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Developmental damage due to too much time on their smart phone

(45 Posts)
Debsmumof3 Sat 02-Jan-16 09:51:23

I am hoping this thread will alleviate my concerns. In the hairdressers the other day a met a lady who ran a preschool. I am a secondary teacher. We both have a teenagers.
Various things were discussed but the matter which worried me the most was what she said about the children coming to her. They lack basic communication skills. Increasingly can't sing nursery rhymes, count 123. Or attempt to use a pencil. Social skills and behaviour are increasingly challenging. And the reason she gave was the mums (and dads of course) spending time on their smartphones rather than interact with their child. I have witnessed mums ignoring kids in coffee shops when it's just the two of them. And once in Cildren's A&E a little girl (whose dad was comforting a poorly baby) decided she wanted to play with me. My son and I talked to her and showed her how the toys worked. Eventually my 9yo read to her. She was a delight and the dad kept smiling appreciatively. I had noticed in the corner a young women constantly on her mobile phone. I felt for her. Clearly her little one must be in cubicles, and for some reason she could be with them. Poor thing. The dad was called in the little girl said bye bye. Can you imagine after an hour of entertaining this delightful girl this woman stood up and called her. The child said no mummy I want to stay here. The woman then addressed me and said she's never been so good - well I couldn't help myself, I responded "perhaps if you gave her as much attention as you do your phone she would !!" She looked ashamed and left. Even my son commented. "I'm glad you don't spend 'that'much time on your phone mummy". Emphasis on 'that' meaning I was guilty of the same really.
To hear the new generation are going 'backwards' developmentally really concerns me. Please please, someone reassure me!

TaliZorah Sat 02-Jan-16 09:57:33

So you just wanted a thread to brag about how you don't use your phone much and how your kids are apparently so much better behaved for it?


hadtoregregister Sat 02-Jan-16 10:01:30

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 Sat 02-Jan-16 10:03:21

You seriously made an arsey judgey post to a mum in children's A and E with her baby?

Shame on you

fanjoforthemammaries7850 Sat 02-Jan-16 10:04:11

Comment not post. I spend too much time on here.

Still, that is shocking.

hadtoregregister Sat 02-Jan-16 10:04:50

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NameAgeLocation Sat 02-Jan-16 10:05:49

You have no idea what that woman was doing on her phone or how much sleep she'd had that night. Possibly none.

Ubik1 Sat 02-Jan-16 10:07:47

I think it is an issue. But the pre-school not reading, counting thing...people were saying this long before smartphones came along. And prw-school education helps establish good habits.

usual Sat 02-Jan-16 10:08:03

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tiktok Sat 02-Jan-16 10:12:17

Debs that was not a kind thing to say to a mother who had shown some warm appreciation to you for amusing her child sad

No one likes being judged in this way.

I really don't think there is any evidence that smartphones are preventing parents from engaging with communication so their children arrive at nursery unable to take part. How old are these children anyway? Most children are not able to sing a whole nursery rhyme without help until about three.

You might have a point that some parents use their phones a lot when they could be engaging with their toddlers. But I remember the same issues being raised about daytime television.

Whatever. It's not a great idea to make a big thing of judging other people on the basis of a casual and short lived observation!

hadtoregregister Sat 02-Jan-16 10:13:50

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tethersend Sat 02-Jan-16 10:18:13

The best place to post sneering judgements about reliance on technology is the internet.

doitanyways Sat 02-Jan-16 10:19:48

usual has pretty much nailed it; I'm great, you're not, end of.

Murphyslaw21 Sat 02-Jan-16 10:21:53

Wow what a judgemental person you are. I hope for your sake you are not ever sitting doing something for yourself for a time. You must be the best mother in the world!! And everyone else cannot compare to you. Pat yourself on the back . Just hope your children learn not to be so judgemental before they know the whole story

Nonidentifyingnc Sat 02-Jan-16 10:23:28

You are so smug.

Was the irony lost on you of posting on the internet to tell us how little time you spend posting on the internet?

hadtoregregister Sat 02-Jan-16 10:24:46

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

usual Sat 02-Jan-16 10:26:04

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bambooshoots14 Sat 02-Jan-16 10:26:16

I spend ALOT of time on my phone but my nearly 2yo DS is fine developmentally and can do all the things listed in your op.

That comment to that poor mum was nasty and so badly timed


Shakey15000 Sat 02-Jan-16 10:30:25

I'm aghast. Not that I don't think in general that tech is used far more than ever before.

But you had NO IDEA what was happening to that woman in the hospital. She may have been texting relatives, googling symptoms etc. You had no right to judge and shame her publicly. Shame on you I'm afraid.

NellWilsonsWhiteHair Sat 02-Jan-16 10:30:38

How unkind you were. To a woman with a baby in A&E ffs! And then you dare to put yourself forward as Mother Of The Bloody Year?! biscuit

tethersend Sat 02-Jan-16 10:30:56

Indeed usual.

Especially about stuff that almost definitely happened.

Fairylea Sat 02-Jan-16 10:30:58

My 3.5 year old ds has severe autism and going on his tablet is one of the only ways he knows how to relax and enjoy himself. Games and toys mean very little to him.

iPad use is widely appreciated within the special needs community and have many uses educationally and development wise, so much so that charities such as Family Fund (partly funded by the government) make regular awards of iPads to families on low incomes with disabled children (amongst other things).

If you saw ds and I out and about with his head in the iPad and me pushing him in his buggy no doubt you'd have your judgey pants on because he looks "normal". hmm

53rdAndBird Sat 02-Jan-16 10:31:44

How does the preschool lady know how much time each child's parents spend on smartphones at home? Does she have hidden cameras?

hadtoregregister Sat 02-Jan-16 10:35:03

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

0phelia Sat 02-Jan-16 10:38:05

I thought this might be about giving your baby/toddler a smartphone to play with rather than interacting with them.
I wonder if that creates problems, but parents on a smartphone is no different to parents watching telly all day.

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