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Daughters 'friend' being mean and nasty

(4 Posts)
rainyspells Fri 05-Aug-16 09:19:44

Hi, looking for some advice.

DD is 7 and has this friend who lives in the next street. They've been friends since nursery - not best friends but have always got on fairly well.

DD's friend lives next door to a girl who is a couple of years older and when DD and friend are playing and this girl turns up, DD's friend starts being mean to DD. I think she is influenced by older girl. (But not entirely because she has been a bit like this in school too).

Once DD came home upset because older girl said she looked like a baby with her pigtails in and that 'friend' was laughing along with older girl. Yesterday DD was playing with a different girl in our street, 'friend' came down and played with them too. Last night when tucking DD into bed, she told DH and I that this 'friend' had said that the other girls' holiday braid was "much nicer and prettier than DD's, no offence" angry

I know it's all very petty but it's starting to really bother me. When 'friend' has no one to play with I.e older girl next door, she will come in for DD but I don't really want them playing together if she is just going to be so mean. It's a tough one though as DH and I get on very well with her mum and dad and our sons get on well too.

Any thoughts or suggestions on how to approach this would be great.

CinderellaFant Fri 05-Aug-16 09:27:17

No advice but it would really bother me too. Is there no one else your DD can play with and try and discourage the friendship with this other girl?

OhtoblazeswithElvira Fri 05-Aug-16 09:29:09

Watching this as DD has the same problem with a "friend".

They are only 5 sad and so far it has all been going way over DD's head. The "friend" is always careful of saying her nasty little comments out of earshot of her mum (who probably needs a whole separate thread hmm) so to some extent she must know what she's doing is not right.

So far I've only been able to come back with a feeble "that's not very nice, is it?" But like you OP I think there must be an effective way to approach this and I'd love to hear about it!

plipplops Sun 07-Aug-16 14:27:01

Can you hang about (doing some gardening or something?) next time they're playing, and if you near anything say something to the older girl "that's not very kind" etc?

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