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How to approach this?

(5 Posts)
samanthajayne17 Wed 26-Apr-17 10:41:34

I need advice on how to approach this situation. This child in my 9 year old daughters class ( call her child A) is very jealous of my child playing with this other child ( child B)
Child B lives on our street and we have lived here 5 years so my daughter and child B have been friends for a while. Child A and B have always gone to the same school but my daughter only joined their school around 2 and half years ago when I changed her to it so that's where my daughter met child A. So child A and my daughter are great friends with child B. But child A is very jealous of my child being close to child B. She often pulls child B away from my daughter trying to leave my daughter out. And pretty much trying to avoid my daughter and child B having a friendship. So they went on a school trip yesterday and my daughter told me that Child B sat next to my daughter because child A was travel sick so sat elsewhere and because of this child A was sulking And pretty much being horrible because of it.

So this morning we leave for school and on the door mat outside was a letter sealed in an envelope addressed to my daughter it had our FULL address and postcode in it which I found odd and the letter inside said 'sorry XXXXXX ( my daughters first name) XXXXXX ( my daughters surname!) I can't be your friend anymore sorry I apologise' the the letter was signed by CHILD A

Obviously my daughter was confused and I was fuming!! I don't know when she left This letter because she doesn't live on our street!! My daughter said she recognised it as child As handwriting so it was definitely her.
The mother of this child obviously just lets her do what she likes!!
In my eyes this is bullying and harassment. She obviously wrote this to as a warning to stay away from her which in turn makes her feel left out of the group with her friend child B.
The amount of complaints I get about this kid. How would you approach this. I will speak to their teacher as all 3 of them are in the same class but the Longer this child A is behaving like this my. Hold and child B can't play together. My daughter has nothing against child A and just wants them all to play.

NurseMama Wed 26-Apr-17 13:16:05

That's awful. Your girl must be so sad and distressed. I think it's right that you're going to speak to the teacher. Is it possible to arrange a meeting with A and B's parents as well? Unfortunately teachers don't always follow through with their supposed promises when it comes to the behaviour of problematic children.

Aquamarine1029 Wed 26-Apr-17 15:51:12

Why can't your child and child b play together? Why are you allowing child a, who is obviously a wretched brat, control what you do?

samanthajayne17 Wed 26-Apr-17 16:01:16

Thanks for your replies

I have spoken to child As mother she swears that her child hasn't left the house in a week so it can't be her who wrote the letter and it must be one of the kids who live in my street. So I don't know what to think. Either way if another child from my street wrote this letter they are pretty sick but what am I expected to think when child As full name with middle name and surname signed on the letter

Aquamarine1029 Wed 26-Apr-17 16:19:49

The whole letter situation really doesn't matter. What matters is that you teach YOUR child how to deal with people like child A. This won't be the last she has to contend with ridiculous people. Your daughter needs to know that child A's problem, whatever it is, is not HER problem. We can't control how others behave, we can only control our own behavior. Your child needs to be empowered that while they must remain polite and civil, they do not have to pay attention to any of the dramatics child A has to offer. Child A should be ignored, and your child should feel strong enough to be friends with whomever she choose to.

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