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Away from baby for the day

8 replies

toohardtothinkofaname · 20/02/2016 18:07

Just after some advice; hoping to get to a gig in early June when ds will be 5 months old. I'd have to leave early morning & wouldn't be back until around 3am. He's breastfed but taking expressed bottles, MIL due to look after him but he wouldn't be sleeping out, she'd have him at ours.

Is it too young to leave him for that long? If it's ok to go, what prep would I need to do in advance; like would MIL need to shadow bedtime routine or OK to write it down?

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Iguessyourestuckwithme · 20/02/2016 18:17

Hi,

I am a nanny who works with a small baby. On a day like this I would want mum to write down his general routine so 7am awake, 7.30 bottle, 9am nap etc and if I had to do anything in particular at nap times - special bunny, sleep bag, or just straight into bed. Also information about your bedtime routine; what time you start it and anything that he needs before bed. But basically if I were you, I would just let MIL do it her way for a day - don't worry if he isn't played 3 specific lullabies at 6.15 or if he has a shorter/longer naps at nap times.

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toohardtothinkofaname · 20/02/2016 18:52

Thank you Iguess. MIL bit flappy with ds at the moment so more for her to feel confident but agree that maybe letting her know she can just crack on might help with that!

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Iguessyourestuckwithme · 20/02/2016 20:29

I would aim for her to have him for shorter periods of time - gives you time for yourself too. Main periods I would work on are bedtime routine but also let her have a morning/afternoon with him to "hang out" and get to know his squawks/personality.

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KatyN · 20/02/2016 22:16

I did a day a month of work from when my son was 3 months, not as long as you'll be out but still a whole day as my mum used to look after my son he night before so I would sleep. I used to write a schedule for her and leave as much out and ready for her as possible. Also plan the next day might be getting back in track as your mil might not have sterilised bottles or emptied nappy buns etc.. Just little things. Although if you get in at 3 am you might want to. Ask her to do the following morning too.

No reason why you shouldn't,t go.. Just be prepared for how many times you want to ring home! X

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Caterina99 · 21/02/2016 01:32

If your baby will be 5 months in June, he must still be quite small. I wouldn't worry too much just yet, they change so much in the next few months. You'll know how you feel about it closer to the time. Let your MIL spend time and get to know him and his routine if he has one by then. Maybe have her watch him for a few hours every so often so you get a break and she gets some time with him.Then I'd write down his basic routine for the day so she has a guide, but tell her not to stress over it - as long as he's fed and clean, it's just one day - he'll be fine!

My parents had DS over night once at 5 months. I'm pretty sure his naps were totally screwed up and his bottle routine too, but he was happy and healthy and my parents loved it (but happy to hand him back and get a full nights sleep!)

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tangerinesarenottheonlyfruit · 21/02/2016 02:13

I did almost exactly what you're planning - left DS at 5 months to go to a gig.

5 months seemed like ages away when I booked the tickets! But it came round very quickly.

There is no set answer about whether a baby is too young at 5 months. It depends on the baby. I would say you need to trust your instincts on this one, and don't let other people sway you to do anything you don't feel is right.

It was a bit easier for me as my sister lived 15 minutes from the venue, so in fact I only left him a few hours. Even so it was difficult as it was his first time away from me, and he wouldn't take a bottle, so he was just without milk for that time.

So I'd say, it could be tough, don't underestimate this. Personally I couldn't have gone for that long - not saying you shouldn't! Just be aware that when it comes to it, you might not want to.

It might be worth doing some practice runs, leaving DS for a short while with your MIL so he gets used to it.

Is there any way you can make it a bit shorter? Could you book a hotel near the venue so you're only away a few hours? Would MIL be up for coming to the hotel? (Maybe something you don't want to ask - just a suggestion!)

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catsofa · 21/02/2016 03:05

Don't forget you'll need to pump to empty your breasts a bit, probably a few times.

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toohardtothinkofaname · 21/02/2016 15:41

Thanks for replies! Definitely will have MIL look after him a bit as trial runs & will have her do a few 'put yo bed' runs.

Gig is a few hours drive away & going there and back the same day so not able to make it shorter. Could leave later I suppose and just be near the back, will see how I feel nearer the time.

Will definitely take my pump; will be hard throwing milk away! Don't think a cool bag would keep the milk right for that length of time would it?