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How soon after the birth did you go on a night out? Am I crazy to plan one a month after the due date?

(106 Posts)
ArialAnna Mon 31-Oct-16 12:40:39

I really wanted to buy my husband tickets to The Chambers of Flavour for Christmas. I'm pregnant with our first and due on 14th January. Ideally I wanted to get us tickets for just after Christmas, but the next batch just came on sale and the only options were too close to the due date, or afterwards. So I've booked the latest available (for 17th Feb), but now I'm wondering if that's a bit bonkers? Are we likely to be able to leave the baby at that stage with a babysitter for the evening? (probably my mum or my sister). I guess it depends on how we go with feeding and if the baby will happily take a bottle of expressed milk (planning to breastfeed but obviously have no idea at this stage how well that'll go!!) I guess it doesn't really matter, as worse case scenario is my husband takes someone else or we sell the tickets. But I just wanted to get some idea of how realistic it was. Guess I'm a bit worried about my husband's family's reaction (we'll be a their house for Christmas this year). My MIL already thinks we're crazy for booking a weekend away in early December (by train, no flying), so god knows what she'll make of this!

peaceloveandbiscuits Mon 31-Oct-16 12:42:59

Don't forget you could go overdue and only have a 2/3 week old.
At that stage I was hallucinating with lack of sleep and if I had the chance of a baby-free evening, I'd be sleeping.

OohNoDooEy Mon 31-Oct-16 12:45:34

We went out for the evening at 7 weeks with no problems. I stopped BFing at 6 weeks though but I suspect that even if you were BFing, giving bottles isn't going to do any harm.

You might not feel like it but you won't know until you're there.

MoMandaS Mon 31-Oct-16 12:48:09

I've never met anyone who wanted to leave their baby at that age, and certainly nobody who fancied going out for a night so soon after giving birth. Also it's not considered wise to introduce a bottle so soon if breastfeeding and the baby might not take it anyway - they want you, and they want you most in the evenings and during the night for the first 6 weeks or so. It's a biological thing. So yes, it seems crazy to me but maybe someone will be along to tell you different!

ShyOyster Mon 31-Oct-16 12:55:45

I only know 1 (ONE) person who went out so soon after having a baby. Her boy was 2 weeks old, she went on a Christmas night out. He was the easiest baby I have ever seen and bfing came just naturally to them. He slept vast majority of the first few months of his life, she just had to express enough for this one evening.
Each to their own. I was a total wreck at that time post partum.

minipie Mon 31-Oct-16 12:55:55

Impossible to predict.

Some babies hardly any are sleeping fairly well in the evenings at that age. Some mothers hardly any and not the ones who BF share the night wakings equally with DH and family or maternity nurses. In those situations it might be doable.

More likely you'll both be exhausted and would far rather sleep...

NerrSnerr Mon 31-Oct-16 12:56:03

Personally I wouldn't have wanted to do this. My daughter was feeding so much in the evening until she was about 8 weeks I would have been leaking all over the place if I left her for an evening. I was also knackered. I do know some people who went out really early though and seemed fine. I think you'll have to wait how you'll feel.

MrsRyanGosling15 Mon 31-Oct-16 13:02:45

MoManda never met me wink I was at a concert 3 weeks (post section!) Breastfeed baby, left some milk. Left at about 7.30pm home by 11.30/12 Fed the baby before I left and after I got home. PLUS the wee bugger slept the whole time and didnt even need the expressed milk. Each to their own, do what ever you want and dont let anyone make you feel bad whatever you decide.

TheCaptainsMum Mon 31-Oct-16 13:06:48

My first was born 15 days after due date, but yours could come early! You just don't know.

Would you be able to sell the tickets if it's not approprIate for your family?

BlurtonOnKites4eva Mon 31-Oct-16 13:07:03

Momander has clearly never met me either! I went on a full on night out, because friends who weren't normally around were back in town. It was amazingly cathartic after a horrendous birth and breastfeeding nightmare. It was the start of me feeling normal again. DD was with her dad and I exclusively expressed so she already took a bottle, I don't think we would have gone out together for the whole night.

BlurtonOnKites4eva Mon 31-Oct-16 13:07:45

Oh this was at 5 weeks.

Flisspaps Mon 31-Oct-16 13:08:39

I couldn't have done this with either of mine - DS was EBF and I couldn't have expressed anywhere near what he'd have needed as he was cluster feeding at about 4 weeks.

We BF for 9months but he was a bottle refuser and expressing was pointless as I got sod all even later on.

I went 16 days over with DD, so she'd have only been 2 weeks old at 4weeks past EDD.

Formula at such an early stage can cause confusion and impact BF.

However, SIL FF and would probably have considered going out very early on.

It's impossible to tell how you'll feel until the day itself!

29redshoes Mon 31-Oct-16 13:17:34

I went out for the evening when DD was four weeks. I think I was out for about 3-4 hours in total. She wasn't EBF though.

I think it's quite possible you'll be able to go, but I certainly wouldn't book anything non refundable!

MN does seem to have a disproportionate number of people who didn't leave their babies for a very long time - it seems more commin on here than amongst those I meet in real life.

29redshoes Mon 31-Oct-16 13:18:21

* common, obviously (promise I can spell really!)

MoMandaS Mon 31-Oct-16 13:19:33

Well done Ryan and Kites! I admire your energy and stamina! Much of it will depend on the baby's temperament, how you feel physically after the birth, feeding, etc. Maybe second time round I could have gone out fairly soon after if there'd just been one baby rather than two and no other children. Hard to say! Certainly couldn't with the eldest - went out for the first time when he was 6 months and had to go home after 2 hours because he was inconsolable. Anyway, as PP have said, you can't really predict I suppose.

OlennasWimple Mon 31-Oct-16 13:21:03

You might be fine, you might not! No one knows until the time arrives

Have a back up plan for what you will do with the tickets if it transpires that you can't go

NapQueen Mon 31-Oct-16 13:21:33

I think it's just a wait and see scenario.

Dd and I didn't take to bfing so we were on bottles by day 4.

Dh and I went for dinner 2 weeks post birth, out for about 2.5hrs. I then went to my works Christmas party (7-11pm) when dd was 5 weeks (she stayed with dh).

WhatHaveIFound Mon 31-Oct-16 13:27:56

It just depends on the baby. I went to a party 2 days after DS was born but took him with me as i was BF. With DD we went out about two weeks after she was born (wedding anniversary) but she was an icredibly easy baby and we were only 10 mins walk away.

Caterina99 Mon 31-Oct-16 13:56:34

Difficult to say. I had a lot of problems with bf so we were mix feeding anyway. DH and I went to an engagement party when DS was 3 weeks old. I had no issues with leaving him with my mum and apparently he slept the entire time anyway. Was only a few hours though and not very far away.

ricepolo Mon 31-Oct-16 14:01:17

If you're BF then you will be very unlikely to be able to go. Babies tend to cluster feed in the evenings (this does NOT mean that you don't have enough milk, btw, rather it's how the baby boosts your supply, since it's a supply-and-demand style mechanism), so you'll be very unlikely to get out the door.

Even if you do, I really doubt you'll want to. You will more than likely be beyond tired, still flabby from pregnancy (potentially even still bleeding) and the thought of putting on any clothes other than joggers may make you want to cry...

eurochick Mon 31-Oct-16 14:02:47

There is no way I could have done that or would have wanted to. I was still in mat wear and bleeding like something out of a horror film. My section meant I was super sloooooow. Feeding and changing the baby was a full time 24hr job.

Kokosjumping Mon 31-Oct-16 14:05:13

Way way too young to leave with a babysitter IMO. If you're breastfeeding will be impossible at that age, you'll get so engorged.

ArialAnna Mon 31-Oct-16 14:05:22

Looks like the feedback is leaning more towards it being a tad unrealistic, but guess we'll have to just see how it goes. I'm pretty sure we'll be able to sell the tickets if we can't make it, so we will have a back up plan.

Chattycat78 Mon 31-Oct-16 20:07:45

I've had 2 babies and breastfed both. Last week I had my first evening out since the birth of the second one and he is 5 months old next week. Agree with what others have said- especially the first time - I was so exhausted that the thought of a night out would have sent me over the edge to be honest!

Just a point however on bottle feeding- both of mine have been given 1 bottle per day from very early on. In my opinion if you leave this too late they often refuse a bottle and then you really are stuck.

waterrat Mon 31-Oct-16 20:39:52

Absolutely no way I cpuld have done thst. Newborn babies are usually waking frequently or awake most of the night and want their mums !

I think u will look back and laugh at the idea !

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