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(24 Posts)
OttergavebirthonValentines Fri 16-Feb-07 11:09:36

are a big part of my life.

My children stink out the house and i have to tell them all to go to the loo. My daughter evern delights in them. My toddler grins and says 'Mummy smell Sumpin????'
My dp's main raison d'etre is to boff. The louder the better - he tells me down the phone if he has done one at work - trumps near me whenever possible and generally delights in his own gas.
I was on the phone to my bf (IN THE STATES!!!!) last night when DP let out a real bronx cheer and my friend was astounded . She has four children and said no one in her family trumped nor her DP. Trumps are not an issue for me she said and added that she would be furious if her husband trumped near her!!!
I cannot stop thinking about it. Am I alone in my torture and if so why?
Why have I got the Fart Family?

OttergavebirthonValentines Fri 16-Feb-07 11:37:37

i am alone in my stinky hell

OttergavebirthonValentines Fri 16-Feb-07 13:14:46


JanH Fri 16-Feb-07 13:19:07

Start again with the title Farts and you might get more of a response - people probably think this is about whist

OttergavebirthonValentines Fri 16-Feb-07 13:19:44

i wish!

JanH Fri 16-Feb-07 13:23:32

My DSs fart a lot and blame each other.

DH merely pollutes the bathroom.

All are silent but deadly.

pinkdolly Fri 16-Feb-07 13:26:50

Trust me you are not alone! I have 3 dd's. the youngest is 7 months, so can excuse her trumps. But the other 2, 4 and 3 think it's hilarious.

Daddy thinks its funny to fart into his hand and throw it around the house.

My dad thinks its funny to call the girls over, lift his leg and do the loudest most musical fart he can muster.

But then i'd hate to live in a family who were afraid to fart infront of each other. Its a natural bodily function - is it not!

OttergavebirthonValentines Fri 16-Feb-07 13:26:55

sadly no one blames anyone - they are more likely to take credit for a vile one they had not done

OttergavebirthonValentines Fri 16-Feb-07 13:27:57

pink dolly!! Wow yours sound like they might be good competition - i am sure dp will e delighted to read about your family and think you are fab!

wotsits Fri 16-Feb-07 13:34:29

My DH trumps in his sleep. They are vile, and they wake me up! He gets a hard kick and an earful of abuse then. And then he has to sleep with his rump out of the duvet
I dread to think what it'll be like when we're older... it'll have to be separate rooms I think.

shosha Fri 16-Feb-07 13:40:54

Message withdrawn

OttergavebirthonValentines Fri 16-Feb-07 19:06:23

you are making me feel better!

adath Fri 16-Feb-07 19:19:48

DP does it all the time and like yours I am sure is pretty proud of them, he has no shame about them at all and DD oh god she is vile and announces that it was her after every loud and smelly one she does. DS is only a baby but he is already showing signs of joining the "F" family farters.
I am beginning to wonder if I am abnormal not doing it as much/loudy/smelly as the rest of them or is it just the children have ds genes??????

OttergavebirthonValentines Fri 16-Feb-07 19:21:35

do you think it is a genetic thing? why are mine the waffers?

LIZS Fri 16-Feb-07 19:22:11

lol thought this was about the card game !! ds is very whiffy -his room smelt like a sewer last night ! He is at least embarrassed by it though

OttergavebirthonValentines Fri 16-Feb-07 21:36:03

mine are proud!

pinkdolly Sun 18-Feb-07 14:45:39

Lol at this thread.

After I posted on here the other day. My 3 year old came up to me and farted and used her hand to fan it in my direction. I nearly wet myself!

OttergavebirthonValentines Sun 18-Feb-07 21:37:59

omg that is good and a girl too!

SidtheKidsMum Mon 19-Feb-07 21:01:32

I had to have a c-section and you wouldn't believe the effect it had on my system. I farted all the time, anywhere. Any sudden movement! I can remember practically running around the supermarket. It sounded like I'd brought a brass band in with me. Ordinarily I'd have died but at that point I'd started to care less. Too tired.

I'm a bit better now. DS jumped the last time he farted and then looked around to see what had made the noise. He's going to take after Mama. Very proud.

OttergavebirthonValentines Mon 19-Feb-07 21:12:10

dp loved that!!!

eviletc Mon 19-Feb-07 21:20:51

pmsl at this thread...and trumps in general!

dd2 has, from the age of 5 months, looked up at me and giggled in a delighted fashion every time she drops one.

the older 2 regularly utter "what a corker" and just today dd1 blew her nose and said "that was my nose not a fart" in case we were all wondering....

CurlyN Mon 19-Feb-07 21:27:26

Better a empty house than a bad tennent! Try saving yours especially for bed time. and waft that duvet! might take the hint. as for DC My eldest told DP (who had stunk out their room whilst we were reading bed time stories, 'Daddy that smell was ghastly'. must have learnt that sort of talk in school.

OttergavebirthonValentines Mon 19-Feb-07 21:38:01

i suppose they cause some smiles!!!

pinkdolly Tue 20-Feb-07 17:33:51

I can honestly say that I have never wafted the duvet !

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