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Parenting

(Venting / Rant . Old fashioned mother ,trying to get me to feed baby food!!

19 replies

mrsjoker35 · 03/03/2016 16:18

I need to vent!!!

So my LG is 3 months,JUST! and my mum, and my aunt are totally ganging up on me trying to get me to feed my baby food!
My aunt even, while looking after her put gravy on my baby's dummy!!

My mums always dropping hints trying to persuade me to feed her
She's such a bloody hypocrite too! My OH was holding our wee girl on her feet and she was pulling herself up, my mum was like "ooo no don't do that!! You'll end up making her bow legged", what a load of rubbish!!!
"Oh don't put her on her feet but DO stuff mashed potatoes and gravy down her throat",
Sick of iiiit !!

OP posts:

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BadDoGooder · 03/03/2016 16:23

That would piss me off too.
Can you print out/show them the NHS guidelines on weaning? Would they listen then?

mrsjoker35 · 03/03/2016 16:35

Oh god no! That would make them wise

"Well I fed you at 12 week. Your fine!"
" i feed all mine from 8 weeks,their all fine!" INASANE!!
But yep ,they done that with their kids, but this is MY kid and I'll be bringing her up my way with my own gut feelings and my own instincts . and my gut tells me her milk is enough and she's quite happy that way for now !

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Outaboutnowt · 03/03/2016 16:38

I had the same shit off my SIL and some of DPs family. Ignore ignore ignore.

When are you planning on weaning?

We waited til 6 months and honestly I'm surprised none of them called Childline on us - the way they carried on as though we were starving DS. He has grown normally following his percentiles and took to food (and feeding himself) really well and that shut them all up.

You could just say 'it's my baby and I'm doing things my way - just like you odd with your babies'
I would be wary about leaving her with them tbh if they're not prepared to respect your wishes with parenting, if they fed her something before she's started weaning I would be livid.

Btw it's fine to stand your baby on her legs while you're holding her. It will help strengthen her muscles - I've found they like being gently bounced as if they're on a trampoline at that age

Outaboutnowt · 03/03/2016 16:39

*did not odd

mrsjoker35 · 03/03/2016 16:58

Oh yeah definitely wanting to wait till 6 months if my LG shows interest in my food at 5 months I may consider it. But 6 month sounds perfect ! 3 months is a short time to wait!
Yeah they act as if I'm starving her as well ! "Awwh that's a shame , are we all eating in front of you again?! And you can't get any of it"
Yeah I was upset last week talking to my OH about it because now I can't trust them if I want go to the cinema or something because their feeding her gravy! I come back and there's crap all over my baby's collar , I was raging but I didn't say anything I was that shocked! She's my baby, and I'll feed her when I! Feed her, so no babysitting till she's weaning because they can't be trusted ,their loss! Not mine tbh

Yeah I seriously doubted that it would do any harm! How could it?! It'll strengthen them more than anything, surely!

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Outaboutnowt · 03/03/2016 17:09

If I'm totally honest - weaning is a faff and its messy whichever way you do it and whenever you do it so if I were you I'd hold off until you think she's ready!
NHS advises definitely not before 17 weeks, but ideally around 26 weeks IIRC.
If you think she's happy with milk then carry on. You know her best!

For some reason weaning is one of those topics where lots of people seem to have strong opinions on it! SIL was enraged that I waited so long and that I didn't liquidise everything. I don't know why it bothered her so much - I didn't give a shiny shit when and how she weaned her kids.

KP86 · 03/03/2016 17:17

My standard reply to things like 'we're eating in front of you' was 'well, he's just getting a preview of tomorrow's menu!'

Amummyatlast · 03/03/2016 18:22

I would really make an issue of it - gravy is full of salt!

magpie17 · 03/03/2016 19:53

I would hate this! We started weaning at bang-on 6 months (I'm a rule follower by nature!) and everyone acted like we were starving DS even though we stuck to the guidelines completely. He wasn't bothered by food and six weeks on he still isn't that fussed but people make out like you are harming your child when you are following professionals advice.

I would be livid if people fed my DS before we wanted to introduce food and would be livid now if they fed him something I had asked them not to. It's a shame that you really have to stand your ground with the people who should be supporting your choices the most, but it seems typical of a lot of people's experiences.

mrsjoker35 · 03/03/2016 20:50

I know of all the things that she could of gave her , she gives her gravy !! So unhealthy :(

Well I'm standing my ground and I'll be feeding her when I feel it's right ,and I feel that 5-6 months is right! Feeding her should be an experience for me and her dad not anyone else
I don't take on all advice I'm given ,but when it comes to health I'm all for it!
I saw a post on Facebook on a mums advice group a women started early weaning and her wee boy got food allergies and his digestive system was shot! The mother was saying she made a mistake and advises mums against early weaning! It really shook me up and made me even more determined not to wean. She's only small ! What's the rush?! As I said 3 months is such a small time to wait especially when making these kinds of decisions

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nicg85 · 03/03/2016 20:52

I know exactly how you feel!!
My dd is 4 months and we went out for lunch with my DH grandparents last Sunday. When my back was turned grandma was trying to push a spoonful of Eton mess into my dd mouth!!

Outaboutnowt · 03/03/2016 21:55

Yes just stand your ground OP. They need to back off and accept you are doing things your way.
I don't understand the rush either, everyone I know weaned at 3-4 months. Tbh I think a lot of parents just do what their parents did, their mums tell them to wean at 4 months or whatever so they do. There's a lot of myths that fly about regarding early weaning such as 'they'll sleep better if they start solids' (they don't IME!)

Enjoy it when you get to it, it's fun watching them try food for the first time

Dixiechick17 · 03/03/2016 23:09

I kept telling them, would you like to eat when you can't sit up properly to do so. When they came out with the crap line " well I fed you at such and such age and it didn't do you any harm" my standard response to this is to list any faults I do have, such as food intolerances, IBS etc. I then follow it up with, "I appreciate you have an opinion, but last time I checked this is my child and I have the right to parent her exactly how I choose, if your Mum had tried to tell you to do something different to what you wanted for me, what would you have said??"

I put a lot of back ups in the beginning but stood firm, your baby, your choice, you shouldn't have to defend those choices.

Dixiechick17 · 03/03/2016 23:10

The rush is that they seem to have it in their heads that the sooner you get a baby on food the sooner they will sleep through, total crock.

gallicgirl · 03/03/2016 23:16

Point out that there's more calories in milk than purée.

Or the simple "my baby, my rules" works well.

mrsjoker35 · 04/03/2016 12:48

My LG is a 10 pm till 7 am sleeper already! Lol so they can't even try throw that at me haha!
I'm glad others can relate to this. Its absolutely ridiculous , I tear my hair out every time we/they visit
Its totally embarrassing too because my OH is like " why are they bossing you around?" I feel like a child
And I totally agree with that Dixiechick!! My digestive system is not what it could be either, IBS symptoms like crazy! Constant change in my toilet habits, gas, gurgley belly.... Awful,awful! I definitely put it to early weaning !! I don't want to stump my baby girls quilty of life once she's older because I didn't want to wait 3 short months

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justonesherryformedicinalpurpo · 04/03/2016 12:56

I totally understand where you're coming from! Mine wasn't so much food but more breastfeeding at first. Mother pressuring me to give formula because my LO is petite and that babies have died from dehydration! Erm she's well fed and gets plenty of water from breast milk!

Then when LO started having food I was met with criticism from what I gave her, or more what I didn't give her. I.e. cake or white toast! Bearing in mind she had only just started having banana and baby rice etc.!

my friend was just as bad. When DD was almost 4m "Give her a lick chocolate, she'll like that it's something different" She doesn't know any different and there is absolutely no need! Or "is she thirsty" whenever she cried. How many more times! Shes doesn't need water when she's breastfed on demand!

I promise is gets easier though. Eventually they give up!

mrsjoker35 · 04/03/2016 12:57

Don't get me wrong I'm looking forward to feeding her foods and to experiment with different tastes and textures .
But no rush , I love holding her and feeding her her milk just now :)
Live for the moment

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mrsjoker35 · 04/03/2016 12:59

Chocolate!!! what the HECK!! Why not stuff a happy meal down her throat and come cola while your at it mental!!! Crazy!!! Ludicrous
Definitely ,no need at all

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