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why do I hate this so much

(16 Posts)
waitingforsomething Fri 18-Dec-15 08:31:12

I have a 3 year old dd and a 5 mo ds. Older one is fine, easy enough for a 3 year old and love having her around. I love my baby but today I feel really miserable. He is a shitty sleeper, he's gone from a good milk drinker to a crap one drinking half his milk, getting him to take a nap is hours of rocking, crying, whinging. HV advised I started weaning and he doesn't seem to much like this either. I didn't like the baby stage with dd but I'm just finding it harder and harder - I'm wishing I was back at work rather than dealing with him. I just hate the endless naps, feeds, unpredictable nights, crying and I can't remember why I ever had another one because it doesn't feel worth it right now

waitingforsomething Fri 18-Dec-15 08:42:08

I feel like I get no nice time even with dd because he's making a bloody fuss about everything all day.

Imfinehowareyou Fri 18-Dec-15 08:56:13

It will pass. It will, it will, it will flowers You are in the eye of the storm at the moment. I have a similar gap to you and now DD2 is older it is much easier.

waitingforsomething Fri 18-Dec-15 09:01:50

Thanks. Dd feels like a doddle. I'm just so shit and unatural with babies. I just hate having them and I feel like his babyhood is going to last forever and poor dd is going to have to listen to him going on and on

WildStallions Fri 18-Dec-15 09:05:22

Why don't you go back to work?

No way could I have taken a long maternity leave. My DC were much better off with someone who enjoyed babies, rather than me. Who didn't.

MrsJayy Fri 18-Dec-15 09:08:39

Not long to go before he will be moving around talking and giving you something back as ^^ said it will pass it flowers babies dont do much and the daily grind gets you down just because he is a fussy baby doesnt mean you are shit at it and doing anything wrong

waitingforsomething Fri 18-Dec-15 09:16:12

I am going back in Feb. I want to try and spend the time with him as I'll probably regret it when he's big and I missed it!
I just feel guilty for disliking the baby stage and I feel like I prefer my other child. I love them the same I just get nothing from him other than crying and refusal to eat/sleep in any kind of discernible pattern. She got better so I guess he will!

HeteronormativeHaybales Fri 18-Dec-15 09:19:18

Don't try and make him take naps at set times. Feed on demand. If he won't go to sleep put him in the sling or buggy and get out and about. He will (hopefully!) fall asleep and you will feel better. Be led by him, not by a presumed need for strict routine.

MrsJayy Fri 18-Dec-15 09:27:19

has he been checked for silent reflux if he is fussy over milk and food then he might be uncomfortable and thats why he is so fussy .

SunnyDays1987 Fri 18-Dec-15 13:24:53

Baby stage is boring and crap and hard work. It passes so fast though as I'm sure you know with having an older one. Just absolutely do what you have do to get through it. Have you got friends or family on hand to help pass the time a bit?

waitingforsomething Fri 18-Dec-15 15:02:25

Thank you - I don't think hes got reflux as the fussing is quite new - he was drinking well until a couple of weeks ago.
I've got my mum,l and a few friends- I guess I just need to hang on. Another 5 months and he'll be a different baby again

WildStallions Fri 18-Dec-15 15:49:09

You won't regret it.

You'll think how amazing they are at the next stage. How much better they get every year.

People who miss the baby stage are those that enjoyed it in the first place.

MrsJayy Fri 18-Dec-15 16:16:46

I work with littilies and i am a bit meh about the babies blush

Nutgirl Fri 18-Dec-15 20:04:06

I have a three year age gap and now they are 4 and 13 months it is great! They really play together and love each other. Plus DS2 has been walking since 10 months so has become a toddler and a character / personality quite early. He is doing everything earlier than DS1 - I think because he just wants to keep up with him. But the newborn with toddler stage was hard. When you've had no sleep and don't know how you are going to get through the day entertaining a three year-old plus feeding / changing / rocking a screaming baby it can really grind you down. Hang in there, it will pass before you know it and your DCs will entertain each other and you will understand why you had two children.

Littlef00t Fri 18-Dec-15 20:19:39

Is he sitting yet? Dd was worse just before she could sit, then she was much happier being able to grab a toy and see the world.

waitingforsomething Fri 18-Dec-15 20:58:29

Not unsupported. Perhaps that'll cheer him up! He was really content 1-3 months and then became miserable!

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