at helping out around the house to let the mum sleep.

teaandbiscuitsforme Tue 26-Sep-17 20:56:33

I've got a 21 month gap. Conceived DS whilst co-sleeping with boob monster DD. We gently started tonight wean DD when she was 16 months and by the time DS was born, she was going to bed in her own bed, in her own room, without BF and for the most part sleeping through the night.

I'd say go for a smaller gap because at least the older one should still be napping and you can have a lie down whilst they're both still asleep. You can't guarantee some catch up naps if you wait until your eldest is 3! grin

user1488794856 Tue 26-Sep-17 21:05:59

Dd1 is currently still waking for at least 1 night feed at 8 months old....I am 3 months pregnant so will have a 14 month gap 😲

If a small age Gap is what you want then I'd just go for it!

Silly35 Tue 26-Sep-17 21:13:24

DS is now 9 months. And I'm 11 weeks pregnant. DS wakes 3+ times. I've cut down on night feeds in the hope he will stop waking... No luck yet!

DH insists DS will get better. (Usually when I'm in tears at the thought of 2 babies up at night!)

I'm glad to hear of the poster who said pregnancy+ toddler was harder than having a newborn +toddler.

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