Young parents to be and feeling quite overwhelmed/scared!(6 Posts)
My partner and I have been together for a year and a half, we have a good relationship. We have lived together since day one first with his mum, now with my grandad in our own flat in the upstairs of his house. Our baby was unplanned and we discussed options when we first found out and he left it up to me to decide what to do and said he would be supportive of whatever descision I made. I decided to keep the baby and we are both excited and wanting the baby.
However I suffer with anxiety and worry sometimes I made the wrong choice and that I will not be good enough, I worry I won't cope. My partner is supportive but did say yesterday 'well it's too late to change now, we are very young, but we will manage' which is true but doesn't help the anxiety in me as I focus on the 'it's too late to change now' part and feel I have taken his choices away from him. I have spoken to him about it and he has reassured me he loves the baby already and that we will be fine. I am just looking for some support/advice on what to expect and how to deal with the changes to come.
I am 21F and my partner is 25M we both have good jobs (his far better than mine career wise, but it's a stable job) I am now on maternity, our baby is due in less than two weeks!
It's only natural to feel the way you do and age has nothing to do with it. Having a baby is one of the biggest things you'll ever do and going into the unknown is massively daunting.
It sounds like you have a very supportive partner who will help you both get through. I'm not going to lie, the beginning is tough, sleep deprivation and learning how to care for your baby is a steep learning curve but you will get through it and the rewards far outweigh the negatives.
The first smiles, giggles, cuddles are things you'll never forget.
Have you got any support from other family??
I was 31 when I had dc1 and still felt like that during the pregnancy and after the birth. I was scared, it was so final and he was a very much wanted and planned for baby. I had definite moments of "sh** what have we done?" It's natural.
I do have support from family but there are also rifts in my side of the family, that's a whole other ball game, my stepdad was abusive and is unhappy because we don't want to give him granddad status!
It's perfectly naturals to feel that way
I was 18 when I married my husband, I'm now 21 and expecting our second baby (DH is 26). When DD was born, I freaked out for a few days. Kind of like "omg what have I done?"....even now I have days where I doubt my abilities as a parent. But majority of the time, I look at this beautiful little girl that we made and realise I wouldn't have it any other way
You, your partner and your baby will be fine
Just wanted to add, I was 33 when we had our daughter, she was so planned - we'd been trying for a baby for two and a half years, had to have IVF in the end. And still I was cacking myself in the last few months of pregnancy. And the first months (years...) are hard and I did have moments of thinking 'what have we done...' even though it was the thing we wanted most in the world!!
So... you will look at first-time mums who are older than you and think, oh they really know what they're doing, but I promise you they are floundering around and guessing stuff just as much as you!
You will all be fine xxx
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