help getting daughter to sleep pleeease!(4 Posts)
My daughter is 6m this Sunday. For the first two months of her life she had to sleep on us. She just refused to be put down. We bought a baby hamper and that didn't work until one day it did! Then we bought her cot and a sleepyhead so rather than bouncing her to sleep we are rocking her to sleep. Obviously we are her sleep association. She is becoming increasingly difficult to rock to sleep and it's causing me a LOT of despair! A friend said don't worry about it if it keeps her happy as she still rocks her 2 1/2 yr old to sleep but I DON'T want to be doing that! Please please please can anyone offer some tips! And success stories please.
We're apprehensive about controlled crying. We did try it tonight and were positive there was nothing she needed but I've never heard her sound so devastated. She sounded just like when she was fresh from the womb! We don't like seeing her that upset and I do worry it will have an impact on her emotionally...
p.s. she is bf and when she wakes in thr night for a couple of feeds she goes back to sleep beautifully.
We've just started pick up put down with our 6 month old, the change has been unbelievable, absolutely kicking ourselves we didn't do it earlier. She has always gone to sleep on the boob for all naps and at night and would wake twice in the night for a feed, we've now had 3 nights of 12 hours sleeping through from the second night onwards, no feeding. I think it's gentler than CC as you don't leave them, they cry out of frustration but not out of fear as you're with them the whole time telling them everything is ok. We've just decided that whilst it's hard to hear them cry initially, we're trying to teach her to put herself to sleep for her own good, and she has been a happier baby since we started and is napping better in the day too. Maybe worth a go? Best of luck, I know it's so hard x
Jessica I could have written your post not that long ago. I feel your pain. I've also had it up to my eyeballs with people saying 'just chill out and accept it' 'let baby sleep with you/hold them to sleep' 'it will all settle down eventually'. That's a slippery slope - I know as we tried to be relaxed and flexible - it was a disaster to the point when dd (now 2) wouldn't sleep in her bed at all day or night.
We use CC and it works. The key is to be consistent. Some say don't pick up or even speak or look at your child. We've been much softer going in initially as soon as she starts crying and rub her back. When she was younger we did pick up/put down which you may want to do given your LO is so little although now we try not to pick her up. And never take her out of her room. For all subsequent times she cries, we go in only when she is getting distressed. Often she will cry out but then go quiet - she's just trying to settle herself. Whatever you do, try and do the same for all naptimes and bedtime so she learns it's just sleep routine.
Initially we tried it at about 12 months and have used it regularly since whenever we've slipped back into bad habits (dd had a cold recently so she slept in with us for a week). On Monday she wouldn't nap in the day and cried for an hour that evening (beyond overtired). But for the last two days she's had 2 hour daytime naps and 11 hours at night no problem.
Yes it's horrible to let them cry at all. But they learn so quickly. And the goal is to help them sleep better and learn to self settle. The first night is always the worst. But you should see a quick improvement. Some say it may take a week - it's never taken more than 2-3 days for dd to have nailed it.
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