Can you make me feel ok? So many people warned me about the guilt I'd feel as a parent. I wondered what they were on about for ages. But now it's crept up on me. I have a 3 month old and a just 2yo. 2 yo has just decided he wants to potty train. I'm not doing that properly because of the baby. Baby, for one reason or another, needs to take a bottle. She does, but I can never find time to express, so it's really haphazard and erratic, and I keep worrying that she'll lose the ability just when she needs it. They're both happy and developing well, but I'm rubbish at getting the toddler to eat and nap properly, and the baby has no bedtime, just passes out any old time downstairs and gets carried to bed with us. It wasn't like this when I just had one! It feels a bit like they're a bit neglected, though I am trying my best!
I felt exactly the same when I had dd2. It was so different and I felt like I was doing every badly and neglecting them both. Dd2 had awful reflux, BF never worked out for us due to an undiagnosed tongue tie and I spent so much time caring for her that dd1 got a bit neglected (2.5 years between them). I ended up with undiagnosed pnd that I only sought help for when dd2 was 8 months so just keep an eye on how you're feeling. I think guilt like you're describing is normal but if you feel it's starting to take over everything and you feel like running away the majority of the time then please, please ask for support from your HV or gp. Dd2 has just turned one and I'm so much better.