Okay, please help, either i am completely on the right page or i need to eat me some humble pie.
H and I separated probably around a year ago but he only moved out a couple of months ago. I earn a lot more than him and bought him out of family home, he is renting a flat.
We have one DD who is 4.
He is a low earner and as such is eligible for benefits. I am not, I earn too much.
He came over last night and asked me to sign over the child benefit to him so that he could prove to the benefits office that he has a dependent which would make him eligible for more benefits. Financially this would not affect me. I said I wanted time to think about it and research the implications. I read loads of websites and saw that he would be the resident parent (he is not) in the eyes of the law and that he could potentially claim maintainance from me, could apply for a passport etc. I rang him and said no, I wouldn't be doing this.
He turned up at my house and called me a selfish cunt. He has said I am stopping him from properly caring for his daughter if i dont do this as he had worked out his finance based on him getting these benefits.
Financially, handing over the child benefit would not affect me, but obviously he would gain other rights. He argued that as her dad he should be trusted with those rights and that he has to accept that I won't get her a passport and take her away or claim maintainance from him so what's the difference. I suppose he has a point.
WWYD? Am I being unfair not putting it in his name?
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I'm pretty sure I am doing the right thing but exH knows exactly how to make me doubt myself
31 replies
ilovehalloumi · 17/09/2016 10:19
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