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7 year old cries over choices

(6 Posts)
icanteven Thu 17-Mar-16 15:44:19

My 7yo DD in Y2 moved to a new school this year and is happy. She is generally a happy, even tempered and relatively docile child, clever, loves telling stories, plays well and is even learning to stand up to her little sister!

When she is tired or stressed, she cries at the slightest provocation, and either/or choices, esp for treats, tend to push her over the edge a bit.

School has just told us that this is happening at lunch pretty much every day though. She can't decide between her choices at lunch, anxiously picks one, gets it, bursts into tears, wants the other choice, is given it (they are v kind at school) but then she gets distressed at not having the first choice.

She has a very sweet personality and I wouldn't change a thing about her, but I don't want her to get so overwrought about a chicken korma!

I see where she is coming from - I lose my mind slightly over menus sometimes and find it difficult to make choices if I'm presented with too many options, but that's normal, right?

Should the school not allow her to make a lunch choice? I feel that they shouldn't let her switch, but then that would put more pressure on her re. her first choice.

Tiny problem, I know, but any advice gratefully accepted.

TeaBelle Thu 17-Mar-16 15:52:50

I wonder if she would benefit from some over exposure - during the easter holidays could you expose her to lots of situations where she makes appropriate choices eg meals, but once she's made a choice then she must stick by it. Encourage lots of discussion about her thoughts before and after. Decrease the time allowed to choose if this becomes an issue.

If you see an improvement at home which is not matched at school, then it may warrant a discussion with the teacher as to anything else that may be impacting on her

Princesspeach1980 Thu 17-Mar-16 18:36:33

Can you get the menu from the school website and choose at home where there isn't as much pressure? My ds is really sensitive and gets like this if he is feeling rushed to do or decide something. its not so much the choice, as the time pressure.

GeorgeTheThird Thu 17-Mar-16 18:47:27

She needs to practise with small decisions I think. The red cup or the blue? No, you can't change your mind, red is fine. Cheerios or Weetabix, no, you've made a decision now, you can have Weetabix tomorrow. That sort of thing.

icanteven Fri 18-Mar-16 11:56:38

Thank you for these suggestions - I'll give them all a try!

jamtartandcustard Fri 18-Mar-16 12:25:16

I would suggest getting the menu then picking together at home. Most schools where I live have a meat option, vegetarian option and a jacket potato so not too overwhelming for children unless you really love them all.

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