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Two year old won't listen to DH. At all.

(3 Posts)
loresho Wed 13-Apr-16 14:30:42

I know this is probably standard toddler behaviour, but not sure how to deal with this. DD is 2 (27 months) and for the past month or so has started completely ignorning DH when he asks her to do anything (eg, put on coat, come up for bathtime, stop jumping on sofa etc).

She adores him, says he's her best friend etc - I think she thinks of him as a playmate, and not someone to be taken seriously. He finally lost his temper with her yesterday, and ended up shouting (which he never ever does - v soft spoken sort of chap) and she got hysterical and said she was frightened of him sad and wouldn't talk to him at all this morning!

Any tips on how to get her to listen to him? She's fine with me, and she's generally a pretty easy going little girl.

corythatwas Wed 13-Apr-16 18:38:47

I would go for gently lifting her off the sofa, taking her up to bath time, shoving her arms in her coat, before he loses his temper: is far less upsetting for her but at the same time demonstrates that daddy does actually get his way. if he can do it with a joke and a laugh, all the better: the essential thing is that whatever daddy has said must happen does actually happen.

skankingpiglet Thu 14-Apr-16 18:35:50

Yes I agree with Cory. He needs to redefine himself as 'parent' from 'friend'.

Our DD is a bit younger but her comprehension is pretty good. She is a nightmare for selective hearing. We now ask a couple of times, then count to 3 (sometimes reiterating the request between numbers). She usually follows the instruction on the '3'. When she doesn't we gently remove her/put her where we're asking etc, if she kicks off we ask if she wants to go for 'quiet time'. Sometimes she says 'no' and complies with the request, sometimes 'yes' and sometimes ignores us. For the last two answers we take her up to her room and sit with her; no playing just quiet and cuddles until she's calm then we ask again. Still a 'no' then we do a bit more quiet time. I'm a bit uneasy about doing proper time outs and I don't think we would be able to get her to stay put, so this is a happy medium for us. She's still bad for ignoring, but we rarely need to do the quiet time now so there's been a definite improvement.
I agree though about trying to do things (initially) with a joke and a smile. We often try a small incentive as well eg 'Please can you out your shoes on? We need to go to the shops, but we'll stop at the park on the way home' (The P-word is always a great motivator!).

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