To summarise:
Have DS 4 and DD 6 weeks old
Horrendous birth
Been staying with family for past 6 weeks
Going g back home tomorrow where I have to pack up my entire house as it's been sold. Moving out beginning of January.
Then to inlaws where we will be staying for forseeable future until we find a home.
I am beyond depressed. I am
Continuously anxious and cry all the time every time things go 'wrong'
Baby has no routine. Fights sleep constantly. Currently been in my arms for 2 hours desperate to sleep but crying and waking every few minutes. She plays for 10jns before being cranky again. Feeds erratically sometimes 5oz sometimes 2.
But it's mostly the lack of proper sleep that's killing me. Won't sleep in Moses basket or bouncer or sofa or bed. If she does it will be for 20ins then 2 hours of fighting and crying in my arms trying to go back to sleep.
So far I've coped having family around to palm her off to when I can so I can also take care of DS
But now I'm going home I am panicking about how to cope with a baby who won't sleep or be put
down, a 4 yr old who goes to preschool and a house to pack up. DH helps but isn't very good with holding the baby...he just can't seem to calm her at all.
I know everyone will say a sling but even that is hit and miss. Sometimes it works other times makes her scream even more.
This is soooo long and boring. Sorry. But I just need to rant I think.
I feel so depressed all the time. We had really debated whether to have another child because I had PND and just struggled to cope and now it's happening again. I panic and cry and get angry (at the baby) and want to run away. DS is getting nothing from me either and I am
Consumed with guilt.
Oh god. I will stop
Now. Thanks for reading
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6 weeks old and I am still floundering
2 replies
crystalgall · 04/12/2015 15:00
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