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Struggling

7 replies

MessyBun247 · 30/05/2016 13:06

Does anyone know of a good helpline number I could use, everything is really really getting on top of me at the min.

I've posted recently about my high needs baby, bottle refuser, hates the pram, hates car seat (so I can't really go anywhere further than 5 mins away). I carry her round all day and co sleep at night, she only really naps in my arms. So I really can't get a break at all. She was very sick at 4 weeks old, ended up in ICU but recovered within a week and has been fine since. But I have very bad anxiety about her health. She had a cough and cold at the minute and was up a lot crying last night with a temp. So I'm really shattered. When she cries my anxiety goes through the roof.

Went to the doctor about 4 weeks ago who said she would refer me for counselling but have yet to hear anything back.

The house is never really tidy as I can't put her down, I constantly look and feel a mess as I have to get ready really quickly, my other DD who is almost 11 is barely getting any attention from me.

I just feel like I can't breathe a lot of the time. My mum is away on holiday for 2weeks and she really is my rock. And DD1 is going away on a school trip tomorrow until Friday, will really miss her.

Really need someone to talk to. Partner is crap when I'm like this, says I need to calm down which really doesn't help. Sitting at the park now in the sunshine watching everyone smiling and laughing and I'm just trying not to cry.

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MessyBun247 · 30/05/2016 15:17

Anybody Sad?

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jennifer86 · 30/05/2016 17:07

Hi. It can be really difficult when your support goes away for a few weeks. I'm really close to my mum, as well, and I remember finding it hard when she was away, when I was on maternity leave, although I don't have the anxiety that you've written about. From reading your post, I think it would be worth going back to your GP. I googled a few websites it might be worth looking at, although I don't have experience of using them myself. How old is your baby? If they're young and it's colic then I've heard //www.cry-sis.org.uk is helpful. If they're a bit older then you could have a look at www.mothersformothers.co.uk/links.html which had info about phone support lines. Sorry I'm not sure how to do links but if you copy and paste the addresses it should work.

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Timetogrowup2016 · 30/05/2016 17:08

Hiya.
I'd be willing to chat if you wanted to.
I have a 3.5 month old and am struggling to

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MessyBun247 · 30/05/2016 21:19

Thanks for the links, will contact the support line. DD is 4months. Just a bit of a tricky age, wants to be doing everything but isn't mobile yet so gets very easily bored and frustrated. Spend my days trying to keep her happy.

Have calmed down a bit, just wish mum was here Sad.

timetogrowup2016 Yes that would be good. Is there a way to message on here?

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LostInMess · 30/05/2016 22:18

My sympathies, no advice but know how you feel. DC4 was exactly like this, especially in car seat and buggy which made school run for other 3 a nightmare. He spent most of 1st 6 months in a stretchy wrap. Since he started rolling (c 2 months ago, now 8 months old) he has been SO much happier to be put down and is also much happier now he's forward facing in buggy and a bit more alert in car. We still co-sleep and the house still looks like a bomb's hit it, but small steps. Still knackered but used to that - but am at least managing to enjoy the baby a bit more rather than feeling hideously stressed all the time (just some of the time, now Smile).

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JuxtapositionRecords · 30/05/2016 22:25

Oh Messy, I remember being in your exact situation. It's so, so hard. Do you know if you have a sure start centre near you? They have volunteers who can come and help you as much or as little as needed. Flowers

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MessyBun247 · 31/05/2016 09:50

Thank you both. She has been rolling for a month already! But just goes onto her tummy then cries because she can't crawl. She's a determined wee thing! Def think she'll be happier when she can move. DD1 was the same, really hard work until about 6 months then gradually got easier. Although DD1 loved the pram and car seat so I never felt trapped like I do now.

I don't mind the co sleeping, i actually enjoy having her so close, it helps the anxiety a bit. Just wish she was a bit happier during the day.

I know time will pass, as it always does, things will slowly get easier and this will all be a memory. It's just hard to see that when the difficult days feel so long.

And no sure start but lots of baby groups, need to make more of an effort to get to them. I'm not usually a group person but it would probably make me feel a bit better.

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