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22month age gap between babies!?

(17 Posts)
BlueSpottyTiger Mon 06-Mar-17 17:01:45

Hiya, currenty ttc number 2.
DD is 13month. Since 22months is the smallest potential age gap (if im lucky) can anyone share their experience on having this age gap? How did/do you find it?
Thanks smile

MirandaWest Mon 06-Mar-17 17:03:53

I have a 22 month gap between my DC. Is fine so far (they're now 13 and 11). DS didn't really notice DD much when she was born and I was still in the swing of baby things at the time. Did help that he was a good sleeper.
And things have just carried on from there really.

HorraceTheOtter Mon 06-Mar-17 17:07:39

I have a 21 month gap. It was honestly fine. Would have been better if either of them slept, but they get on really well and will play with the same toys, enjoy the same books. They're almost 3 and 4.5 now. It was a bit crap when DD first started walking, but was unsteady, DS kept knocking her by mistake. Generally lovely though.

teaandbiscuitsforme Mon 06-Mar-17 18:51:36

I'm 8 weeks in to a 21 month gap. We're all surviving so far! grin

It's really not been half as bad as I expected, certainly not double the work. Even though DD did decide she was going to refuse all nappies so we've had to throw potty training into the mix as well!

Good luck.

BlueSpottyTiger Tue 07-Mar-17 08:58:31

Aww sounds great! Thanks ladies smile
DD isn't the best sleeper but you know what its like, you get used to the lack of sleep hehe
I have moments of arghh what am i doing!? My sister and i have 20months between us and i love the gap, She's my best friend!

coffeetasteslikeshit Tue 07-Mar-17 09:04:33

Mine have a 22 month gap. I was a bit worried at first as we'd originally planned for a 4 year gap (best laid plans and all that!). However, I'm so glad that we didn't stick to the original plan. My DC are much closer than I ever thought they would be, they even share a best friend who is exactly half way between their ages.
For me, I am really happy to have got all the baby/toddler stuff out of the way in one chunk of time, I can't imagine going back to that stage now.
The biggest problem we have is remembering whose clothes are whose as they tend to wear the same size tops!

MyBreadIsEggy Tue 07-Mar-17 09:13:09

My gap is a bit smaller - 17 months between my two.
The first few weeks are hard. All normal routine goes out the window, but once you find your feet, it's pretty easy to be honest! Everything will fall into place as you go along. The hardest part for me is helping my eldest to realise she can't have what she wants immediately if I'm dealing with the baby - I was feeding him this morning, and she was saying "yoghurt please mummy" on repeat until baby was finished hmm

chloechloe Tue 07-Mar-17 09:42:00

I'm nearly 3months into a 21 months age gap and it's generally been fine! We have two girls and the eldest is constantly kissing the youngest who already beams back at her, so cute to see. I hope they'll be close growing up.

There are moments of pure horror - usually when both are tired and the baby is screaming and I have to get them both to sleep at the same time on my own. But on the whole it has been easier than people would lead you to believe.

I'm already day dreaming about a third with a similar gap

Scrumptiouscrumpets Tue 07-Mar-17 12:02:10

Going against the grain here saying it's really hard. Mine are 27 and 6 months old and I'm finding it awful at the moment. The first three months were easy, a complete doddle compared to how it is now. They're both shit sleepers and the exhaustion is indescribable, it takes the fun out of nearly everything. I have spent the last weeks wondering wtf we were thinking.
That said, most people who have this gap but who are already out of the baby-and-toddler stage think its a great age gap, so I'm sure it'll get better....

Annarose2014 Tue 07-Mar-17 12:14:19

<raises weary hand>

I have a 6 month old and a boy 22 months older. I am knackered. Thank God the toddler sleeps through most of the time but he still gets permanent colds from nursery so does have weeks of waking up wailing and coughing and spluttering.

Oh and despite BFing the baby, he gives her all his colds so she has had recurrent bronchiolitis for ages.

But on the positive side:

Am still doing nappies for him so it makes no difference to do two lots of nappies rather than one.

When he regresses and wants a bottle cos he sees her having a bottle it's not a big deal as he's only really a baby himself - I give him a baby bottle with about 1oz of warm water out of the kettle and he's delighted with himself.

He has had zero jealousy. That's not really down to age though as my friend has the same gap and the toddler was horrendous to the baby but more I think thanks to him being at nursery I.e. having some "non baby space" with lots of other kids during the day and not actually seeing me prioritising baby whilst he just sits there. My friend has a live in Nanny and her Toddler was used to being King of the Castle.

Nursery has saved my life, I'm not kidding. I don't know how people take care of a toddler with a newborn who naps every 1.5 hours only on you, and manage to entertain a rambunctious toddler on a rainy day. Hats off to them.

BlueSpottyTiger Tue 07-Mar-17 12:57:19

I like to hear about both sides to this gap! So thankyou smile
I'm guessing no matter the gap it will always have it's pros and cons.
We don't have DD in nursery as i reduced my hours so my partner and i can share the childcare. So we would always be with the children... apart from work we would have no breaks but im fine with that.
I would much prefer to have a smaller gap than a bigger one as DD will be starting school nursery when she is 3.5y and i couldn't imagine doing a school run in the mornings with a new baby. I think that would be tough obviously that is just one aspect of it.
I do worry about bf'ing though as dd is still bf'ing quite a bit ! She wakes 2/3 times a night.. and is bf first thing in the morning around twice a day and in the evenings and i would want to bf the next baby aswell.. i do hope dd will wean herself off soon i couldn't imagine feeding two!! Im waffling on now haha... this is if im even lucky enough to have a second baby at some point.

nottakenpersonally Tue 07-Mar-17 12:59:10

I found it really hard work for the first year. Then it all gets better and they play together, are each other's best friends.

MiaowTheCat Tue 07-Mar-17 13:01:39

I think whatever the age gap you end up having, some will curl their noses up with horror at the idea but most will just have got on with it and done just fine.

For what it's worth the age gap between mine is 11 months (curl yer noses now ladies) and apart from the usual newborn feeling like you've been hit with a truck phase, it was fine.

Worst is that point where the eldest is running off all over the place but you're tied to the spot with a wobbly baby starting to walk but who won't bloody stay put while you try to remove the eldest from swinging from the light fittings... but that's a factor any time you've got an age gap on the smaller side. I was a regular at soft play at that point!

teaandbiscuitsforme Tue 07-Mar-17 13:07:24

Tiger I've ended up BF both. Didn't intend to and I'm going to stop DD soon but it's not been so bad. The first 2 weeks weren't easy with DD getting jealous of DS feeding and she asked to feed far more than she ever would have. But once she was used to DS, we got strict. She has a few minutes in the morning (in bed so I can keep my eyes closed!) and a very short feed before her nap.

I do feel like we're in the easy phase at the moment (23 months & 8 weeks) so I'm a bit worried by your post Scrumptious!

Annarose2014 Tue 07-Mar-17 13:48:44

I definitely found it harder as it went on. Baby slept really well for the first two months. But for the last four months it's been horrendous.

I have been awake since 3.30am today for example, as baby was thrashing all night even co sleeping.

There have been times I wondered what the fuck I've done. But am hoping it'll pay off in about 3 years when it gets easier, lol.

Chattycat78 Tue 07-Mar-17 21:29:18

I'm with Anna - 17 month gap here. Now got a 9 month old and a 26 month old. Am exhausted. Baby sleeps crap. Still wakes for feeds. Sometimes wakes toddler up too sadly. It's been v hard entertaining them both at once and the early days of doing a lot of breastfeeding whilst toddler wanted to run around were v hard.

I'm hoping the rewards will come later when they play together - hopefully!

I think the problem you have is that Mother Nature is in charge of these things and she decides what age gap you get. I'm sure there are pros and cons of whatever gap though!

BlueSpottyTiger Sun 12-Mar-17 18:17:21

Thankyou all, i agree chatty Mother nature will have the final say hehe x

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