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How do I help DS?

3 replies

raspberryblush23 · 06/04/2017 19:03

DS-8 has been bullied by 2 neighbourhood kids all day. For context, DS is a quiet, socially awkward boy with mild dyspraxia. He's pretty well behaved at school but can be quite challenging at home. When playing with 1 child it's fine but when the other, older child turns up inevitably they start ganging up on him. My DS isn't perfect but I've seen and heard it myself, backed up by another neighbour, and they've mouthed off to me too- no respect for other adults.

I know I can't change their behaviour but my DS just stands and takes it, or gets angry and of course that spurs them on. I was practically dragging the him in earlier but he just stood there. I've told him to walk away or tell them to shut up but he won't. He's so angry at us all the time but he cannot and will not stick up for himself. I'm not a confrontational person either so I'm not blaming him but today has been heartbreaking. It's always him getting picked on but he still wants to play with these children regardless. His self-esteem is on the floor: in his words he's not cool, scared of bees/dogs, doesn't upload videos on YouTube and nothing I say can reassure him. He's does martial arts for confidence but that's not helping either. I want him to be confident in himself and having the coping skills to shrug the teasing off. I'm really at a loss, does anyone have any advice?

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ohidoliketobebesidethecoast · 06/04/2017 19:08

Maybe arrange for a friend from school to come over, and take them out somewhere? Doesn't have to be expensive, a park maybe? Take a picnic somewhere, and a Frisbee or ball.
Some times the neighbourhood kids aren't a good match for yours, and as they're not your kids there's little you can do about third poor behaviour.

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ohidoliketobebesidethecoast · 06/04/2017 19:09

Whoops, I meant 'their poor behaviour'

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raspberryblush23 · 06/04/2017 19:22

Yes that might be an idea actually. A lot of the neighbourhood kids are his classmates however this particular child attends another school. I ended up raising my voice at him today- not shouting/swearing or screaming. I basically said 'if you wouldn't speak to a teacher like that then don't talk to me like that'. I've had 4 years of his behaviour and I've had enough. His mother apparently isn't happy so I'm half expecting her to come round later... Ive said to DS no more playing out this week but of course he won't listen as the're his 'friends'Sad].

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