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should we have baby number 3?! Positive experiences?

4 replies

Kjjwales · 24/10/2016 10:49

Hi
I'm a mum of 2 lovely boisterous boys, ages 6&7. Number 2 was a bit of a surprise only 16 months between them, but they're great mates and after the initial shock I wouldn't have it any other way!
Now they're both older and settled in school full time I'm finding I'm really wanting another baby....and it's not going away!
I'm not sure if everyone experiences this as their kids get older (I cried at no 2s recent birthday cos I can't believe he's 6 😭😭)
I'm still relatively young (33) so theres no rush, but I worry about upsetting the apple cart of our relatively nice life for my own maybe selfish reasons? I wonder if it's fair on my other kids?
My other half is open to the idea, and I know if I was super keen he probably would be too-we've never gone down the permenant birth control route as neither of us could bare the idea of defo no more kids!!!
When I've read into this so many people have negative experiences, wishing they'd stuck to 2-re older siblings, money, car seats, holidays, childcare etc etc
Just wondering if others have found it to be a really positive family experience?
Sorry for long rambling post!

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tankflybosswalkjamnittygritty · 24/10/2016 11:40

I'm in exactly the same place as you so can't offer any advice but I know how you feel. Good luck deciding.

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Kjjwales · 24/10/2016 12:24

Thank! It's such a tricky one, I have friends that defo don't want any more kids, they wouldn't dream of it, but I don't feel like that at all!

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Helenluvsrob · 24/10/2016 13:30

Hmm tricky!

Happy mum of 3 here - all 3 school years apart.

I'd say first go visit /borrow a baby. Not a sweet cuddly newborn but a 9-12 month old or a just toddling todder...

Constant feeding /sleep disturbance and the challenges of a newborn are tough, yep, but relatively short duration and something you can defer your older children's needs around.

But the constant supervision of a nearly mobile /newly mobile, can't settle for a minute to do one thing, not wanting to watch the tv the big kids do, wanting to eat their stuff older baby. That's a challenge that last 6-12 months at least !

New babies are easy. older babies and all the clutter is not...

Also if you do go for it with the age gap you have, my bet is you'd want another baby soon and would effectively have an older family and a younger family. Otherwise you'll effectively have an only child. Maybe this'll be oK but maybe it wont...
This is a pretty common thing when you look at families of 4, and 4 kids really changes the dynamix re house sizes /cars/holidays etc!

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Millionairerow · 24/10/2016 13:41

I have 3. A great number.

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