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3 week old

(25 Posts)
secretgirl Sat 26-Nov-16 12:21:18

I'm desperate for some advice on my 3 week old. She never sleeps. She has now been awake for 6 hours straight and we are both at the end of our tether.
She dozes off for about 2 minutes and then wakes back up. A lot of the time she will wake up with a shock.
Sometimes she'll suck her soother. Sometimes she won't. She seems very aggravated and angry all the time. She's very restless.
Sometimes she will cry after a feed other times she won't. Other times she stiffens wriggles and roars the house down.
It's beyond a joke at this stage, there is no comforting her. Has anyone any advice for 2 very tired, shocked and at a loss parents.

Symbista Sat 26-Nov-16 12:25:16

Have you tried swaddling? We used the special swaddle blankets with both of ours (the ones with zips/Velcro) and it really helped.

MrsPatrickDempsey Sat 26-Nov-16 12:40:41

This is really helpful.

ACubed Sat 26-Nov-16 12:43:59

I'd second swaddling - my sons arms used to wake him as they startle uncontrollably. Sorry you're having a rough time and good luck

Coconut0il Sat 26-Nov-16 13:16:49

When DS2 was a newborn we often took it in turns to sleep. One of you go to bed early while the other stays downstairs with baby, then swap. If one of you can get to sleep at 7 even just having till 12 is 5 hours. If this is how it is at the moment you need to get through it. It won't be forever.

secretgirl Sat 26-Nov-16 13:59:59

Thanks for the replies. I have tried swaddling. She goes mental trying to get her arms out, she frustrates herself.
We have a doctors appointment next week so I'll ask. The lack of sleep for her just doesn't seem right.

BikeRunSki Sat 26-Nov-16 14:01:26

Could it be reflux?

amysmummy12345 Sat 26-Nov-16 14:02:42

Check out symptoms/signs of silent reflux, crying after feeds is one of them, could you take turns to watch baby while other naps?

OnlyEatsToast Sat 26-Nov-16 14:05:53

This might be an unpopular suggestion but can you feed her rather than giving her a soother? Basics - is she hungry? Has she got wind/colic? Is she uncomfortable in a dirty nappy? Is she warm/cosy enough? Will she sleep on you or in a sling?

OnlyEatsToast Sat 26-Nov-16 14:07:38

Is she feeding well? Does she have a tongue tie? Can you call your health visitor for advice?

spacefrog35 Sat 26-Nov-16 14:15:12

If she hates the swaddle have you tried making a 'pod' for her? Roll up a towel, fold it into a horseshoe shape & put it inside a pillowcase. Pop her in the middle. My DD hated swaddles but needed the security of being 'cuddled' & this did the trick for her.

Youhaveupdates1 Sat 26-Nov-16 19:11:53

White noise?? It stops my 14 week old crying and really helps to settle him! I put him in his buggy and put white noise on my phone and leave it behind his head and it really helps. Being in the buggy also means I can rock him to help soothe him, he does seem to prefer sleeping in it.

My ds2 is a monkey for sleeping so you have my sympathy. He also only manages very short sleeps and then gets irritable as he is tired so it's a vicious circle.

Youhaveupdates1 Sat 26-Nov-16 19:13:47

Also as pp mentioned the comfort of being cuddled using a rolled up sheet underneath the mattress sheet, the midwife did this for my ds when we were in hospital and he loved it so definitely worth a shot!

Carta60 Sat 26-Nov-16 20:25:47

My DD was the same I was amazed she could function with such a lack of sleep. But she did start to slowly sleep more - she would sometimes have really sleepy days about 8 weeks where she would only wake to feed (in the day) nights were tough. But it has got much better (we are 19 weeks now)
We are first time parents and it knocked us for six having our DD. We love her to bits but the relentless 24/7 responsibility and feeling of lack of knowledge was mega. Is has got better though so hang in there and take all the help you can get. If your bfeeding it's tough but you'll reap the rewards x

Carta60 Sat 26-Nov-16 20:27:00

Oh and we got a sleepyhead pillow and she loves that and white noise too.

MaisieDotes Sat 26-Nov-16 20:30:26

Dark room, white noise (a fan or similar, but there's loads on YouTube) and rock her gently- just keep going, the repetition will eventually send her to sleep.

flowers for you- it will be ok.

Dixiechick17 Sat 26-Nov-16 22:50:15

My DD hated her arms being swaddled, but liked the rest being swaddled, so we swaddled with arms out. We also used to lay her on the bed next to our legs and once asleep we would gently transfer her to the crib, we did get a sleepyhead in the end which was amazing for us, but I appreciate this could have just been coincidence smile

secretgirl Sat 26-Nov-16 23:40:08

Dixie that's what I've done tonight. She's after dozing off about 15 times & waking back up after a few minutes. she also breathes so fast and shallow sometimes.

Thanks everyone for al the advice & support. It makes it easier 😀 X

InTheKitchenAtParties Sat 26-Nov-16 23:46:25

secretgirl my DD was exactly the same at 3 weeks. I know it is terrible, but it won't last forever. She is almost 1 now and sleeps 12-14 hours every night. Really!!
Definitely try white noise. It was the only thing that was effective for us in the early days.
Goodnight flowers

Potnoodlewilld0 Sat 26-Nov-16 23:50:20

Try again with the swaddling - dd used to fuss for a few mins but always settled down. Also try having her at a slight raised angle when she is sleeping. I've got a six week old thst settles brilliantly in a poco baby hammock.

Potnoodlewilld0 Sat 26-Nov-16 23:51:17

Yes dd did the shallow breathing I think it's normal - I used to judge her.

Potnoodlewilld0 Sat 26-Nov-16 23:54:35

Also I've never put dd flat on her back. It's not a decision I took lightly but after a scary incident of her chocking on mucus I won't do it so I've always had her on her side with support either side which she seems to like. I don't think baby's are naturally meant to sleep flat on their back.

It's hard isn't it brew

ManaFleet Sat 26-Nov-16 23:56:09

Oh OP, I do sympathise! One of my NCT Mama friends has just bought one of these: Her DS was startling himself awake constantly and apparently this sleep suit has magically turned him into a perfect sleeper. I'm holding out a bit longer but if my DS (5mths) doesn't get his sleep act together soon I'm going to try it.

Good luck.

ODog Sun 27-Nov-16 14:31:04

A good sling during the day (a stretchy wrap or a close Cabo for example) and safe cosleeping at night saved my sanity with both of mine. I've yet to meet a. Any that isn't instantly asleep in a good sling (provided all other basic needs have been met) and good day sleep normally helps night sleep too.

VikingMama Sun 27-Nov-16 16:36:46

We used to walk DD to sleep. Once she'd had a good few hours sleep, it reset the over tiredness and she would sleep better at night. She also used to sleep outside in the day time which really really helped...and yes, this was in Scandinavia in the winter.
A sling also helped her sleep and just letting her fall asleep on us, she didn't want to be by herself.

She was an awful sleeper and unfortunately, at the age of 11 still is. She needs melatonin to fall asleep and even then, only gets 7 hours broken sleep a night.

Try a long walk in the buggy, try sleeping next to her or letting her doze on you. Breaking the over tiredness is the key and then it will be easier.

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