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We both want different things, is it time to go our seperate ways?

(5 Posts)
Moomin0 Wed 08-Jul-15 21:15:44

Hi, I'm using my friend's Mumsnet account so I hope no one minds, she's kindly given me access as apparently you are all very brutally honest on here, which is good.

I've been with my boyfriend for about a year now. Everything is great on the surface, we were really happy and got serious pretty quickly, so I ended up moving in with him within 5 months. My big issue is this:

1. He keeps changing his mind about age to have children/if he wants them or not. At first he said he wanted them soon at the beginning of our relationship, then he said he wanted to wait 4/5 years, and now he doesn't really want them and today he said in front of his Mother that he 'doesn't want kids until 28/30', which he's mentioned to me recently too. I want them quite soon, as I'm financially stable and ready (I know the work they intone, I handraised my own brother due to complications with my Mum's health. So this is a HUGE issue for me.

2. He wants to TRAVEL. Like, he keeps bringing up, 'will you travel with me/will you come to Alaska, Brazil, Australia etc etc'.

3. He has a curiously low sex drive, which no where near matches my own.

I feel guilty too because yes, he KNOWS how much children mean to me and won't budge, but I also KNOW how much this whole travelling Melark interests and excited him. (He's already said he wouldn't think of travelling without me). Perhaps it's not healthy that I won't support him and encourage him to grow as a person? So I'm also to blame.

I just need some opinions, because quite frankly I love him with all I have, it's just we want such opposite things in life.

Thank you all x

FlossyMcTrumpetson Wed 08-Jul-15 21:34:52

1. Move this question to 'relationships' section. Or AIBU.
2. Don't have kids with this dude.

NoArmaniNoPunani Wed 08-Jul-15 21:37:31

How old are you both? I think it's pretty average to not want kids until 28/30 so if you want them sooner you might have more luck with a much older man.

RandomMess Wed 08-Jul-15 21:39:45

You don't sound on the same page. I would go your separate ways. Mismatch sex drives rarely works for starters!

SocietyClowns Wed 08-Jul-15 21:53:58

Biggest red flag for me would also be a mismatch between sex drives. Do you want to commit to having children with this man and potentially have no sex ever again?

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