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Heartbroken when she goes

(5 Posts)
CumbriaMum91 Wed 06-Jan-16 19:46:34

I have a separated family, my DD is 3 and me and her dad have basically 50/50 custody. He lives with his parents and he's never there when it's his days sad

I see on FB or she tells me etc. It's just breaking my heart because I'm missing out on half of her life when if he isn't that bothered he should let me spend that time with her sad

I am miserable whenever she isn't around and it kills me every pick up because he never turns up for her its always his parents and she's so upset. We already have a court order in place but I can't prove that he isn't around for her behind closed doors.

Id be less upset if they were bonding and having fun but she says she sits on her phone (I have no idea why she has a phone) and he sleeps or is out. It's becoming impossible to bear, I don't want shared custody with his parents (who are horrid btw and undermine us both), she should be with me if he has no interest hmm

Sorry for the rant. Anyone else struggle when they have to share custody with a deadbeat?

starpatch Thu 07-Jan-16 22:28:08

I'm sorry that's awful for both of you I hope you get more custody soon. Just wondering if you would be within your rights to refuse to hand her over to in law's only hand her over to your ex could you get some legal advice what your court decision actually means? Hopefully he won't keep this up for long.

Boomerwang Fri 08-Jan-16 09:20:54

This phone she has, does it have a SIM card and can she make or receive calls? She's young but if you can teach her how to answer the phone perhaps you could at least talk to her sometimes.

Keep a diary of things which happen or things your daughter says and express your concerns to... er... whoever it is that forced you two apart. (Sorry, I don't even know what it's called in my country). Remember grandparents are not her parents so what they want doesn't matter.

Sorry, this all sounds so feeble doesn't it? I also have only 50/50 access to my own daughter but it's a mutual agreement so I don't know how it works beyond that.

timelytess Fri 08-Jan-16 09:29:04

I'm sorry that you are both in this position, Boomerwang and OP. The 50/50 custody situation strikes me as the most ridiculous pile of crap I've ever heard. I'd have been ready to kill if someone had tried to do this to me. The ex got a few hours on Saturday and even that he show any particular enthusiasm for. Children aren't parcels, its time we put a stop to this rubbish. Boomerwang, you agreed to this? It suits you?

timelytess Fri 08-Jan-16 09:30:01

didn't show enthusiasm. I proof read, too. blind as a bat.

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