Toddler behaviour. Struggling to know when to let it go.(5 Posts)
DD will be 2 in a few months, and so far we have got off very lightly with any challenging behaviour. She is quite cheeky and finds it very funny to do things which she knows are 'naughty' or not allowed (though we don't tend to use that word) for example throwing things on the ground or running away when we are trying to get her dressed.
What I am struggling with is how to set clear boundaries so she knows what behaviour is expected of her (understanding that what I can reasonably expect from a child her age is going to be limited). She enjoys these 'games' so much that it's hard not to engage with her in the game and laugh along, and I would rather resolve things playfully if I can, but there are times when things need to be done quickly and I am worried I am confusing her by this behaviour being ok sometimes but not others? If that makes sense? Doesn't help that I am 13 weeks pregnant so already looking ahead to a time when I will be a lot less physically capable of chasing after her armed with a t-shirt!
Am I overthinking this? On the one hand she does seem to know to an extent what behaviour is and isn't ok as that is the whole basis for her cheeky games, but on the other hand I can see how confusing it would be for her if my reaction is not consistent. Any thoughts on navigating this?
I have two very different voices, the fun one and the STERN one. It is very clear when I am stern that it is not time for playing. I use it very infrequently so much that sometimes one 'no' can result in tears.
I do make a conscious effort to play those silly games and kid around spending half an hour getting dressed but not when there is any time pressure obviously!!
Thanks for responding Katy. Think I need to work on my 'mummy means business' voice as on the few occasions I have tried it she has tended to laugh I'm not really a shouter
although come back to me on that once I have tried managing a toddler and newborn for a few months but I do think there is a tone you can use to convey the message.
I have two children - 4 and 2 years. I remember getting very stressed about getting the older one dressed when he was that age - but now the 2 year old seems like such a baby to me, I can't believe I got worked up about her behaviour. When she needs to get dressed and is being silly I just grab her, pull the clothes on and it's done! If she makes a massive fuss then I let her wear what the hell she wants within reason.
They are so young - I would let them play silly games as much asthey like - and just step in and be firm when stuff has to get done. YOu don't need to tell them off or be stern - I look back and can't believe I used to get cross with a 2 year old. really it's like gtting cross with a fish! and about as likely to get a result! haha.
Haha I like that analogy watterat. Thanks for giving me a new perspective from someone who's been through it! Just need to relax I think. I hadn't thought too much about it and then suddenly started wondering if I would suddenly turn round and realise I had raised a terror because I hadn't been firmer about the small things.
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