End of my tether!!!(21 Posts)
Could it be a developmental leap and he's about to walk? Or could he be unwell?
Don't let your DH get out of helping. Hace a read of 12 alternatives for the all night nurser. Tank DS up tonight if it's not too late. Lots of Bfing before bed, try him with something like oatibix and cow's milk? Can you express to leave for in the night? If DH can't settle him, could he take him out for a drive or walk to give you a break?
If DH is off tomorrow, make it really clear that he's to take all of the DC, including the baby, out tomorrow so that you can sleep.
You poor thing! It could just be developmental. DD1 did a similar thing at 8-9 mo where we had three hours of party time from 1am. Nothing absolutely nothing would get her back to sleep. Then it just stopped overnight.
Hang in there, it's a phase and you'll get through it. If your husband won't help during the night then insist on lying in in the morning and having the baby brought to you for feeding only.
Sammy - it's tough when you have a baby. I've been there and with 5 too (youngest is over 1 now). What age are your other children?
Can you sit down with DH and talk it through with him?
Do you have a playpen to put the baby in when he brings baby downstairs? That way you won't have to sit on the stairs worrying.
Have you talked to your health visitor or gp? You're mentioning self harm in a few of your posts and I'm wondering if you had PND on any of your previous babies.
Who How awkwardly inappropriate is your username right now?!
Sammy please get some support in rl. Are there any friends/family who could help. Have the baby overnight perhaps. You sound dangerously low in mood. Please reach out in rl.
what it's my normal user name. I do have 5 children myself and the name refers to me. I'd overlooked that it might cause offence here.
sammy apologies if it caused you offence.
Hey Hun, just so you know you are doing brilliantly even though you feel like you've hit rock bottom, you're a goddamn star!
My DS (now going through what seems like a months sleep regression @ 18mo) at that age was pretty much the same. I ended up becoming so tired I became quite unwell. My DH was the same, sleeping through it all, off to the gym saying it was his coping mech and working. I was often told it was my job and just to get on with it.
One evening I hit a fever whilst DS was doing is usual routine of not sleeping and screaming the neighbourhood down. I called a friend whom just came over for the night. Took DS in the living room and soothed him as best she could so I could sleep, she thought I would need the hospital but I knew it was the 2 weeks of little to no sleep. When he wanted feeding she gave him the bottle, he never used to take it but instead of hunger, survival instincts kicked in. Humans can be stubborn bastards but when push comes to shove that is what it is.
I slept the night through whilst she sat downstairs calming him, feeding him and finally he feel asleep in our travel cot. I woke at 6am just about ready to continue with life.
Sometimes telling DH does something sometimes not so much. Mine never helps even today so you're not alone with useless DH. Remember this though @sammyjayneexx you are wonderful and though you don't want to hear they all rely on you and you're the glue that keeps them together- you are. You've got all the power and are doing everything on your own. A hero! Take a break, write all your feelings out. Scream into a pillow if you have too- don't let your negative mind take over because if you haven't noticed, it's not you can't do this- you already are.
Put a mattress on the floor and sleep on it with the baby. You need to have the option to safely co-sleep when you need it. It saved my sanity with dc2 and 3 (dc1 was a nightmare similar to yours till he was 2, and insisting that he sleeps only in his cot didn't help).
Your baby may be teething, and feeling that you are next to him helps a lot.
You absolutely can take antidepressants while breastfeeding- I'm on 100mg of sertraline and it's a huge help for my anxiety. Also, my nearly 9 month old is such a fast mover but we co-sleep and I always wake up when he moves even slightly. As others have said, you could sleep on mattress on floor if you're worried. Co-sleeping is only thing getting me through this phase!
Sammy please go back to your GP. You also need to talk to your husband but maybe it would be better to do that when your on anti depressants.
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