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Dummy refuser??

(20 Posts)
freewheezy Sun 13-Nov-16 14:16:14

5mo dd has never really taken a dummy. That wasn't much of a problem until now.
I'm ebf and nights have become unbearable. She will not settle unless she's suckling. I've tried co sleeping but it doesn't make much difference. She's not feeding as such just using the breast for comfort which I don't mind in the day but I need to sleep!
I've bought different shapes and she refuses them all but she can take emb from a bottle.
She takes the dummy into her mouth but won't suck then just pushes it out with her tongue. If I persist putting it in she gets a bit frustrated so I stop.
Any tips/advice/experience? Please tell me there's a way!

onetwothreefournine Sun 13-Nov-16 14:20:10

Have you tried cherry teats? They're the only ones my children would take. Tommee tippee used to do 0-6 month ones but think they're discontinued apart from Amazon or eBay. I've seen the 6 month plus ones in sainsburys tho which you may be ok with? Failing that the really ugly cheap looking ones from £ shops are usually cherry teat. We tried about 12 shapes, brands etc before finding cherry teat.

Gardencentregroupie Sun 13-Nov-16 14:23:26

Mine never ever took a dummy. Screamed like she was being poisoned with every dummy I tried. I was exhausted, but the up side was not ever having to deal with taking away the dummy as she got bigger, which according to all my friends with children also resulted in multiple sleepless nights.

DillFunk Sun 13-Nov-16 14:32:35

I've had some success with the Nuk Genius latex one. DS2 is also 5 months and teething and seems to accept it once I've put some Anbesol on his gums.

Had no problem with DS1 when we stopped giving him his dummy.

freewheezy Sun 13-Nov-16 14:40:34

Haven't tried a cherry teat. Will give that a go. Does anyone have any ideas for settling without a bf? As soon as she comes off the breast she wriggles, throws her head from side to side and. Chews her hands (but wont suck her thumb, just rubs her face/mouth!)

Ratbagratty Sun 13-Nov-16 15:00:33

I have a dummy and bolster refused, now 10mnths. She has a comfort blanket with ribbons on to hold at night (half stuffed down side of cot). We have worked out we can sometime just rock her back to sleep, or gently rub her tummy while in cot to "remind" her tummy is full if she wakes soon after a breast feed. Could it be a growth spurt?

Hamiltoes Sun 13-Nov-16 15:07:13

Mines never took a dummy either. It could be that having breast as a comfort during the day means she is dependent on this at night too?

Would it be easier to take say a few days to "tackle" it during the day and then slowly start to work on nights?

I tried a dummy with both and they hated it, I didn't really replace that with anything though. When they got older they both had sooky type toy blankets, but were bottle fed by then.

freewheezy Sun 13-Nov-16 15:19:28

I haven't tried giving her a toy to hold at night I might try that.
Have tried tummy rubbing but she just gets herself so worked up if I don't put her on the boob straight away she wakes herself up and it's like starting from scratch.
Trying different things in the day when I'm more awake is a good idea smile

AmeliaJack Sun 13-Nov-16 15:21:11

Have you tried giving her your pinky to suck?

It worked really well with my two.

freewheezy Sun 13-Nov-16 16:27:13

Amelia yeah, sometimes it's enough but other times once she realises it not a boob she spits that out too sad maybe I should just accept I won't be sleeping much for the foreseeable future haha.

oldbirdy Sun 13-Nov-16 16:36:25

I had 4 kids; all breastfed, all took a dummy but it took perseverance on my part. Dc1 started taking at 8 months, dc2 at 5 months, dc3 at 6months and dc4 was almost 2 years old! I had to sort of wait till they were sleepy, and slide my nipple out and the rest in. Yy to latex cherry teats. Breastfed babies often dislike silicon as it has a very different mouth feel. I also had to hold it in for a while. All if mine found the dummies immensely comforting despite not taking them from birth, and all have them up easily within a month or do of turning 3.

oldbirdy Sun 13-Nov-16 16:37:49

Should say slide the dummy in, not rest. Bloody autocorrect.

freewheezy Sun 13-Nov-16 16:58:40

Birdy I've just done that and it worked shock she's asleep now with the dummy in. She sucks it for a few seconds then stops but hasn't spat it out yet!

ODog Sun 13-Nov-16 20:26:10

I have turned 2 dummy resisters into dummy lovers. For good reason - dummies are great. Both of mine were ebf and I too needed them to be comforted by something other than my boobs. Key is to give it to them all the time whether or not they need it and persevere. Just giving when they are looking for comfort/distressed doesn't help as they don't see it as comfort at that time. They have to learn it's comforting while they are already happy. I also had one that only took mam dummies.

MinisWin Sun 13-Nov-16 20:32:30

Seconding whoever mentioned NUK dummies - it's the only thing DD will allow in her mouth other than a nipple!

228agreenend Sun 13-Nov-16 20:32:56

Neither of mine took dummies.

ElphabaTheGreen Sun 13-Nov-16 21:21:56

DS1 absolutely refused all dummies and bottles, and was on the boob every hour of the night until well over a year, despite trying every comfort alternative and sleep-training method (gentle and not so gentle) in the book. DS2 took a dummy until exactly six months, at which point he absolutely refused them from that point on, but then a dummy never stopped him from waking every 90mins-2hrs anyway. He then decided to be on the boob every hour from then on, until about 14mo when night weaning finally worked (earlier attempts failed dismally).

Accept, and ride the mo fo out became my mantra. I worked full time with both of them like this as well, so I can assure you it's survivable.

They sleep fine now (4yo and 2yo) and have lovely straight teeth grin

oldbirdy Sun 13-Nov-16 23:30:43

Wheezy- suck then stop, suck then stop is the usual sleeping pattern. Hope you are getting some sleep smile

Alexandriaaaa Mon 14-Nov-16 01:21:40

I'd try to get through this phase without a dummy tbh, if it's at all possible.

HV advised we give DD a dummy when she was a newborn because the alternative was an extra ounce of milk (formula) to get her to sleep and the HV said she would be fat if we kept doing that. We were first time parents without a clue, and did as she advised.

DD is nearly two now. Runs all over the place so weight isn't an issue, but I can't get the damn dummy off her and its affected her teeth sad

freewheezy Mon 14-Nov-16 13:03:42

Last night was up 3am-6am sad
The only time I can get the dummy in is when she's asleep, and even then when she wakes up she spits it out. God I need a break haha. Thanks for all the advice. Maybe her refusing is a blessing in disguise for the future (hopefully)

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