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Not coping with being a mum

(15 Posts)
mumofzach Sat 27-May-17 14:38:10

I'm at my wits end today and am not coping at all with my 19 week old.

His sleep has completely gone. I have spent all day trying to get him to nap as he is clearly tired but he is just fighting me every time.

I tried putting him in cot, in the car seat, pram, on me and he just screams. He doesn't appear to be ill. He was full of beans this morning when he woke up.

He is also not taking his feeds during the day. I have tried him with 4 x 6oz bottles today and he has taken a max of 3oz at each feed. He did this yesterday and ended up waking for a feed 3 times last night.

I'm so tired and feel so rubbish I don't know what to do....

I don't expect him to sleep through the night as he is still young but he is literally getting no daytime sleep and his nights are steadily getting worse. I am an absolute mess!

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Sat 27-May-17 14:42:42

Is it very hot where you are? That can make them very out of sorts.

Have you tried a long walk in the pram? Everything seems better in the fresh air imo.

AssassinatedBeauty Sat 27-May-17 14:46:57

Could he be teething? That can put them off feeding. You could try a teething gel or calpol before feeding and see if it's any better. Have you tried doing daytime feeds in a quiet dark room to see if he'll feed better like that? It could be distraction that's stopp

AssassinatedBeauty Sat 27-May-17 14:47:10

...stopping him feeding.

hickorydickorynurseryrhyme Sat 27-May-17 15:00:08

Can I ask are you bf, ff or both?

Aquamarine1029 Sat 27-May-17 15:10:19

I completely understand how exhausted you are. Babies are emotional sponges. They pick up on every emotion their mums are feeling and that can totally disrupt their schedules. Is the TV on all the time in your house? That can add to their stress. I would put on some meditation music or some nature sounds (there's a million of them on YouTube), darken the house as much as possible, and then just make a real effort to deep breathe and relax. Shut off your phone and any other distractions. If it's warm, see if your baby might be more relaxed naked or with just a nappy on. I think sometimes we forget just how overwhelming the environment can be for a little one.

glitterglitters Sat 27-May-17 15:12:43

@mumofzach don't feel bad. Have a look at the four month sleep regression. You'll probably find he's probably teething a bit too. It's basically their brains rewiring and changing their sleep patterns. flowers Xxx

mumofzach Sat 27-May-17 15:32:18

Hi hickory we are ff


mumofzach Sat 27-May-17 16:17:08

I think it is teething as He has been dribbling more than usual and his dirty Nappies have been horrific. Poor little guy x

CrispyBathTowel Sat 27-May-17 16:25:04

You are coping and you will cope. Just take one day at a day and keep chanting to yourself that it will pass. You'll have forgotten all about this phase in a months time.

I found the 9 month stage the most difficult to date with my DD and I struggled and now nearly two months later I can't even really remember why grin

MrsMotherHen Sat 27-May-17 16:29:30

I know this sounds strange but have you tried changing to the next size teat a faster flow one? When my DS was around that age he gother very fussy with his bottles and wouldn't finish them and just give up as he was struggling to suck the milk fast enough?
Although it does sound like teething maybe give a little calpol and a nice cool bath then try a bottle after.

Mysterycat23 Sat 27-May-17 16:53:37

Another vote for Calpol and to go out and about for a walk with pram, if it's not too hot where you are.

Sometimes even though I'm shattered with 4mo DS I have to go for a walk when he's fussy, just to stop myself going absolutely potty. Had a good jaunt to the supermarket yday not to buy anything in particular but just to walk and to be in the air con, it was SO GOOD.

Don't be afraid to put ear buds in and play some music while you walk to give yourself a break.

hickorydickorynurseryrhyme Sat 27-May-17 22:24:49

My advice is to not get anxious about times, amounts, routines etc. Feed your baby little and often or on demand. If baby doesn't want milk then ok wait until the next time and try again. Let your baby take the lead. Sometimes babies get colic and can be unsettled but it doesn't last.

FATEdestiny Sun 28-May-17 08:53:47

tried him with 4 x 6oz bottles today and he has taken a max of 3oz at each feed

Make up 8 x 4oz for a few days.

It's not unusual for babies to want feeding frequently, as opposed to larger amounts. Try offering a feed every 2 hours in the daytime (7am-11pm).

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Sun 28-May-17 10:04:04

Good tip about a faster flow teat,that's worth a try.

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