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How to say "No" to a 16m old?

(5 Posts)
anotherBadAvatar Thu 03-Mar-16 21:33:38

Like all toddlers, DD has moments when she's obviously a bit trying. How do I get across to her that she is doing something wrong?

Example: When she thumps the dog (who is incredibly good natured luckily), I move her away, tell her "No hitting" and distract her with something else. It then becomes a game, with her squealing in glee each time I tell her no and move her away. This applies to nearly anything- pushing the washing machine buttons, emptying cupboards or throwing food on the floor are other examples.

I know all of this is bog standard toddler behaviour, but will she "get it" at some point soon, or am I wasting my breath at the moment and need to wait till she's a bit older? And am I even approaching this the right way?!

anklebitersmum Thu 03-Mar-16 22:42:58

Keep doing what you're doing but you need to 'use the tone'. Lower your voice, which helps to give it a firm tone and keep your face 'straight'.

Emptying cupboards, food throwing etc can be helped using the tone and also by explaining that she will have to now sit and wait while you clear up effectively giving a time out whilst she watches.

If appropriate, have her help tidy up her mess. Again, use the firm 'not happy with your behaviour' tone when you tell her that what she did is not OK.

Difficult at 16 mths but absolutely possible-this age is when they start to realise that they have a personal influence on their surroundings and will push any and all boundaries out of sheer curiosity!

TeaBelle Thu 03-Mar-16 22:45:42

You can also model the behaviour you desire. So saying, 'no, gentle strokes only' while holding her hand and demonstrating.

ODog Fri 04-Mar-16 12:06:05

It's very hard. DS is 21mo and still doesn't always 'get it'. I find saying no hitting just encourages more hitting. I guess he picks up on the hitting part only hmm. Try suggesting the preferred behaviour. So instead of no hitting, say 'gentle with the dog please' and show her gentle behaviour. Distraction and offering alternatives also work quite well. So, if we want to hit something lets play with your hammer and peg toy or if we want to throw, let's go outside and play with a ball. All this is lifted straight from Sarah ockwell-smiths toddlercalm book. Some of it is a bit much for me but lots I found very useful.

howiloveanicecupoftea Sat 05-Mar-16 16:51:54

I found 16 m

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