Tell me some success stories about "average" not particularly motivated DC

(6 Posts)
OpenMe Tue 30-Aug-16 21:21:20

All my friends and everyone on here seems to have either gifted, driven children or children with specials needs. Most days I consider myself fortunate to have "average" children but I am also prone to worrying and I do worry how things will turn out for them.

e.g. DS1 is going into year 11. He's not thick and he does the work that's set but he's not going to volunteer to do extra IYSWIM. He should hopefully come out with a good handful of Bs & Cs at GCSE. He loves cadets but nothing else gets him fired up. He's not passionate about sport, music, art, anything. I can't see where the passion or drive that's required to be successful is going to come from. He's not at all motivated by money or material things.

Do you have adult children who found it later in life? Please don't tell me he'll be great in the Army. ATM neither he nor I want that, but I can see it happening simply because he can't think of anything else to do.

wheresmybloodygreencard Tue 30-Aug-16 21:27:13

Hello.
I left school at 15 with Bs and Cs. I took no extra. I wasn't, and to be honest am still not, motivated by either of those things. All I ever wanted was to be happy.

I'm one of the two success stories from my year at school. I'm so sorry if that sounds like a brag. I just wanted you to know its not all about being 'G&T'. I had no idea what I wanted to do, career-wise, until I was 27 and went to university as a mature student. Before then I travelled, working all sorts of random jobs to see what I liked.

Being bright and kind is the way to go. He'll find his way xx

user1471098628 Tue 30-Aug-16 21:28:25

I have a family member who works in a factory. He makes cardboard cups. Everyone takes the piss even though they've been unemployed for years

He's on £52k a year and is happy as Larry doing it. Worked his way up from the bottom, he enjoys it,the production and management side. But the passion developed over time for him when he saw the salary increases on offer

He's only young, but he's a good lad. Does what needs doing, not lazy but he's hardly Mr Motivated either.

Not being motivated by material things or money can also be a key to happiness if not success.

Bloopbleep Tue 30-Aug-16 21:41:47

At school I was a lazy straight C student and it was suggested I join the army even tho I was a vocal pascifist. Teachers told me I was thick and broke every dream I had. I went to uni as a mature student and then returned again to become a straight A law student on the graduate degree. I don't really think kids should have to pick a future at 16-18 and I think they should take a few years out working or travelling before uni - especially now that uni is really pushed as a route to work rather than about learning. Academically I've done well when I was told I wouldn't.

One brother barely passed an exam and never went to college or uni but he has the gift of the gab. He earns a fortune doing what he loves in an dream industry mostly full of grads but he's their boss. Who you are as a teen can be radically different to who you end up as.

OpenMe Tue 30-Aug-16 22:06:23

Yes, on my more positive days I know it will work out well for him. He is kind and seems to be able to get on with people without being loud or gregarious. People seem to like him and he's quietly confident.

I think it's very tough that such seemingly important decisions about their future have to be made so young

user1471098628 Tue 30-Aug-16 22:20:16

I think it's very tough that such seemingly important decisions about their future have to be made so young

I know loads of cool people who bumbled along in their teens and early twenties, found their calling and either changed career or start studying something completely new. Rather than seeing this age as his "big chance" see it as his first attempt at finding himself. He'll get lots more chances provided he doesn't slam too many doors as he moves on.

He sounds lovely. Likeable and quietly confident is always a good combination.

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