I feel like a complete sh*t for even thinking it. But my children drive me round the bend and I don't enjoy them or spending time with them.
I've not admitted it seriously to anyone not even DH.
I have two girls 3 and 16 months. The youngest has allergies to egg, milk and soy and as a result is still breastfeeding and not just two or three times a day she's like a newborn, she's also still not sleeping through consistently yet.
They are both awesome I know that and I do love them but I just don't like spending time with them. I find it really hard to just spend time playing without trying to get stuff done! I'm find myself getting frustrated and shouty more and more and I get into this cycle of guilt for shouting and frustration with them! I envy DH because he gets 8 hours off a day at work but I do go to yoga once a week and exercise once a week to.
Im affectionate and always available for cuddles but it makes me think they'll need to have their head on a swivel as they never no which mum they are going to get!
I feel really alone in this as all my friends seem to have it sussed and have such an easy relationship with their kids!
Is there anyway you could afford help? Is your 3 year old in nursery? I homeschool my ds who is 6 and even I hate playing with toys. But we do play lots of other things. Arts and crafts, parks, swimming, boardgames etc. Is there anything you could do with them that didn't involve toys? Lots of parents hate toys haha!
I just feel so flat I haven't had an nigh away from the kids since my eldest was born! Although we are doing it for the first time this weekend. I can't wait! I'm hoping that will help.
I find it tough to do arts and crafts with them as they are so close in age but at different stages of that makes sense. But when my youngest naps we do play dough or crafting
I just find it all so full on all the time. They both go to nursery two days a week and I work those days. I'm freelance and live it but the problem is I want to work all the time and not just two days lol I want my cake and eat it I think!
I think that these ages is a really difficult time. Hang in there OP - I promise it will get easier!
I find it really hard to just spend time playing without trying to get stuff done! I think it helps to lower your expectations about what you'll be able to get done while you're at home with them. Accept that you'll only really be able to do the basics, and leave anything more for a weekend blitz!