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Did anyone give birth without DH/OH there?

(11 Posts)
Heatherbell1978 Wed 15-Feb-17 20:28:37

I'm 38+3 weeks pregnant with #2 and have a feeling this one will arrive sooner than DS1 (who was born at 41 weeks). My mum is on holiday at the moment (thanks mum...) who is our go-to person for childcare and is planning to take DS when I go into labour. She's back next week when I'll be 39+1.
We do have friends that could take DS if I go into labour while she's away although nothing concrete planned and they live at least 30 mins drive from us. DS was quite a quick birth so I've said to DH that first priority is me getting to hospital then finding somewhere for DS which could mean he misses the birth. We'd both be disappointed although him probably more than me as I'm quite practical and happy just to get on with it if I have to. Just wondering if anyone has experienced this?

DisreputabIeDog Wed 15-Feb-17 20:31:23

I very nearly did! DH arrived at the theatre 15 minutes before I was taken in for an emergency CS. I was okay thinking I'd be doing it alone but really relieved to see him rushing in at the last moment!

FraterculaArctica Wed 15-Feb-17 20:33:51

Yes, by accident. DC2 was a 50 min labour - I was already in hospital for monitoring as my waters had gone 24 hours earlier at 35 weeks. DH didn't make it back in time, we live 35 mins drive from the hospital and by the time the midwives assessed me I was fully dilated and ready to push! Was a shame especially as DH also missed the birth of DC1 (general anaesthetic for EMCS so he couldn't be in theatre) but OK. But with such a quick labour anything would have been OK as it didn't really test my coping powers, and I'm quite happy in hospitals anyway.

cocopops88 Wed 15-Feb-17 20:40:01

Yes mine got stuck in traffic, and arrived just in time to cut the cord, baby came at 36+3 so very unexpected and very quick! . I had my mum with meme as I had stayed at hers. To be honest she was probably more use than my husband!

Quartz2208 Wed 15-Feb-17 20:41:22

Yep a quick labour and a midwife not believing I was in labour (waters broke it was a Vbac so in hospital being monitored and it was outside of visiting hours) meant that when I finally got believed to go to the delivery suite he told oh not to hurry. He walked in as his head appeared so he did see it.

In retrospect it was a good thing. I literally had to stand outside the midwife station and insist I was in labour (he was born 40 mins later) and he might have tried to talk me out of it. The contraction was constant so I was in my own zone and the end I think was quite fraught (his heart rate dropped a lot so it was ventouse and if that had not worked foreceps! I was in stirrups lots of people milling around and I lost a lot of blood) it was easier doing it by myself, I did not have to worry about how he found it. So could just focus on me. To be honest it was all so quick I did not really think about it my priority was getting him out safely.

That sounds like what could happen in your situation given you have had a quick labour.

allthelaundrywecannotsee Wed 15-Feb-17 21:16:34

We were similar OP, parents lined up to look after the older DC's but then couldn't make it on the day due to something completely unavoidable. I had some friends as back up birth partners but they all had DC's and I was in the thick of it at school pick time!

I was induced and DH had to go home just as the drip was kicking in, DC was born while DH was at home making tea and putting the older ones to bed.

I was actually really well looked after, there were two midwives delivering and health an health care assistant who was happy to act as a sort of birth partner, all 3 ladies were utterly fantastic. There was a real sense of calm in the room...I loved having DH at the birth but he did tend to worry a little, there was none of that at all.

Selfishly the rest and the time alone with the baby was wonderful, DH arrived then next day after he had dropped the older ones at school and nursery...that all said this was the 4th time of doing it so I really knew the drill and the hospital.

The other thing was that I had my phone right by me, I was able to text (and I think call) DH right after the birth.

Sittinginthesun Wed 15-Feb-17 21:19:58

Yes. My second arrived four weeks early, DH was at a meeting several hours away. My friend took me in, and stayed with me. A second friend looked after ds1 until DH arrived, then he stayed at home and I texted him.

Was a very nice experience, to be honest.

uhoh2016 Wed 15-Feb-17 21:49:29

Dh almost missed it. I was induced he'd been sent home in the evening. Labour kicked off around midnight I was checked at 1.30am to be told ring DH as my waters were bulging and baby would arrive quickly after they went. Midwife wanted to delay breaking my waters to wait for DH but I was in that much pain I said to do it anyway. DH walked in at 2am baby born at 2.12. When I was in that height and intensity of labour I really didn't care if he was there or not.

Heatherbell1978 Thu 16-Feb-17 10:53:50

How did your OHs feel about missing it? As I say I think I'll be fine as I went into a bit of a zone with DS1 and just focused on getting baby out and of course it was great that DH was there but I had my own methods of coping which didn't really involve him which I know sounds awful! The thought of it really upsets him though as he really enjoyed the whole experience with DS.

allthelaundrywecannotsee Thu 16-Feb-17 14:18:27

DH felt bad for DC4 as he had been there at the birth for all of the others...they soon bonded though. Apparently it was like the morning that lasted forever though, he just wanted to have the kids at school and be done NOW so that he could get to the hospital, everyone was walking extra slowly on that day (or so it felt).

Sittinginthesun Thu 16-Feb-17 14:23:39

DH was fine - relieved, as he'd been terribly panicky when DS1 was born, and I'd asked him to leave me to it anyway!

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