My 14 yr old son has always lived with me. After my divorce 5 years ago he has contact with his dad 2 days a week.
This I had to get a court order for him to see his dad to which he would only agree to 8 days a month (this was as much as he could offer due to in his words "other commitments"). Court order has been in place for 10 months. I have requested an amendment as I have a new job 100 miles away. I have suggested contact each weekend and additional holiday contact with shared travelling, removing weekday contact in term time.
His dad has never had any additional time with him nor has ever wanted custody until now. He has persuaded my son, that after living with me for the last 14 years that it is only fair he goes to live with him. He continually brow beats my son and showers him with gifts when he sees him at the weekend that he needs to stay with him so that he can continue with his football team, see his friends. His dad has told me I can't have access with my son while the football season is on and would have to negotiate holidays. My son completely believes everything his dad tells him. He has also stated that he will not share 50% of the travel and that I would have to do it all regardless of who my son lives with.
His dad currently lives in a house with his new wife and 3 other children which means my son would have to share a small room. My XP works away at least 1-2 nights a week.
My son is very settled with me, doing well at school, there are no risks or issues at all. My son has been persuaded by his dad to say that he wants to live with him if asked by cafcas.
There are no other children that live with us nor will there be in the future.
There is absolutely no way I want my son to live with his dad. However I still want him to continue to have regular contact with his dad. I want my son to relocate with me and my partner (we have lived together for the last 3 years and my son and him get on extremely well). I have found a lovely school (same ofsted rating) and house which is nearer my extended family. I have tried to discuss this move with his dad, asked if he would go to mediation, but he says he will not talk to me nor go to mediation and will only go straight to custody battle in court. I also believe this custody battle is a financial reason for him to claim child maintenance for my son if he goes to live with him. Please can anyone give advice as our move is imminent. The first court hearing to amend court order is in 2 weeks time.
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Custody when moving home
5 replies
unsi · 14/03/2016 22:49
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