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3 yr old 9 month old and pregnant again slightly worried.

(23 Posts)
ontono3 Sun 07-May-17 20:05:56

So as the title says I have a 3 yr old boy and a 9 month girl I'm 5 weeks pregnant again. This pregnancy wasn't planned a case of failed contraception. A little worried about the short age gap and yhe fact this baby is due on my sons birthday talk about timing lol. Not really sure what the point to my post is but would welcome some useful tips from anyone who has children with small age gap x

ontono3 Mon 08-May-17 09:42:53

Anyone?

chloechloe Mon 08-May-17 13:06:06

It'll be fine. You're probably in shock at the moment! I have 21 months between my two and whilst there is the odd horror moment where I'm on my own and both are tired and crying, it's generally easier than I excepted. Going from 0 to 1 was infinitely harder than 1 to 2. As you have two already you're an expert! Bear in mind that your now 9mo will be a lot more independent by the time the next one is here!

ontono3 Mon 08-May-17 19:00:57

Thanks for the reply I think it's more everyone else bothering me keep saying how difficult it will be with 3 and all the rest of the bullshit opinions.

Justmadeperfectflapjacks Mon 08-May-17 19:03:11

14 months between 2 of my ds and 15 between my dds. .
I have 2 dc share a birthday with 11 years between them!!
Congratulations!!
It will be just fine!!

BusyBee2017 Mon 08-May-17 19:17:03

17 months between my two sons. One is 20 months and the other is 3 months.

Sooner you get into a routine the better.

You are prob doing housework and chores in 15 min or 30 min bursts anyway. Split you housework over 7 days so you do a max of 30 mins each day. Do one organising task a day so you aren't overwhelmed. When I say organising task anything else you need to do which ain't house works.

In the morning I will take DS1 and DS2 to the park or mother and baby group or library or play area and tire out DS1 whilst DS2 is in a sling.

We then come home before DS1 is going to have a nap and he has a long nap which gives me some respite and I put DS2 to sleep at the same time so hopefully it will work out better if they both nap at the same time. Sometimes I will nap at the same time but you will not be able to do that because you have a 3 year old who prob doesn't nap now. But at least you will be getting 15 hours free childcare for your 3 yr old if you have not already so you can put DC1 in nursery.

Good luck

BusyBee2017 Mon 08-May-17 19:19:44

If I have not taken DS1 out in the morning I will take him out in the afternoon as soon as he wakes up I will have everything ready and just leave the house because I find it better to take him out otherwise occasionally in the afternoon he can be quite grumpy.

If I have not got anything planned for th afternoon I take him for a walk to feed the ducks. If he stays home he just get up to loads of mischief because he is so mobile! He walks runs, climbs on everything, jumps! U name it he does it!

BusyBee2017 Mon 08-May-17 19:24:25

Loads of people told me two so close together will be hard etc etc... I think I panicked more because of their comments! But I have actually found it okay.

My brother asked me what I did whilst I was on holiday?!?!?!? I asked what he meant ? He meant maternity holiday!!! I told him this ain't a holiday and it's easier going to work than looking after children

As long as you try and stay up to date with stuff and don't overwhelm yourself.

The main thing is that the kids are clean and fed!! If you can't do anything else other than making sure you are all fed and watered then leave it! You have your hands full so just concentrate on the essentials

ontono3 Mon 08-May-17 19:30:14

Ds1 is in full time school nursery they offered him a place as soon as he turned 3 in January so he's fully settled in to school life so will just be dd and new baby at home in the daytime at the moment she still has a few naps through the day probably 3 sometimes 4 put there only half hour 45 mins max so hoping by the time baby arrives she just has one big long nap that way I can get some stuff in the house done. It's mainly family members opinions that are getting on my nerves I'm not very good at hiding my emotions so when somebody sess something regarding this pregnancy or my life I just go off on one.

RandomMess Mon 08-May-17 19:33:40

flowers

How about some come backs then for family "Shall we discuss your sex life now?"

Do family actually help out at all? Ours never did so had they dared say much I would have given short shrift. The negative comments really do hurt though don't they sad

ontono3 Mon 08-May-17 19:40:08

My mum has them 2 evenings a week for 2 hours a time when I go to the gym and my son stays maybe one day a month if my neice is there but that's about it I don't drink or anything so don't really go out to be honest when my son was born in never let anyone go near him let alone baby sitting I was a bit like he's mine all mine but it was because I'd had 8 miscarriages before I had him so he felt like a miracle so I didn't want to miss anything I've been more relaxed this time around but I still don't like leaving them. My mum knows to keep her opinions to herself.

BusyBee2017 Mon 08-May-17 19:41:49

Yeah if they don't help tell them to do one! Or make a sarcastic comment back. If they do help then bite your lip.

DS1 used to have three 45 or a nap for an hour. When he was about 7 months the naps got a little longer and he dropped down to two naps a day. At 11 months he started to have one long nap in the afternoon and very occasionally a 5 pm nap if he was exhausted.

Try and wean him off the morning nap so he will sleep longer in the afternoon then eventually get him to stop the third nap and he will sleep for ages in the afternoon making it easy for you.
When bedtime comes round at 7 you will be able to relax and enjoy some me time

ontono3 Tue 09-May-17 10:22:37

It's hard to stop her having a morning nap because she falls asleep in terms car on the school run

ontono3 Tue 09-May-17 10:23:07

* in the car that was meant to say

BusyBee2017 Wed 10-May-17 20:49:08

That's great she still naps... respite for u

ontono3 Thu 11-May-17 09:20:30

Both of them sleep right through the night also which I'm so thankful for it means I'm not a walking zombie.

BusyBee2017 Thu 11-May-17 10:24:36

Yes that makes a huge difference... it will be a huge shock when new baby arrives and you have to wake up in middle of the night but as u know it's temporary. I've already started routine with 3 month old lol

BusyBee2017 Thu 11-May-17 10:25:14

Aiming to synchronise his naps in the afternoon when DS1 has his (which he does anyway) and put him to bed 7/7.30 same as DS1

ontono3 Thu 11-May-17 10:37:24

To be fair I've been lucky with both of them and the sleeping my daughter started sleeping through from 7 weeks old so we had a routine right away bath bottle bed just praying new baby will be as good wishful thinking lol

BusyBee2017 Thu 11-May-17 12:54:20

That's brilliant

Well you will be fine with the third

BusyBee2017 Thu 11-May-17 12:58:33

Bath bottle bed is a great routine..
in my case it was bath breastfeeding bed

The best thing I did was make sure he didn't go to sleep whilst on the breast and from 7 months he was able to settle himself to sleep which is a godsend now! DH is happy I did that because it's so easy to put him to bed

Bed routine for last 6 months is either
- dinner, desert, milk, bath, book & bed
Or
- dinner, desert, milk, book & bed

Nowadays he has squeezed an episode of telletubbies after milk!!! After finally getting him into a tv programme for respite now he loves telletubbies... not sure it's a great idea right before bedtime routine but hey he still settles himself to sleep...

ontono3 Thu 11-May-17 13:07:10

Aww bless him if it works for him then whatever goes I say. Children should always go to bed happy nothing worse then tears at bedtime I don't like the thought of them going to sleep sad makes for a bad night in my opinion my daughter usually rolls around for about 10 minutes in her cot befor falling asleep. My son is straight to sleep now talking or anything literally lights out they love there sleep though both of them will easily sleep for 12 to 13 hours straight I feel I am extremely lucky on that part.

WankersHacksandThieves Fri 12-May-17 14:00:39

I don't have 3, but I have 2 with a 13 month gap. It is hard work but not unmanageable. I had DH give up work and look after them before they started school - it made life much easier for me smile

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