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Feeling unappreciated after a crap first Mother's dat

(24 Posts)
2015mom Mon 07-Mar-16 22:07:55

Hey it was my first Mother's Day and it was such a crap day! Had to rush around getting my mother in laws present! Go involved in some road rage as another woman was very rude to me.

I had to go to my mom's then my in laws and got criticised about my baby's weight from the brother in law!!!! How rude!!

Then on top of that I expected something special for my first Mother's Day present but I just got some tatty flowers and a card. Although my hubby did get these and go to the effort of getting them I just felt unappreciated as I thought I would have got something special for my first one. I mean as women we go through the pregnancy, painful labour and then the sleepless nights!!! On top of that I got his mother a nutribullet!!!

Since Mother's Day I have just been avoiding my husband and just in our room and cannot be brothered to do anytbing at home as I just think what is the point busting my gut to cool, clean and look after the baby. I have just been concentrating on looking after our baby as I cannot be bothered with anything else.

WomanWithAltitude Mon 07-Mar-16 22:10:31

I dont blame you for being pissed off.

Why are you expected to get his mum a mother's day gift? Surely that should be his responsibility?

gamerchick Mon 07-Mar-16 22:11:53

Why did you sort out your mils stuff and then expect stuff yourself?

2015mom Mon 07-Mar-16 22:15:50

Very true!
Her birthday is in April, I will take a step back and leave it to husband to sort out....

Husband did get mother in laws card and my card and flowers for me... I told him I expected a little bit more because end of day we only buy stuff for both bdays Christmas and special occasions so I ended up sending him my wish list for the third time!!!

Purplerain067 Mon 07-Mar-16 22:15:53

My day was crappy too, I had a driving lesson, an essay to write, a dinner to cook and didn't have time to see my Mum. No real effort made to show me any kind of appreciation. Next year I plan to book my own spa day haha.

flowers

2015mom Mon 07-Mar-16 22:16:45

That's a great idea purplerain!!! I think I will do that as well

LoopiusMaximus Mon 07-Mar-16 22:19:00

I received a card. Mil however received a card and a lovely boquet sad

I don't understand how he has the audacity to buy for his mum but not buy for me from our boys?!! I did think I was being silly but after speaking to friends and family I'm apparently not!

I also spent most the day driving to each of our parents!

LoopiusMaximus Mon 07-Mar-16 22:20:49

Brill idea purple. I'm looking forward to next years already now wink

2015mom Mon 07-Mar-16 22:21:13

Men!!!! Even when u give hints they don't listen!

Beautifulbella Mon 07-Mar-16 23:47:49

I know exactly how you feel, except I never even got a bunch of flowers instead oh got my Mother's Day card on Saturday when we were out shopping. I just felt like complete shit, it was my first Mother's Day and I wanted something to treasure, not a card he wrote in the car on the way home with me in the card! angry

2015mom Tue 08-Mar-16 00:11:05

Sorry to hear you had a crap first Mother's Day too!

I suppose the best thing we can do is educate our children to be more appreciative

Since Mother's Day I have let the house get in a state not clearing up after myself... She how hubby likes it hey ... He will soon realise I can't be bothered with anytbing

VictoriaRoses Tue 08-Mar-16 00:44:23

My first Mother's Day toosmileI was given some flowers and two cards (I have twins) also my husband changed their nappies twice each, he normally only manages to change one nappy a week (he works 9-6 6 days a week but still) he then got annoyed when I didn't thank him for changing their nappiesconfused

2015mom Tue 08-Mar-16 01:13:39

Lol men are funny! U have probably changed hundreds of nappies and he wanted thanks after doing it on Mother's Day lol

Mummyme87 Tue 08-Mar-16 16:15:40

My first Mother's Day I got a card and box of chocolates when I was trying to lose weight. I was so pissed off with OH.

Caprinihahahaha Tue 08-Mar-16 16:19:24

To be picky - it's not men. It's some men.

Buying presents from DH to his mother isn't really helping. You are treating him as if he is incapable of buying presents without help. He's not incspeable for dome reason is he?
If not, don't do it.
Moaning about him being incompetent but then treating him like a child won't help. He's an adult. He buys his own mothers gift.

TantrumsAndBalloons Tue 08-Mar-16 16:22:01

I honestly don't get it.

Mother's Day is a day for your children to show you love and appreciation, not your dh.

A baby has no idea it's Mother's Day. When your dcs get older and understand then it means something.

I honestly do not understand why it's a day that your husband should be putting loads of effort into buying you a present- you aren't his mother and if it's your first Mother's Day your dc have no clue about it anyway

Beautifulbella Tue 08-Mar-16 17:00:47

I understand what your saying Capri.. And tantrum.. But at the same time I would make the effort to get my oh a present and card on Father's Day, like you said baby's are to young to understand but it doesn't mean we as adults can't show or appreciate in that special day. If I get him things for Father's Day id like the same done in return.

VocationalGoat Tue 08-Mar-16 17:04:39

Don't worry. I'll top ya, OP. My DH said, "Fuck you!" as I swallowed by last bite of Mother's Day breakfast.
Nice. confused
It sucks when Mother's Day is sh*tty.
But hey..."Every day is Mother's Day".
There's always that optimistic approach. wink

TantrumsAndBalloons Tue 08-Mar-16 17:05:53

But it's a day for your children to show appreciation.
There are days, like valentines and anniversary for your dh to show appreciation.
Until your dcs understand it, it's pretty pointless

Caprinihahahaha Tue 08-Mar-16 17:35:21

Beautifulbella

My DH always 'helped' get gifts when my children were small. And I did the same for Father's Day.
Equally I would help my sons chose gifts for each other until they were able to chose themselves etc etc.

My point is that expecting men to be crap, rolling your eyes and saying 'tssk men!' - if owning a pair of bollocks inhibits the ability to shop and wrap - or worse still laughing at their ineptitude as if they were chikdren, really just makes the situation more likely.

Scoopmuckdizzy Tue 08-Mar-16 17:45:47

My first Mother's Day 3 years ago was shitty too. He disappeared off to rugby and then shouted at me for being upset about it.

I spent this mothers day painting the living room. DH bought me a magazine and a bar of chocolate from the children. I was pleased but thinking about the effort he went to to get his ex stuff when we were first together I do feel a bit like perhaps he doesn't think I deserve as much appreciation as she does. I feel so pathetic thinking along those lines but I'm pregnant and hormonal. I always make so much effort for him on Father's Day but this year I think I'll take a step back. I wonder what he'd think if I presented him with a magazine and a crunchie!

beela Wed 09-Mar-16 20:40:50

What tantrums said.

Florentina27 Sat 12-Mar-16 08:25:44

Only got chocolates, my huby doesn't do cards. I however treat it myself during that week on the mother's day excuse hihi. I think this day will only feel special when my DS would be old enough to say " I love you mummy" in a cute voice smile

Florentina27 Sat 12-Mar-16 08:26:47

DD

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