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I just want to ask - first time mum and crying month old

(14 Posts)
fruityb Tue 27-Sep-16 12:55:38

DS is a month old now and as much as he's becoming more aware and smiling at us and such, unless he's eating or sleeping he does spend a lot of time crying. Sometimes it's just whingy but others he'll cry till he's held or he falls asleep or both. He's taking 6oz bottles every three to four hours and is perfectly fine. Wind all up and lots of dirty nappies. I know he's still growing and things will likely change soon, but is this normal for his age? He uses his baby gym and will chill In there for ten minutes or so but then the crying starts again!

Is the crying just what they do till they get a little more with it? If it is then that's fine I just want to check I'm not doing this wrong! He sleeps very well at night and can settle himself more and more.

Thank you smile

LaundryQueenHatesIroning Tue 27-Sep-16 12:58:28

Sounds pretty normal. Like he just wants to be held. Could you put him in a sling so you could get stuff done/go out? What is he like in his pram?

GoofyTheHero Tue 27-Sep-16 12:58:55

If my two cried it was usually because they were hungry or tired, so these are always the first things I tried. I didn't bottle feed so don't know how quantities work but could he want more milk? How much is he sleeping in the day? At 4 weeks mine probably did an hour happily awake, a feed and then approx 40 mins asleep, in a cycle.

fruityb Tue 27-Sep-16 13:11:45

He sleeps fairly well in the day - usually naps between 12 and 3 when he wakes for a feed and then will probably go for another nap after that. He's awake for a bit in the evenings and is quite chilled out then but will go down about 8 and wake for a feed around 11. Then he can sleep right through from anywhere around 3 till 7! He's great in the pram he sleeps usually when he's in there after a minute of trundling along. He doesn't stay awake very long without getting moany at the moment is how it feels! It's probably not as bad as I think but when it's just me and him it feels like loads.

I'm sure it'll change as he gets bigger but it can be quite exhausting! I'm also afraid I have my late mother in my ear from when my sister had kids saying don't pick them up too much. I know that's rubbish but it's always there. it's making me a little anxious as I don't want him getting sad and crying when I'm out and about. I'm trying to time doing things around feeds so he sleeps through them. I know it's never as loud to other people as it is to you but it's something I'm struggling to not think about when I want to meet people for coffee. I know he's a baby and that's how they talk to you, I just don't want to be the people with the baby that cries all the time!

Tell me I'm being ridiculous please!

Jenijena Tue 27-Sep-16 13:16:27

DS2 is a cryer. It is/was bloody hard, there was only a minute or two between sleep and crying. At about four months it got better but ohmygoodness it has nearly broken me.

He's 6 months this week. And as of this moment, I've just managed to successfully put him down for a nap...

fruityb Tue 27-Sep-16 13:25:26

He sleeps fine it's just the inbetween bits - is it just eat sleep cry? Is all I keep thinking! He doesn't rely on me to sleep - though how I get him to stop feeding to sleep I don't know as he just dozes off having a bottle!

ODog Tue 27-Sep-16 13:38:42

Google the fourth trimester. He just wants a cuddle which is totally understandable and normal for this age. Pop him in a sling if you need your hands but just hold him for now.

ComeLuckyApril Tue 27-Sep-16 13:49:02

Sounds normal, babies have a short attention span so ten minutes is good going. And of course they still need a lot of sleep at that stage so you don't get long after feeding and changing before the tired whining begins. We did used to get longer out of the vibrating bouncer at that age than the play gym, she found it restful and would fall asleep smile

ComeLuckyApril Tue 27-Sep-16 13:53:25

Don't worry about feeding to sleep when he's this little. But bear in mind at that age they should only be awake about an hour before napping again. Do whatever it takes, sleep really helps them.

Heloise1982 Tue 27-Sep-16 14:16:06

Sounds very normal. My twins spent the first four months of their life either asleep, or crying because they wanted to be asleep - they were phenomenally sleepy babies. It was fine in the mornings because they napped well then, but in the afternoons they struggled to get off to sleep at home, so I would walk with them in the pram for hours. As you say, pretty exhausting, and frankly mind numbingly boring, but better than being cooped up at home listening to wailing! I do think at that age, as long as they are still having regular feeds, they can't have too much sleep.

I'm afraid things didn't really get significantly better until 6 mo, and even now at 7 mo they overtire quickly and turn into bears if they need a nap. As long as I keep on top of the sleep, though, they are happy smiley little people. Hang on in there, it will pass!

fruityb Tue 27-Sep-16 14:16:39

Thank you everyone I feel much better now! I suppose it's because I haven't been around a small person this much ever. It's only been visiting others so I feel very aware of him crying as I've heard it lots that day! I love cuddling with him - and he falls asleep on me quite easily.

I'll stop worrying then. And I'll look up fourth trimester smile

LeopardPrintSocks1 Tue 27-Sep-16 14:17:49

So only 2 naps at 1 month old? Did I read that right?

sianihedgehog Tue 27-Sep-16 14:20:46

Sounds normal. Mine was either unhappy or unconscious pretty much all the time he was off the boob at first. I have no idea about bottle fed babies, but if he cried I changed his nappy, held him, and fed him, and then he went to sleep.

fruityb Tue 27-Sep-16 14:24:40

Sorry not quite lol. Naps are usually somewhere around:
Between 8 and 10 ish if feeding around seven as he usually does then another feed at 11.
Nap between 12 ish and 2ish - feed at 3. Then he will usually sleep through till around six or seven. Another feed - sleep till around 11 then another feed then often goes through till morning.

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