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Broken record preschooler - how to reassure?

(8 Posts)
parrotonmyshoulder Wed 20-Jan-16 10:06:02

Context: new nursery 3x per week for past two weeks (moved house). CM two days but she has no space for the other three. DS is used to nursery and liked his old one after the first few weeks. DH and I work full time.

Both DC poorly this week - been off tues and today. Probably will be better for tomorrow (virus/ high temp/ sleepiness/ general grot).

DS cannot stop today, crying and saying 'I don't want to go to nursery after this sleep'. It's been constant since 8am. Hard to explain that he'll only go if he feels better, and if he feels better it'll be okay.

I feel like I've tried everything. Lots of distraction, affirming his feelings. I'm not the 'tell him to shut up' type, so that kind of advice isn't helpful.

He might want to play nurseries if big sister will play. That sometimes helps. He's 3.6 by the way.

Thanks.

parrotonmyshoulder Wed 20-Jan-16 11:45:40

Desperate bump. 4 hours of it now. I can distract for a few minutes, then he launches straight back into the wailing. Perhaps it's just because he's still not well.

Whatsinaname2011 Wed 20-Jan-16 11:51:16

Can't you just tell
Him that's fine he doesn't have to go? And then tomorrow reasses

parrotonmyshoulder Wed 20-Jan-16 12:20:10

Thanks, yes, I've been trying that.

rumbleinthrjungle Wed 20-Jan-16 12:33:14

If he's that stuck on the thought despite all reassurance it sounds like it may be about not feeling well and it's all got focused on 'I can't cope with nursery'. Are you happy there's no ears/sinus type pain that might be low level and making him miserable without him showing or telling you?

If distraction isn't helping - and four hours, poor you and poor ds! - will he snuggle up and cry it out with you in front of a dvd while you relax as much as you can and do the Radiating Calm Its All Fine Mummy thing? Try different pain/temp meds? Warm bath and see if that relaxes him any? Blowing some bubbles together to get him to breathe a bit deeper and calm down? Massage hands and feet and back if he'll let you?

Another thought just in case it helps, if you rang nursery would a familiar person tell him they won't see him back until he's feeling better? You mentioned new nursery in your OP, is he still settling with them?

rumbleinthrjungle Wed 20-Jan-16 12:34:14

btw forgot important bits brew thanks

Hoping you've got good coffee and chocolate to hand.

parrotonmyshoulder Wed 20-Jan-16 13:04:31

Thanks rumble. He hasn't been happy at new nursery but the last two sessions were okay (last thurs and fri). He's been poorly since Sunday. It may be that he thinks he wouldn't like nursery today (as he's still a bit poorly) so can't forsee that he might not feel like this tomorrow! Does that make sense?

Anyway, we've had nice calm stories for the last hour. For any nursery woes I've been replying 'no nursery today'. DD is sleeping, which DS needs but he won't because he thinks it'll be nursery when he wakes up!

Poor child.

No coffee in the house!!

rumbleinthrjungle Wed 20-Jan-16 15:08:38

It makes a lot of sense, he's only three poor little chap. Glad to hear he's settling with the stories, I hope you all get an easier afternoon and he's feeling better tomorrow.

I'm sorry to hear about the coffee shortage!

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