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Would you speak to the teacher?

(15 Posts)
lovelylilly Mon 25-Jan-16 20:32:35

Mostly well behaved and academically interested 4 yr old DS had a bad day today. Teacher reported to in-laws at the end of the day that he had drawn around himself on the carpet in felt tip. Also reported poor listening on a number of occasions and commented on his recent poor choices in terms of chattering and splashing in mud at playtime. I know it's not horrendous but I feel pretty sad and mortified as she walked out with my son to deliver this msg and have a word with my in-laws in front of everyone.

I've spoken to my LO about what happened and why and what he needs to do in future. Should I speak to the teacher? I want to let her know I've dealt with it. Do I need to make my LO apologise? How about the carpet...should I check if it's permanently ruined (should they be using washable felt tips?) and what if it is actually ruined?! I'm not making excuses, but I'm pretty sure my son is poorly and grumpy at present and, whether relevant or not, I think he's at a social disadvantage because he's one of the youngest in the class.

noblegiraffe Mon 25-Jan-16 20:44:52

Give it a week then ask the teacher if he has improved his behaviour. If yes then great, if no then you can have a discussion about a way forward.

Forget the carpet. It's a reception carpet, I expect it has seen worse.

starry0ne Mon 25-Jan-16 20:46:16

I think you are over thinking things here..

At 4 he should not be drawing around himself on the carpet..whether poorly or not.. I am afraid if the carpet is marked there will be a felt tip reminder of your DS in repetition for a long time but it is part of the learning process.
I think the socially disadvantaged.. I was the youngest in my year and used that to my advantage...I think if you start excusing his behaviour based on been youngest you are heading down a long road.

happystory Mon 25-Jan-16 20:48:15

Chattering and splashing in mud? Isn't that what 4 year olds do?

jelliebelly Mon 25-Jan-16 20:54:42

I would have a chat with ds reminding him to listen and not be silly at school - let the teacher know that you've reinforced the message ( we write notes for things like this) and then ask in a couple of weeks if it has improved. Forget about being the youngest or you'll be excusing every incident for the next 14 years!

lovelylilly Mon 25-Jan-16 21:02:10

Yep. I hear you. His behaviour re: carpet was just plain naughty and there is no excuse. I do tend to overthink things...that's also true, especially when I think someone (teacher in this case) might be thinking bad of me or my family.

chillybillybob Mon 25-Jan-16 21:33:33

Your over thinking this op. I bet the teachers, ta had a giggle about the drawing around himself after. After all it shows creativity, and great pencil control.

Of course she would have to tell him off for this and make sure you know about it as its not something she would won't to encourage.

Leave it a couple of days and ask how his behaviour has been and say that you gave him a good talking too.

But don't stress he is only 4

Gobbolino6 Mon 25-Jan-16 21:39:21

I did laugh about the carpet, and I'm sure you and your son will do so too, for many years to come. My DB was one of the younger ones. I remember the world almost ending because he called the teacher a silly name (not terrible at all, but if I shared it might out me). He went on to have a very happy and productive school career! He's 4. Don't worry, you've spoken to him and you're supportive of him and school, that's fine.

lovelylilly Mon 25-Jan-16 21:46:04

Thanks guys...didn't see the positives in this! He might become the next Banksy or something and then that reception carpet will be worth something!

Gobbolino6 Tue 26-Jan-16 05:12:15


Jw35 Tue 26-Jan-16 06:39:33

Drawing around himself on the carpet grin sorry op but that's so funny (and cute). He won't have realised the damage to the carpet, he was being careless (and 4). As for chatting and getting muddy that's just kids! Have a word with the teacher but don't for a second this this is ott for a reception child!

powerfail Tue 26-Jan-16 06:57:11

When I worked in reception I was out of the room with a group and the teacher yelled down the corridor for help. I went running and a boy had painted himself head to toe in blue paint and it was dripping on the carpet. shockgrin

Please don't worry about the carpet. It will have seen pee, poo and vomit.

Gobbolino6 Tue 26-Jan-16 11:00:54

My DS' best friend just COULD NOT resist standing on his chair and making a 'snowfall' any time glitter was in reach when they were in Reception. The poor caretaker.

Topsy34 Tue 26-Jan-16 19:42:15

I reckon that carpet has been drawn on, wee'd on, pooed on , puked on more times than they care to remember.

He is 4, i would be worried if he didn't do some cheeky stuff!

Have a word with the teacher but its not ott at all

caravanista Tue 26-Jan-16 20:06:41

I honestly don't think his behaviour is anything to worry about and I imagine the teacher was feeding back just to make a point to your DS. However, as a teacher, I would not expect to share information about a child with anyone except the parents. Unless you've agreed to that happening it's a real breach of confidentiality.

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