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Unsure about nanny - good or bad?

(8 Posts)
catlike1979 Mon 03-Apr-17 17:17:42

Just had a trial with a new nanny for our 14 month old DS. She was lovely, kind and always observing our little one and responded to him when he turned to her, but was not as "lively" or animated with play as I would expect. I was in the background just seeing how things were going and at a lot of times it was silent for prolonged periods!

She is about to start studying to be a Montessori teaching assistant and when I asked her about her very calm, quiet way with him, she talked about this being part of the Montessori method.

The whole time she was with DS, he was calm, content and pottering around, she followed him. I suppose me and DH are both very "woo hoo" and outgoing, energetic and FUN (!!!) with him and she was just so not like this, I can't work out if her way is actually probably better for him and we should tone things down as parents, or whether she is just not the right person for us! When we are lively with DS he is all laughs and giggles whereas with her he was more considered and calm. Should I read this as her not stimulating him enough, or me and DH overstimulating him?

Does anyone have a Montessori-trained nanny? If so, how do they engage with your child? Are they more "hands off" and less engaging than you initially expected? I can't figure out what to do!

arbrighton Mon 03-Apr-17 17:47:05

It does sound rather as if she isn't a good fit for you?

Dozer Mon 03-Apr-17 17:48:53

Being observed isn't easy. Seems fair to give her a try IMO. If it doesn't work out you can always end the arrangement.

FreeButtonBee Mon 03-Apr-17 17:54:23

This is probably a patently style clash. I love the Montessori method and think it's lovely for kids to potter about and explore at their own pace. But if you want a more extrovert career then she probably isn't for you. Do remember that their relationship will develop as they get to know each other and there is a lot of fun and laughter in the Montessori method too -it's just much less 'children's entertainer'!

waterrat Mon 03-Apr-17 18:11:46

Blimey poor woman being watched like that! Trust your instinct but remember a 14 month olf who is playing happily doesnt need someone jumping all over them.

Its why i prefer a childminder at this age as ita more natural and a bustling family environment. I would nver follow a 14 month old around botjering them if they are content

CrumpettyTree Mon 03-Apr-17 18:15:57

Maybe it would be a nice balance for your son to have you doing the woo hoo stuff and her doing the considered and calm stuff?

Dozer Mon 03-Apr-17 18:37:58

Yes, a bit of variety!

Bloosh Mon 03-Apr-17 18:42:41

I would think it great to have a mix of styles. She sounds fab to me - no need to be in a toddler's face when he is happily pottering

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