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What does your child keep at NRP's house?

(8 Posts)
SoccerMom2016 Sun 02-Oct-16 15:03:53

Just curious as to what other people do?

Ds is 12 and lives with me, stepdad, plus 3 half siblings. Most weekends he goes to his dads and comes home with new clothes/games/books/whatever. Am I wrong to expect him to leave some stuff at his dads??

At the moment it's not suitable due to his dad's living arrangements but he'll be moving to his own place soon. (One bed so Ds doesn't have a room but that's apparently not my business). I would really like Ds to keep stuff at his dads, for him and to make his room less cluttered!

Last time Ds brought stuff back it was an Xbox (he already has one!) and loads of games which I don't like him playing anyway, and if I say he can't have it I'm the bad guy!.

So what I'm actually wondering is what do other families do? Do your dc keep stuff at the Non Resident Parents? Or should I just suck it up and keep the peace??

wheresthel1ght Sun 02-Oct-16 15:37:50

I have no idea what is normal but my dsd and Dss have a wardrobe full of clothes, a room full of books and toys. They prefer not to take stuff back to their mums and they aren't allowed (by her) to leave stuff here that is from hers.

ThirteenBastards Sun 02-Oct-16 15:44:56

My Stepkids bring over laptops and phones but apart from that we have everything else here. Clothes stay in our house or their mums house and don't go between the two.

SoccerMom2016 Sun 02-Oct-16 16:06:14

Now that's what I'd like, for him to have his own clothes and things at his dads, instead of having to take a bag every week.

Sparklemummyx0x0x Sun 02-Oct-16 16:08:26

My son spends approx 2-3 days/nights at his dads. He has everything there as well, it's like he has 2 homes. Basically, if he was at his dads, you wouldn't think it was his non resident home.
Me and his dad try to work around buying things so he doesn't get too overloaded. I've got stuff here that his dad bought and vice versa though.
But there are things that we don't like leaving the house, like the tablets, certain toys or clothes that maybe cost a lot. But things usually find their way back anynway eventually.
We generally have the same ideas on rules and discipline and communication is good between us. I know he has an Xbox as his dads, but his step sister plays with it too, he wouldn't let him play any games that he shouldn't.

StarOnTheTree Sun 02-Oct-16 16:09:24

My DD has nothing at her dads, maybe a toothbrush but I don't think so. She takes everything with her.

wheresthel1ght Sun 02-Oct-16 16:09:57

Sparkle that is what we wanted. It to be their home not somewhere they just turn up to every week.

SoccerMom2016 Sun 02-Oct-16 20:45:56

I want him to feel like his dad's is his other home.

If I don't remind him to take spare clothes he wears the same clothes all weekend, Friday to Sunday! He doesn't wash at his dad's either, and I'd be surprised if he's ever owned a toothbrush there.

I don't mind him leaving stuff there that I've bought him either, but his dad doesn't wash his clothes. I get those back to clean! (When he was a baby I supplied nappies for him to keep at his place, he'd use 5 all weekend and they'd be in my sons change bag for me to bin confused)

I think I'll do a big shop at primary for Ds so he can have some clothes at his dads (the last time his dad bought him clothes was because his now ex made him as she felt sorry for him) and refuse to wash them. Might even teach Ds how to use the machine!

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