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Overwhelming desire to have another?

(3 Posts)
ayesar Wed 13-Apr-16 18:35:03

I have 2 kids, who are 3 and almost 5. I have been debating whether to have another hot more than a year now. Got pregnant in December but miscarried 3 months later. Since then my husband says he's happy with 2 and doesn't want to think of having more right now. He says he doesn't have any desire to have another.

I am torn between wanting one and not wanting one. There are days when I get tired or am yelling at my kids and I think there's no way I can do this again. Or I think how in the world will there be enough of me to go around. Or I think our lifestyle will be so different with less vacations, activities for kids, etc. but there are days where the desire to get pregnant is so overwhelming. My husband and I decided that we won't think about having more for another year till our kids are a bit older. But MOST days I feel like I'm ready now. I know I have to wait but i just want to get pregnant now. How can I make myself think with my brain and just not think about it for a while?

Pixienott0005 Tue 19-Apr-16 14:15:50

Think long term. Your kids are close in age, they will move out and possibly go to uni while you will have another baby stuck with you. You'll save money. There are endless reasons not to have another, especially when you've got 2 healthy kids already.

babyblabber Tue 19-Apr-16 20:39:41

And there is only one reason to have

Of course two kids is easier, cheaper, over quicker (is that a good thing?!) but all of that is totally irrelevant if you want and can care for another child. The love and joy they bring is worth everything IF it's what you want. Only you can decide that.

I was always going to have three and a year into having all three it has been brilliant. Yes there are moments I want to scream and run away but even parents of one have those! I think 3 is the perfect number, plenty of fun and madness of a good size family but still manageable, fits in a normal size car etc! My problem is 3 has been so great I can't stop thinking about going for a 4th!

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