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Not dry at night age 6 (nearly 7)

(18 Posts)
Flossynoodle123 Tue 23-Aug-16 22:51:50

DS was fully toilet trained by 3. He has never been dry at night.
He has no liquids for 2 hours before bed and does a wee last thing.
I tried lifting him at 10pm but gave up nearly 3 years ago as it made no difference apart from disrupting his sleep.
Neither of us are remotely bothered. He knows he does 7 dry nights and he'll be out of pull ups.
The Father (who left when he was a newborn) has now complained to Social Services that he's still in pull ups. Just yet another abuse tactic. Whatever. SS are entirely unconcerned. However, to cover myself, I asked the GP for e mail advice explaining that I have done all of the above and explaining that I didn't want to cause DS embarrassment by discussing it in front of him. He now wants me to attend with DS and a urine sample. I think this will cause DS distress. The Father doesn't put him in pull ups and he pees in the bed every night! This isn't bed wetting - he's never been dry at night. I think I've done all I can and that time will sort the problem without the need for fuss. I think the Father and the GP are risking causing distress. Does anyone have any experience of this? Thank you.

SlightlyperturbedOwl Tue 23-Aug-16 22:56:16

Yes my DS2 is 7 and a half and never been dry at night but he has no specific problems related to it otherwise. I've read lots of scientific literature on it and it seems he's just at the extreme end of normal. In fact I recently discovered quite by chance that 2 others in his class are the same. It's just no one talks about it. One day (hopefully soon as he wants to go to cub camp last year) it will just fix itself. Good luck flowers

SlightlyperturbedOwl Tue 23-Aug-16 22:57:49

Have you found the ERIC website? It's very helpful. (Try googling ERIC)

user703749 Tue 23-Aug-16 22:59:37

yeah my ds was 9 before he stopped bed wetting, he was such a heavy sleeper and didn't realise. Although he wasn't wetting the bed every night he grew out of it. best of luck

Etak15 Tue 23-Aug-16 23:01:37

I've just got my just turned 4 yr old dry at night and I think the answer is to get rid of the pull ups! My older dc were dry at night maybe 2/3 ish, when I tried it with her at this age she was just wetting the bed sometimes twice a night, with a newborn at the time and already up lots in the night I took the easy option and put a nappy back on at night! I think in her case she was weeing because she knew she had a nappy on so was quite happy to do so instead of getting out of bed! I bought some disposable bed mats on (damage limitation!) and just stopped putting a nappy on - only took about 3 nights of wet beds for her to now realise that you have to get up for the toilet when you need a wee!! Although she can't seem to manage this on her own - wakes me up to take her grin but we're getting there! Last night she didn't wake up for the toilet and stayed dry.

Flossynoodle123 Tue 23-Aug-16 23:07:01

Thank you for the link to ERIC - I will look it up. DS has just had 14 nights with his father without pull ups and peed in the bed every night so removal of pull ups isn't the answer. Believe me - if i had ever thought it would be i would have tried it so save the money and bin space if nothing else! I think from what friends have said that girls tend to be dry at night way before boys - hormonal more than anything.

SlightlyperturbedOwl Tue 23-Aug-16 23:07:04

Etak I'm glad it worked for you, but we had a week of soaked beds and a distressed child awake at 5am with raw skin from waist to toe from the wee. My DS sleeps so heavily he doesn't wake at all. It's a developmental thing to do with bladder sensation connecting to the waking impulse. It's not uncommon, every child is individual with this. The research figures state 10% -15% still aren't dry at night at 7. Boys are more likely to be in this group than girls.

SlightlyperturbedOwl Tue 23-Aug-16 23:08:42

I know what you mean. Every pack of pull-ups I buy I hope is the last. One day...

Haudyerwheesht Tue 23-Aug-16 23:09:02

Ds wasn't dry at that age them about 2 weeks after his 7th birthday he just was and that was him for good. Don't worry about it too much .

redsky21 Tue 23-Aug-16 23:09:18

The gp appointment won't be particularly distressing, most likely they will ask a few questions and refer to an enuresis clinic.
Whilst it's not unusual to still be wet at that age, there are other things that you can do to help, eg making sure he's drinking enough in the day time, getting into a good toileting routine etc. Some children do just need time but others will need a little more than that.

Ningnang2000 Tue 23-Aug-16 23:09:31

ERIC was really useful and dispelled a lot of bed wetting myths. His body is just not making the chemical that is released that stops him peeing at night yet. It will develop eventually. My dd became dry at age 6.5. We had been using desmomlet tabs as the pull up just weren't holding enough snd she was soaking the bed every night we used them for 6 months and she was eventually dry.

If you don't want to try that try bladder training ie encourage him to drink loads of water to stretch his bladder so it holds more and his body gets used to holding more

Don't be discouraged and suggest to your ex he read the info on ERIC too x

eyebrowsonfleek Tue 23-Aug-16 23:16:44

As people have explained totally not unheard of for a 7 year old not to have the hormone that stops him peeing at night. If it was unusual, pyjama pants would be on prescription or the Internet rather than any supermarket or high street chemist.

I'd be worried about the ex forcing your son to sleep every night without a nappy. It can't be doing his confidence any good to wake up wet when you know that your father wants you to be dry. sad

Flossynoodle123 Tue 23-Aug-16 23:24:09

Thanks for the well meant advice but DS drinks enough in the day (squash at meal times, water always available at other times and he is reminded to sip occasionally). No drink for 2 hours before bed. Water available by the bed but he sleeps like a log so its never drunk. Not sure what a good toileting routine is! He goes when he needs to, no accidents for some years and he is made to do a big wee last thing before bed. I'm happy I've done all i can but would be genuinely interested to hear if my drinks/toilet regime is at fault. Thank you.

Haudyerwheesht Tue 23-Aug-16 23:48:44

You say he has squash - avoid black currant that can make things much worse.

Also try and get him to drink LOADS during the day as it will increase his bladder capacity.

Littlefish Wed 24-Aug-16 00:17:18

I would drop the squash and encourage more drinking of water both at meal times and throughout the day. If he's only drinking squash at mealtimes and occasional sips of water in the day then he may not be drinking enough.

Ningnang2000 Wed 24-Aug-16 00:27:27

I forgot about blackcurrant. That and fizzy drink irritate the bladder. I agree with haudyerwheest about the drinking loads water. It's not a case of hydration it's a about the bladder getting trained to hold more. Dc was going through 4 refills of her water bottle at school at one point over and above normal liquid intake. The other thing about bladder training (which is an actual thing) is not to stop water before bedtime. It goes against your instinct but drinking is encouraged all the time. The guidance I read was to encourage a big pee at bedtime and then after books make dc get up and expel any further water . The bladder gets emptied and the child gets used to getting up from a warm snuggly/sleepy state to go to the loo.

Flossynoodle123 Wed 24-Aug-16 00:42:29

He doesn't have blackcurrant. Squash at mealtimes only for the sake of teeth, no fizzy drinks apart from a bit if someone else is having one (like once a month), sips of water throughout the day plus glasses of water when thirsty means at least a litre daily plus 300ml milk.

SchnitzelVonKrumm Wed 24-Aug-16 00:52:20

My DS is 7 next month and had never had been remotely dry overnight until May. He stopped one night and has been dry ever since. His sister was the same. They don't have the hormone then suddenly they do.

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